


Storm Front

by cookidoughlilac, meikahidenori



Series: Stardust & Ocean Waves: TAG R18+ Smut archive - Gordon and John Tracy pairings only [7]
Category: thunderbirds are go
Genre: Brother/Brother Incest, M/M, R18+
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-10
Updated: 2018-01-11
Packaged: 2018-12-25 23:10:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 70,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12046248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cookidoughlilac/pseuds/cookidoughlilac, https://archiveofourown.org/users/meikahidenori/pseuds/meikahidenori
Summary: Written pre and post 'Grandma Turismo'.





	1. Warmth

**Author's Note:**

> Written pre and post 'Grandma Turismo'.

“Thunderbird Five, This is Thunderbird Four, how's the weather looking up there?” Gordon let go of the intercom button and waited for a reply. He was bored and starting to get a little antsy trapped inside his little submarine. He had been stuck inside for over a week tracking an underwater submarine that had been transporting something or another for the GDF to a facility in Antarctica and had surfaced for some fresh air only to have Thunderbird Four get trapped on the surface in the ice. He hadn’t called in for aid just yet, he was hoping it would eventually melt enough to get free - however things were looking pretty grim on that front as snow storms were buffeting the craft so rescue from Thunderbird Two would be virtually impossible anyway. To quell his growing boredom he spent most of his time pacing the submarine and now was desperate for conversation, even if it was just about the never ending snowfall.

“Thunderbird Five, this is Four, John are you there? Please tell me I still have a working radio.”

Somehow, John wasn’t at all surprised that he was getting an incoming call from his younger brother. Everwatchful from space, he’d been keeping tabs on Thunderbird Four’s position as he followed the GDF craft. Even while he was sending his other siblings away on rescues, Gordon’s position still held a portion of his attention in case there was trouble.

Which in this case, there seemed to be.

“This is Thunderbird Five, you still have a functioning radio. Weather conditions currently show no signs of improvement – a lot of heavy snow still is headed your way.” John dutifully explained, even though in other circumstances he would press that he was not the weatherman.

Floating around in the Global Coms Command Module of Thunderbird Five, John waited just a little before adding onto the end, “Your positioning hasn’t changed for some time now. Is everything alright down there Gordon?”

“Yeah, more or less. More storms huh? That's… joyous.” his voice petered out with a hint of sarcasm. “Holographic signal still kaput though. So… what's shaken’ besides my fingers?” he asked.

“I’m sure Thunderbird Four is equipped with plenty of thermal blankets, Gordon.” John couldn’t help but helpfully remind, knowing full well Gordon would of course know that fact about his own craft.

“Nothing major to report, though while Alan and Scott were on a rescue, Alan might have made a throwaway comment about glittering water in the pool…” he rattled on, “EOS decided to wake me up this morning by aiming a bagel at my face…”

Gordon listened and nodded along before thinking about maybe grabbing those blankets incase the storm got worse. After all despite the thermal drysuit he still only wore cotton trunks beneath and it wouldn't be long before he'd feel the chill through his uniform. Thankfully he wasn't wet, he didn't have a change of a spare if it was.

“That computer has a sense of humor still I take it?” he said smiling at the thought of his brother's AI companion pestering him till he felt miserable as.... wasn't that his job? He sighed and as his brother prattled on, hunted around for those fabled blankets… Which were not where they should be.

“Uh John, can you double check my inventory list? I don't seem to find any blankets on board.” He frowned and checked the other small storage hold and came up empty. “I know I haven't had time to check everything is up to scratch between rescues lately, seems like I'm never home long enough to shower let alone much else.”

“Doesn’t it always feel like that Gordon?” John remarked softly as he brought up the inventory list, “I’m sure it won’t be forever. There are times when you’re barely needed, so that must be a plus…”

He busied himself with Gordon’s request, getting into the recent and second most recent supplies log for Thunderbird Four. According to the data, Gordon should have had everything replenished, from ration bars to the missing blankets.

“They must be somewhere Gordon,” John started to say before stopping again, “Unless the blankets were hauled into the wrong pod again. How well are you doing down there? Think you can hold out a while?”

  
“Well there not.” Gordon snorted, frustrated. Well, at least searching for them was keeping him warm. He let out a sigh. “Hopefully I can hold out, maybe stuck here a while.” he checked his ration supply and looked worried when he realised there was probably only enough fresh water to last two more days. Maybe he could go outside via the lower hatch and chip some ice so he could melt some?

No of course he couldn't. Even in his thermal drysuit there was no way he was going to survive the chilly temperature long enough. Freezing to death in the sea wasn't an option.

John could do a supply drop from space, couldn’t he? As there was no possible way Virgil could fly Thunderbird Two in THAT.

He couldn't see a thing outside the tiny submarine now but he could hear the wind trying to tear his only protection from it apart. He started to wonder if it stopped was Thunderbird Four even capable of going back below the sea without having a system failure.

“There are times I'm barely needed huh?” Gordon frowned as he tapped the heating gauge. Why is it that everyone spoke down to him anyway? It's as if they didn't want him to be a part of the team. There was times where he was the only person small enough to get into a tight spot to reach a rescue victim to administer first aid but because he wasn't the one with the big flashy equipment or aircraft he usually got side stepped as someone unimportant. Well, that's what it felt like even if it wasn't true. Maybe next time he'd wait for John to radio him - though by the time he got around to it after dealing with everyone else's rescues he'd have probably become a human icicle.

“Times when calls barely come in and you all get a break.” John emended, having imagined the frown that probably appeared on Gordon’s face, “Not you in particular, though I believe after this mission is over Scott’s giving you a weekend break.”

He gave him a little smile from up in space. “Not all doom and gloom Gordo.”

“Hey John, how do you keep warm up there in space when the heating doesn't work anymore?” Gordon asked after glancing at the systems on Four. He didn't want to alarm his sibling, but they did stop within a few days of reaching the arctic circle base.

“What do I do?” John parroted, pondering over this brother’s sudden question. “Well, I’d probably first check what caused the heating to stop working and see if I can fix it by myself. If I can fix it, I fix it - if not, I go for a run to keep myself warm and notify the island that I need some new parts to fix the heating unit.” John explained, listening to his brother’s grumbles.

“Huh.” Gordon snorted. “Well I hate to tell you John I don't have the luxury of space to run around in.” he glanced around the tiny rear cabin of his machine. “I also have to be on the outside to pull the panels off the touch the heating unit and that's not an option either.”

He pulled one of the dry tubes medbeads down to sit on and shivered. Fingerless gloves were a stupid idea for his drysuit as he could barely move them from frostbite.

“So…. You sound like you busy…” Gordon rubbed his arms to try and stay warm. “Other rescues keeping you occupied or your ‘lady friend’ is visiting hmm?” he asked, just to keep John talking.

“You did ask what I do, so I gave an answer. As far as I was concerned, it wasn’t supposed to be a reflection on the size of Thunderbird Five.” John replied flatly. “As for why I sound busy, Alan and Scott were on a rescue, just as I said. They’re back at home now, so I have to deal with the report once Scott’s finished giving me all the details. The usual. …as for Ridley, she’s been quite busy with GDF-related work, so I haven’t gotten the chance to meet with her this week.”

John walked to the small bench he used to read in amongst the stars, and pulled a leg up to rest his chin, “Have you got enough food and water to keep you going at least?” He asked, tilting his head to one side even if he couldn’t see his brother. “Jogging on the spot might warm you up, if you don’t have the space.”

Gordon let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, yeah I did ask didn't I?” he tapped the medbed and lay down on it, regretting trying to elicit any ‘actual’ information out of his sibling. At least he had a friend to talk to as to starve off loneliness these days - Gordon couldn’t say the same. He kicked the roof of the submarine in frustration and that's when the medbed decided to fold back into the dry tube, trapping him inside.

John had continued to listen to his brother’s woes, despite having a small feeling that Gordon was probably grumpy at him now and wouldn’t have really wanted him to continue talking. The occasional swears coming from a most likely cold sibling made John feel a pang of guilt – he had been the one who sent Gordon on this mission after all.

Gordon swore and tried to get it to fold back out but it was stuck fast due to the cold and all his banging achieved was the whole tube being shot out into the snow storm and slide across the ice till it slammed into something, hopefully a wall of ice. Gordon tumbled out and rubbed his head, the unexpected ride throwing him around like peanuts in a tin can. Getting to his feet and shielding his eyes he tried to see where Thunderbird Four was but all that was visible was a whitewash of sleet and snow.

“John!? John do you hear me?” Gordon pressed the com on his sash with one free hand while the other shielded his face. “I have a bit of a problem!”

Static.

He tried again. “Thunderbird Five do you read me?”

John continued to listen to the radio that connected his little brother to society, his only way of communication left. Hearing the bangs that resonated from what he hoped was just Gordon kicking the hull, the sudden sound of rushing air and then static made him sit up and pay a little more attention, bringing up the holographic positioning of Thunderbird Four.

He’d lost communication with Gordon and what was worse was that the small hologram of Four was displaying a notification that one of the dry tubes had been ejected from the craft… with Gordon presumably inside.

John scrambled to boost the radio signal strength, but even he was struggling to make the signal any stronger - even with EOS as help.

“Gordon? Gordon! Thunderbird Four, are you receiving this? Gordon!”

Gordon could hear something come from his communicator but it was impossible to work it out over the winds pelting his ears. He felt around for the dry tube and slammed one of his hands against it.

Cursing loudly he shook life back into the hand before hunting around inside for anything of use but came up empty. He had two choices, stay where he was and freeze or attempt to find his stranded submarine in the storm and freeze. Neither was a great option but even if John couldn’t get through to him at least if he was mobile he'd eventually find some help.

There was no way his brother would be crazy enough to send his other brothers out to retrieve him, it was far too dangerous and technically he shouldn’t have been there in the first place.

But he had to surface for air…..

The only major shortcoming of his small craft - it had a limited oxygen supply. If it could have a continuous re-circulation of air like Thunderbird Five he wouldn’t have had this problem but there was nowhere to store the components required to have that functionality.

If only he wasn’t acting like an idiot he’d still be inside it and far warmer than he was out here.

Shivering, he started to walk in the direction he thought was the right one. The snow was up to his waist making each step feel like his feet were in cement and no amount of rubbing his suit till his fingers were red raw was going to give him any warmth.

Thank goodness his suit wasn’t wet, not that it mattered now. It still wasn’t thick enough to keep out the bitter cold.

He didn’t know how long he had been walking but he should have found his craft by now. The fact that he hadn’t was starting to make him panic.

“J-John? Please res-respond!” He spoke into the com in his sash again. “Please, if you hear me… remotely do something to T-Thunderbird Four s-s-s-so I can f-find it…”

Drat. The radio link made the most awful noises as Gordon tried to communicate back to him. Evidently he was now outside of his submarine – on land – and he was caught in the middle of the snow storm.

So much for getting comfortable, now he had to make his way back to the Global Coms Command Module and locate the small yellow craft before Gordon froze… no he couldn’t think negatively.

Moving in zero-g suddenly felt like a chore. His mind was already trying to figure out how to get Gordon to safety, or to his own sub, that John wasn’t paying attention to his movements, meaning he flailed around while trying to push himself through the weightlessness of space. He had to move quickly though, his brother depended on him this time. Not Virgil, not Scott, but him. John potentially held Gordon’s life in his hands right now with that snowstorm and he couldn’t fail his gold medalist swimmer of a brother.

The small yellow triangle on the holographic screen was all that mattered right now. If John could quickly triangulate Gordon’s radio signal, then he could set up a set of arrows pointing Gordon back to the slight warmth of his precious yellow Thunderbird.

First things first, though, was to switch on every possible light inside and out of the craft. Hacking into her systems was easy work for John since hacking was pretty much a requirement in order to help his family when they were out on rescues, yet it still felt like he was violating what didn’t belong to him.

John then set to work on finding where his brother was. Once Gordon was found, Gordon could be guided safely back. The snowstorm still surged on, according to the forecasts, which made locating a tad harder. John could do it though, and the moment he did, he set up a set of arrows on Gordon’s holographic display.

He hoped that the lights were on. In fact, he hoped every light was on; a shining beacon to guide his sibling back.

Gordon had collapsed in the heavy snow and rolled on his side, or at least tried to. It was up around his waist and he was completely numb from the chest down - he had never been so cold before!

At least his body was still shivering, that was something. It meant he was still alive.

Wait...was that a crackle from his coms?

He forced himself to get up despite sinking deeper into the snow and tried the comm button on his sash one last time.

“J-Johnny? Is t-t-that you?” his lips were quivering. He was genuinely scared that he was all alone down here in the blizzard. Usually he, like John didn't mind his solitude in his craft but this wasn’t a time to be a loner.

He rolled, attempting to get free from the snow drift when he was forced to shield his eyes, this time not from the sleet but from bright lights blinding him.

Thunderbird Four was a few feet away.

John didn’t know why he hadn’t thought of it before. Gordon’s drysuit may not have had as detailed a bio-circuitry system as his own spacesuit had, but when traveling to the depths of the ocean the drysuit had to be able to relay vital information back in case Gordon was in danger.

His heart was in his throat as he watched the dot that represented Gordon move agonizingly slow towards the yellow craft. Temporary relief rushed over him like a wave to know that his brother had either seen the lights, seen the guidance from the holographic display, or both. As the dot moved closer, being able to gain access to the vital information being processed from the suit was easier to do. Evidently once this ordeal was over and Gordon was safely back at home, signal strengths were going to have to be adjusted and measured again.

Growling, Gordon half dragged and half wrestled his way to the yellow submarine and felt his way around for the rear hatch which was still stuck solid.

He sank into the snow in the protective cover the craft could provide buffeting the wind enough that chills were no longer making him fight to keep awake.

But being outside of Thunderbird Four wasn't ideal. For one, he needed better shelter to hold out till the storm eased which he hoped would happen soon.

He rested his head against the external rear jets, now long since cooled from a lack of use from being on the surface and drifted off, unable to keep awake any longer.

…This is definitely not good. Gordon’s core temperature was dropping significantly and what was worse was that John couldn’t tell if he was inside the craft or not. The still dropping temperature suggested the latter, causing the older Tracy to rethink the situation.

“Gordon?” John tried again over the comm on their sashes, “Gordon, can you hear me? Tell me what’s going on down there. Gordon?”

He had to remain as calm as possible. He being calm would mean that he might be less frightened and he’d hope that a calm voice might be a good link back to the notion of everything will be alright.

“Gordon! Are you there?” Gordon’s sash seemed to finally squeal with life, the static lifting as the storm was starting to ease. “Thunderbird Four! Do you copy?”

He was having trouble breathing, let alone moving. His body was freezing solid on the inside too. His fingers were bright red from the chill as his nose and his ears, his skin was going very pale - which was a striking contrast to his usual bronzed tan - he needed help fast.

Frostbitten, he ran his fingers over the coms on his sash and held them there, afraid the channel would shut down if he let it go.

“Help….” was all he could utter from his violently coloured red lips before his hand started to slip as he fought for consciousness. “..Johnny…” his voice was weakening in strength as his chest rattled the more cold air he inhaled. His mind was playing tricks on him as he was sure he wasn’t hiding behind the house but memories of being really small and being able to squeeze into tight places was clear as day, Gordon remembered there was a tennis ball he chased after for Alan into a large crack in the rocks and had gotten stuck, unable to get back out. John had come looking for them and as Alan was sent to grab their father for help, John attempted to pull him out himself, winding up with both of them getting wedged in till their father could get them free by making the hole bigger.

Funny how there was a time when his older brother was as small as he was….

He never really cried till then, panic filling every part of him however when he was at his most terrified his older brother was there to look after him.

If only he was here now.

The weather may have eased for now into a light snowfall but Gordon was out for the count, hypothermia starting to set in. He couldn't fight it any longer.

John floated around 22500 miles high, listening to his little brother practically fight for survival. Good news seemed to show that the weather was clearing – enough that Virgil could rescue Gordon and get him back home safe… but even John knew that deploying Virgil now would still mean that Gordon would have to wait until he got there. It wouldn’t take long but the wait could kill him.

On full power, the elevator would take only eight minutes to get down to Gordon.

One minute would be used to reposition Thunderbird Five and tell Virgil to get on his way.

Nine minutes in total to get to Gordon.

John’s body sprang into action even before he realized what he was doing. Words flowed out of his mouth and his hands were calculating and positioning his mobile space station over the Earth rolling under him.

Holographic lights around the globe showed Thunderbird Two’s planned course so he busied himself with getting to his exosuit launch up; various parts being clamped onto him from all angles. He’d practiced this before and soon was back inside the elevator, his exosuit on and several thermal blankets in tow.

How he got himself there so quickly he’d question later.

The elevator sped down, though the eight minutes felt painfully slow. Thank goodness the weather was better now, otherwise the cable would have been snapped in half.

“Don’t worry Gordon, I’m coming for you. It’ll be alright…just stay with me.”

Gordon struggled to open his eyes, frost had stuck them firmly together. It stung but when the pain really hit was when he managed to get them open.  
His whole body felt like an ice block, just like the time Alan locked him in the walk in fridge to pay him back for April fool's day.

That had not been a fun day, especially spending the rest of it in bed with John and Scott watching over him to make sure he was ok as they warmed him up, Scott lecturing him about everything and anything he could think of until John shooed him away. It wasn't all bad - John read him his favorite book ‘The life Aquatic’ in an attempt to cheer him up which was kind of him despite Gordon not deserving anyone being nice after going on a prank spree. Granted the year after his older sibling joined in with the most diabolical level of enthusiasm - but the fact someone had been nice to him had stuck deep within his soul.

He was too cold to feel much of anything however there was noises that suggested he was no longer outside. Thunderbird Four had a familiar eco when people were moving around inside is rear compartment, boots making a distinct ‘plunk’ sound.

He swore he could hear foul language as the sound of metal being dragged along the floor of his beautiful craft was heard followed by a slam of doors being pulled shut as best as possible.

The wind was starting to pick up again, the howling through the gap left in the rear hatchway making it sound far more ominous than it had been when he was trekking in it so he tried to roll over to see what was going on and came face to face with a pair of blue boots, whom of which he couldn't work out who they belonged to. His brain must be a frozen block as it was impossible to think about more than one thing at a time without a splitting headache piercing his skull. Something brushed against his face - only noticing it because it was warm and the only thing he could possibly feel as he lay in the cold steel hull of the Submarine.

He had to move. His brain was screaming at his aching frostbitten muscles to function but all he could achieve was the slight movement of his fingers on his right hand.

Whoever his rescuer was, he silently prayed they had mercy on their mind.

Now, John could have sworn Thunderbird Four had double airlocks, just like Thunderbird Five did. His original plan was to cut a human sized hole into the hatch of the craft, haul Gordon through and then gain access to the inside of the craft via the second airlock, then therefore be able to keep the wind and cold out.

That plan was well and truly gone with the wind.

He couldn’t help but feel a little guilty as he draped the thermal blanket over him – damage to a beloved craft was always devastating, no matter how small the damage was. However he had to damage the small yellow submarine in order to save Gordon’s life, so hopefully he could be forgiven.

Shuffling around the metal hull John pottered about, looking for anything that could make Gordon more comfortable, only he couldn’t find anything. Most of his food was out too, suggesting that he’d been getting hungrier as the cold set in. John shook his head a little and moved to the lighting system, dimming most of the lights on the inside so his brother wouldn’t be blinded accidentally. The lights outside remained on for Virgil however, in case the storm picked back up.

The cold air swirling through the craft was unbelievable. John really wanted nothing more than to just steal him away and take him up to the comforts of his space station but Gordon would really have his head if John separated him from Four and left the craft unattended.

Kneeling down beside him, he started to brush the knotted, snowflake-ridden golden hair out of Gordon’s eyes. He really wanted him to wake up soon... if not, John was going to have to just strip his brother out of his clothes himself and then burrito him up in the blanket…

Gordon shivered and his face twitched a little. His skin was still pale and the areas like his nose, cheeks and lips had lost all colour as they had started to go blue, even with the blanket starting to warm him up.

The problem was, the skin under his drysuit was all chilled from the sweat he had produced to get back to his craft which had turned to ice and because the suit was rubbery the melting ice had nowhere to go making him colder.

Sure it would dry and warm eventually but the process was extremely slow and he was going to go into second stage hypothermia long before he was going to feel any benefit from the blanket.

He flinched. Someone was touching his face. The feeling of scratchy material against his cheekbone under his eyes felt like sandpaper against his skin and he let out a noise to try and tell them to stop. It came out as a uncomfortable groan - but it was something. If he could move his lips to speak he would, so groans, squeaks and small yelps were all he could produce for now.

Very slowly he tried to turn his head away but it was being held there by another starchy feeling thing by his jaw and feeling trapped he strangled out a mild yelp masked in a sharp gasp, the intake of cold air a very bad idea as his lungs felt stabs of pain trying to take it in.

Gordon had trained himself over the years to have a large lung capacity, an accidental almost drowning in the pool lead to him wanting to do everything he could to prevent it again which lead to him having a broad and deep chest unlike Virgil or Scott who both worked out to keep up their fitness. It also lead to alot of problems with self confidence, as he couldn't shape the rest of himself to do the extreme level of strength related work that they could but there were advantages like being able to hold out longer than most people when his air ran out and to be able to go into more inhospitable places because he could cope far better with the air quality.

Right now though, they were struggling to use any of it. He felt like he was suffocating with some animal clawing into it even though there wasn't.

He groaned and let out another strangled yelp from the pain. He would rather have his body caught in hundreds of bear traps as opposed to this where every frozen muscle was screaming and waving checks around that his brain couldn't function properly to cash.

He shivered again, violently this time as the scratchy things started to move down his bare back and expose him to the chilled air, peeling his suit from his body. He wanted to call out to stop but there was nothing he could do, his body involuntary shaking as it fought to warm him up.

He whimpered, unsure what was going on and what was happening to him.

Gordon's suit suit had to go. John feared that if he didn’t warm up soon, he was going to lose his little brother before Thunderbird Two could arrive and either take him to a hospital on the mainland, or the infirmary back on the island.

John was relieved at the very least that Gordon was making noises. He couldn’t really tell what the noises meant, but if his own brain was anything to go by, he was cold and was slightly afraid as to why his suit was being removed. He doubted that his brother had registered that it was only him… but Gordon was currently very vulnerable.

The top half of the suit was soon removed, John was quick to pull down the top half of his space suit, knowing full well that skin-on-skin contact was going to be a lot better. He kept sat behind Gordon, pressing his back against the cold side of the hull and used all his strength to hug him as close as he could without hurting him.

John had his sibling sitting up now, leaning against him. He pulled the thermal blanket up to offer more heat to his little brother’s frozen body, no way was he going to let his brother fall even colder.

Warmth….

Gordon could feel something warm against him and stirred. It wasn't much of it but his brain had started to override his complaining body demanding it to move and seek the only thing that was going to keep him alive.

He shifted his hand and spread out his frozen fingers to touch the source of the heat and felt something shiver at his touch. It felt soft and fairly solid and it wasn't long before he registered what it was heating him up.

It was the mystery rescuer.

It couldn't be anyone other than Virgil, there was no one for miles but then wouldn't he have squirreled him aboard Thunderbird Two and left him alone in the cargo bay?

Then who was….?

The restrained sneeze gave them away.

“J-Johnny?” Gordon croaked, barely audible to his own ears. “J-John? H-h-how?” he mumbled, wincing as the air pierced his lungs like fangs.

He moved his hand across what he now knew was his brother's chest, the feeling of bone under the soft exposed flesh under his fingers more evident.

Wait, if John was here trying to keep him warm, it meant he was going to end up as cold as he was! He had to do something to prevent that, at least one of them needed to be ok if Virgil arrived with his big bird.

Groaning he shifted under his brother's embrace to position himself so he could cuddle him properly, his other arm wrapping around John's back and moving so his body was not just pressed against his older brother but also using himself as a human blanket, his head resting under his sibling's chin and the rest of him making as much physical contact as possible.

John was not allowed to freeze. He needed him to get them out of here.

It took alot more effort than he bargained for, almost blacking out as he moved his position around. He was convinced it really was John with him and not his imagination brought on from the fever that was threatening to take over his body once he started to heat up, what he was lying against was human as there was nothing else inside his craft that felt like a gradually cooling down hot water bottle.

Unless…

He had passed that second stage of hypothermia and was deep within the third, his brain hallucinating to try and make his eventual death in the snow and ice and pleasant and painless as it could.

It wouldn’t be the first time it did so. There was times rescues went wrong and he just managed to survive by the skin on his teeth, more than one occasion he thought he might not make it alive. It was all well and good for Scott to act like a heroic daredevil but he's never had to leap off a collapsing platform to safety at 4,000 feet without the safety back up of a jet pack nor has he been inside a craft at 7,000 fathoms that had been torn wide open like a sardine can and being exposed to pressures so intense your body could be sucked into your helmet the second you lost any second of air.

You could only laugh it off like water on a duck's back for so long. In the privacy of his room back home he'd bury himself under the mess until he was certain he was no longer terrified of almost committing voluntary suicide just to save people who would never know who they were and while the thank yous and relief were genuine - they didn't quite make up for the nightmares and almost heart stopping panic attacks that came with them.

No. It really had to be real…. But it couldn't really be John could it? Oh damn now he was confused. Was it, or wasn't it him he was clinging to?

It would have to be the first in a long time his older brother had come to his aid, that was certain. Gordon wasn’t little anymore and was expected to look after himself.

Except he couldn't all the time. It was nice to think you were invincible but deep down Gordon needed his brother around.

But he wasn't supposed to, heck he didn't have much in common with any of them since the older three did university studies and he deferred, thinking extra studies can wait as where were they going to go?

Maybe it was only him thinking that it was John from the sneeze and the reality was it was a total stranger he was lying with? Up till now he'd been doing everything with his eyes shut, it was too painful to open them yet so he was just hoping he was right.

Then again, why would John come to his rescue when Virgil couldn’t even get there?

He had to open his eyes to check.

Slowly, he let the pain overtake his senses as he stared bleary-eyed upwards and shut them faster, wincing with how much it hurt. Ok so that didn't work, he didn't see much other than the really pale skin on his rescuer's shoulders, smattered lightly with faint freckles.

“John… please let it b-be you.” he whispered.

John kept quiet most of the time, keeping his arms wrapped around Gordon’s freezing torso to try and speed up the process of warming him up. He noticed how his brother was starting to mumble more, making more noises that were beginning to resemble sounds and words.

The shivering and chattering weren’t stopping though and John could feel how Gordon was trying too hard – it was going to end up hurting him more.  
He only really looked down when he felt Gordon properly shift around and snuggle into him. Those movements looked labored and extremely painful but if Gordon was able to move, it meant at least he was responding still to what was going on around him.

“It’s ok Gordon… you’ll be ok...” John soothed, looking down and brushing his hair out of his eyes. “You’re safe now... we’ll get you nice and toasty warm and hopefully safe in no time… just relax…”

As carefully as he could manage, he pulled Gordon’s frozen body so he was nicely arranged in his lap and tucked his little brother’s head back under his chin, pausing to give him a kiss on the forehead. Their mother used to do it before she died… and when John had to fill her place, he was the one who’d give them reassuring kisses on foreheads to tell them it was alright and that they were brave boys... they grew up so quickly after that.

He kept himself leaning upright against the cold metal. Gordon’s comfort and safety right now was most certainly being put before his own; ensuring this was continuously the case as he again rearranged the blanket around his brother.

“Gordon, take it easy,” John resumed in a slow, soothing voice. “I’m going to have to take the rest of your drysuit off and then you’ll be able to warm up nice and quickly, ok? Don’t worry… I’ve got you safe…”

Gordon stretched out in response. “Nnnn no… t-too cold. Can't let you g-get cold.” he started to wriggle a little, suddenly feeling very hot. He wasn't really but he had been frozen cold for several hours now that a fever had started to form in response. His head felt on fire and was making him uncomfortable.

As he shifted again, one of his hands went under the lower unstripped half of John's uniform and rested in his lap, where the warmth was real - more real than the burning sensation in his head.

“I’ll be ok.. I won’t get co—old…”

Ok, now this was an interesting turn. Surely Gordon must be hallucinating a little but either way, from having zero hands resting on the inside of your suit, to suddenly one hand behind there… well, he had been in space a while… he’d forgotten that the human body would actually react like this when getting touched... even when wearing undergarments.

Jesus his hand was cold.

It was the same feeling as having to put ice against oneself when you’d been injured, only this time the “ice” was having the complete opposite effect, making John feel even hotter rather than cooling him down because ultimately, it was a hand and not a bag of ice.

An actual hand.

Belonging to his brother.

Down under his space suit.

He thanked all the lucky stars above that Gordon hadn’t gone and stuck his freezing hand under the smooth trunks he wore underneath and had only arranged his hand on top. Then again… those stars were probably dead already due to the fact that light can take years to travel, so he could just be jinxing himself.

He really hoped he wasn’t.

“G...Gordon… are you uh…” He coughed a little and tilted his head back in a failing effort to cool his face down and not blush. “Are you f…feeling ok?”

“Hav -ha….have to keep warm… m-m-must k-keep John warm….”

Gordon breathed heavily as his hand started to feel around, gently massaging and stroking with his fingers. Just like his siblings he did all the training and knew there was one sure-fire way to keep someone warm without blankets. He would have tried it on himself hours ago but after Penelope kicked his feelings to the curb he honestly couldn't bring himself to do it.

But John… he'd appreciate that he could do something so one of them stayed toasty, even if it was wrong.

It wouldn’t matter. Even if he made it out of this one he was sure he wasn't going to meet anyone. Heck how long did it take John to ‘magically’ bump into Ridley O’Bannon? Scott and Virgil don't even have that luck, though if Virgil played his cards right Kayo would pounce on him in seconds.

He pulled his hand away and around his brother's hips.

He couldn't do it even if it was to survive. He had a girl - granted they were just friends - but Gordon couldn't ruin that for him by going ahead with it.

He tried to push himself off John's lap, only achieving to roll onto the cold steel floor and yelped when his head hit it too. That helped him come to his senses a little. He admired his brother, practicality worshiped the ground he gracefully touch down upon but this was all sudden, all new feelings he was unsure were real. He never told him how much he wanted to be like him. He began to shake uncontrollably, his body a mess of ice, fever, hormones and adrenaline all at once and too much for him to handle.

The good news was that Gordon was trying to move and therefore showed signs of slowly recovering.

The bad news was that John had indeed mentally jinxed it and now his brain was a little fuzzy from the attention Gordon was giving him.

His head was now completely tiled back against the hull of the ship, his neck extended and exposed. He really couldn’t help himself. This sudden feel-up, even if to just keep John the hot water bottle he provided himself to be, made his mind melt slightly. Gordon might not have brought him anywhere but it certainly took a few seconds to realize that Gordon had managed to get off of his lap and now was curled up and shaking like a fish out of water on the cold hull.

He was still topless.

It was this information that managed to solidify John’s brain and he braced himself against the hull to push himself up. Evidently his legs were in need of solidifying as well.

Damn Gordon and his ways.

He wobbled over to where Gordon was curled up in a fetal position and slowly kneeled over him, the dimmed lights in the craft making the atmosphere sleepy… or… sexy?

John wasn’t about to falter though, leaning over his brother and putting a hand on his shoulder to see if he was ok or not.

“Gordon? Gordon, what’s the matter?”

“I - I can't.” Gordon mumbled as he was rolled a little for his brother to check on him. “I r-really l-l -like you Johnny but I c-can't ‘c-cause you like R-Ridley, not m-me.”

His heart was racing and his voice stuttered as his breathing was short and laboured. If he was fine his brain wouldn’t have let it's guard down and buried these feelings away but they were all on show for John to see, never once had he ever felt so exposed, so guilty to have desires for one of his brother's.

“If….if I was ok in here….w-waiting out the s-s-storm, would you h-have come f-f-for me?” his teeth chattered and his eye's were barely open but he could make out his brother's elegant and fine features.

He didn't give him a chance to answer, a cold arm reached up pulling John's head down towards him and kissing him on his rosy pink lips, aware his were probably chapped and ice cold but he didn't care. If he got rejected now it wasn’t the end of the world - just the end of him wanting to pour his love out to another person openly as he had.

He couldn't face another heartbreak. He was more than happy to freeze to death than know the truth - that he wasn't a person worth caring about.

He needed someone to care again. Ok so maybe it was his sickly state talking but it was true - even if he was in his warm bed at home he'd be hugging toys to get to sleep as they don't judge you, don't care if you grow up - unfortunately they couldn't hug or give you love in return.

John was taken by surprise. Really taken by surprise. Gordon’s sudden confession – while at this stage could not be determined as either 100% real or the fever and chill talking – was certainly enough to throw the logic inside his brain, make him stop like a runtime error, only beginning to function again once the programmer – or Gordon – restarted the software by pulling him down for a kiss.

Something still was wrong. John could tell by the slightly warm drops of tears that pooled down his younger brother’s face. The contrast between warm, salty tears and the chill of Gordon’s kiss was certainly… different, but John wasn’t about to complain. In fact, he didn’t pull away from the kiss until he had to – he didn’t have gills after all.

A slight laughter bubbled up. It was in no way a malicious or mocking laugh, yet more surprised, unexpected and a slightly shy laugh. John honestly couldn’t help it when he was put on the spot like that, so instead of trying to reason his slightly ill-timed laugh, he simply tugged at Gordon until he was lying on his back and staring at the metal ceiling of his submarine.

He waited until the outburst subsided before sweeping his hair out of his eyes and pushing it back into its usual lick and turned to look at Gordon.  
“I uh… you should probably first know that I doubt Ridley and I will ever be a thing more than friends,” he stated, giving a slight smile, “I believe her girlfriend would take offence to that…”

John locked eyes with Gordon and took a hold of his hand, pulling it up to give a quick kiss.

“What else have you wanted to do with me?” He whispered, hovering over Gordon still. If Gordon wanted to do something more, John was somehow prepared for it. Granted, he was mostly inexperienced in anything to do with romance but he knew the basics… hopefully. Most of his mind rang alarm bells to say that this was wrong and that it would only be a temporary state of mind Gordon was in.

In a small part of his mind, he really hoped it wasn’t a temporary situation, caused by the fever Gordon had caught. While his brother may have been a little younger and quite childish at times, John still admired his professionalism and always noted how Gordon could go from playful to serious when he was needed to.

Hmmm? Gordon looked perplexed, though it was hard to maintain an expression John could read clearly.

He wanted him to do more?

Gordon made the attempt to sit up and felt tender and tentative hands grab him.

The first mistake John made.

Gordon pulled his brother's arms so when he was back against the hull he had his taller leaner and slinker sibling on top of him so they were pressed together again, only this time Gordon's hands were on the move, roaming around stroking and exploring the curves and hard surfaces that belonged uniquely to John while nuzzling his face inbetween feverish and needy kisses.

 

Even with frozen fingers he could feel his brother's bare skin feel like the most glossy silky satin and when he shivered he felt every tiny little goosebump that appeared on the delicate surface.

He was hesitant but it didn't stop his hands adventures, one untangling the red fiery flames of John's hair from the dry stiff hair gel making it untidy and wave as it should without being held back.

Neat, tidy and perfect - Gordon’s polar opposite.

He wasn't too distant to him though, they shared a lot of traits - the recklessness and risk taking behaviors than ran right through the entire Tracy family but it wasn't just those genetic strengths and failings - they both enjoyed moments of solitude and quiet and sometimes couldn't think properly under normal gravity - Gordon needing the high intense pressures of the ocean deeps while John the zero gravity of space.

Chalk and cheese - however things used to work out in a balance of yin and yang with each other, both extremes but similar in that difference that they were always in harmony.

If they could be symbiotic once more…..

The other hand playfully traced patterns and danced along his brother's flexible spine and towards the subtle curve of his backside. Gee he could tell his brother was bony and was naturally thin and it was exciting him even though this close to him John could feel him burning up around his head but he was refusing to let it win.

His brother could probably feel him through his suit too, he couldn't hide what this free roaming was doing to his own body more than what his sibling was doing in response, reciprocating his adventurous advances.

Gordon’s wandering hand that was closest to his brother’s suit slid down into it again and was bolder in touching him, running his fingers along the hard hot flesh that dwelled there and listened to the gentle and sensual purring he elicited from him as he could feel John's warm breath by his ear.

How could he let him know he was serious in how he felt?

Ah.

His other hand left the tangled mess of his brother's red flames and guided one of his hands into the depths of his own suit, letting out a little growl as he felt his brother's tentative fingers.

No sooner had John suddenly been pulled on top of Gordon, he could feel his brother’s magical hands start to work their way around; one challenging the gels in his hair and the other swirling around his skin like a paintbrush to a canvas. His hands were so unbelievably cold still and due to that fact, the “paintbrush” was definitely leaving an artistic pattern across his skin in the form of goosebumps. It felt quite sensual and ticklish at the same time that John was starting to make small noises of his own – little breathless giggles between the endless attacks of kisses.

He’d never really gotten into anything as serious as this. When he was at school - whether high school, college, university, whatever - when it came to work he worked. Of course he attended parties if his mates were going but he was never one who drank to get wasted, instead preferring to just enjoy the drink for the social aspect and still be able to study somewhat clearly if he felt like it when he got back to his dorm.

Dating and having sex never really seemed up his street… but then again, neither did girls.

Everything tiny movement, every kiss, every brush of frozen fingertips all left John’s body feeling like jelly, his head feeling like a nebula and his body quivered as blood rushed around to his lower body, making his already ridged areas begging for more daring desires of attention.

Jeez… Gordon was like a drug that John couldn’t get enough of but he loved the feelings the experience was creating. Anything that wasn’t important didn’t matter anymore – Gordon was the sun and John was the earth orbiting him. Every sensation Gordon provided, whether it was the gentle tugs at his fire-like hair, or the feel of frozen fingers against warmer skin only intoxicated him more, felt like he was being rewarded with new life simply for being in the right place at the right time.

Gordon was full of wonderful surprises however and his breathing soon hitched when Gordon’s hand trailed down to end up where it started, only this time there was no silky barrier to stop his beloved brother from sending him to the moon and back. His space suit was starting to feel uncomfortably tight now and he was well aware that Gordon could also feel the restricted space he had in the inside...

All he knew was that he was certainly finding it harder to find time to breathe in between the lingering kisses they shared together.

When Gordon’s hand untangled itself from his hair and met one of John’s own, he could only be excited for what he was going to ask him to do. Despite how active he seemed now, John had to remember that Gordon was still stuck inside Thunderbird Four, still frozen, still awaiting rescue.

The usually soft cotton of Gordon’s trunks were certainly shaped now and - bloody hell - it was slightly strange to be given full access to someone else. He gave Gordon an experimental massage, to which he was rewarded with a sensual growl. Pleased that Gordon seemed to like this, John slowly continued to massage him, setting a gentle rhythm in which he used to change the pattern of the kisses. Each kiss was as slow and as gentle as the massages were and John now took control, determined to spoil Gordon in turn with the same amount of love and affection he had been spoilt with.

Gordon let out a sharp gasp and threw his head back, arching his whole body as he did so breaking the kisses he was now being showered with. John’s new found control had him taking back the lead, warm soft lips trailing soft fluttery kisses down his outstretched neck and shoulders.

The hand that lead John to his most hidden places grasped the free one and placed it on his chest, practicality begging his brother to stroke him and tease him in the one other place he enjoyed the sense of touch - a small trailing spot that sat under his deep rib cage that was so sensitive he squirmed, yelped pleadingly as he begged for more.

He was now flush with so much fever of desire he started to kiss more passionately with everything his soul possessed, as if he was giving himself to John as a gift to be loved by a beautiful god and be his lowly slave to do anything he wanted. John seemed to have a wave of ecstasy wash over him as his body started to rub against his with more intent, his head nuzzling the crook of his neck as he trembled all over. While he was distracted, Gordon licked his own fingers before tentatively sliding that hand under the lower half of the suit to join the other that was now slightly sticky with his siblings excited need to go further than heavy petting.

Those wet fingers were made warm and John reaction was unexpected, almost thrusting his pelvis into Gordon with the high demand for that little bit extra and the predatory growl in his ear was a sign that not only was his intrusive fingers sort of unexpected, they were also welcome even if it was clear Gordon was going to become the receiver.

He didn't mind. Feeling his siblings hardened body and teasing it revealed to him it's size and thickness and there was no way Gordon could match sexually if he tried. He'd take his brother any day and be his love slave for as long as he needed it.

“John…..” he panted. “I want you...to take me. Let me be yours to fill with everything you have.” he swallowed hard. It was the clearest thing he said the whole time his brother was here and even though he wasn’t feeling the greatest, being here with John was the best feeling in the world. Sure he wasn’t warming up well but that didn't matter - the blood rushing around was helping even the tiniest bit which was more than plenty for him.

“Please John…. Make me yours.”

John wanted to do everything possible to make Gordon feel pampered. While his brother had broken the kisses, John didn’t stop the light assault, instead kissing in time to each massage down his neck, pausing to focus his attentions to certain patches of skin that made Gordon make delicious gasps that left John wanting to hear more. Each new patch was worked on as preciously as the last; mixtures between kisses and gentle suckles created markings that weren’t so subtle on his skin.

He continued his exploration of his brother by starting to change up the speed of his fondling, gradually speeding up the gentle touching and daring to go under his cotton trunks and provide yet even more warmth to such a cold body. His fingers danced around Gordon, tracing, mapping, understanding what exactly he was being exclusively allowed to feel and see – something the rest of the world would probably only ever going to imagine. He felt privileged to be the one that Gordon trusted like this…

His other hand was slowly guided to Gordon’s bare chest and very quickly he began to trace patterns around the silky smooth skin that had a distinct smell of sea salts and… almonds? His smell was so intoxicating, that he had to shift a little, so his mouth could aid in the sense of touch and he continued to work his way around Gordon’s uncovered torso, until he found that one spot that seemed to send Gordon insane. Every breathless whimper that his brother made beneath him only geared him up more – made him continue in the task of tracing and tickling Gordon under his ribcage while in time, massaging him under his cotton trunks.

When Gordon squeaked out that he wanted to go further, John came to a temporary pause and looked at his brother. It wasn’t that he himself wasn’t prepared to continue but he still had to make sure that Gordon wasn’t going to be in danger. They had already done an awful lot and while he did want to continue, he also wanted to make sure this was actually going to be enjoyable on both ends and have no bad consequences.

“Are you… are you sure you feel up to it?” John whispered, in between tiny gasps when Gordon continued to play with him, “I don’t want anything bad to happen to you… you’re far too precious for that…”

Adrenaline was dictating everything now, Gordon’s brain alight while his body was feeling a berserk frenzy - ecstasy, pain and feverish delusional desire - unable to keep a lid on any of it. His body couldn't cope but he didn't care. If John stopped now he knew he'd go into shock either way- better to die in the arms of someone who loved you than someone who only teased.

He had to make a choice. No matter which one, he may end up passing out so what did he have to lose?

Gordon’s fingers pushed in deeper forcing his brother to stretch and arch his flexible body, his pale skin glowing in the low light. If this was what it was like to see an angel enjoying something sinful then Gordon was already long dead and in heaven.

Hopefully John got the message. Watching him almost make a mess in is spacesuit after that last playful finger moved into place and slid out a little and teased him in a little bit of an uncoordinated rhythm with him lightly tickling the pelvis and the length of his mystery surprise suggested this was the case.

He just hoped he could hold out long enough for his sibling to reach orgasm and be rewarmed up long enough for the storm to have passed. With how his own body was though, there was a chance he couldn't release due to the mixed signals. Hopefully John wouldn't mind that he couldn't function properly.

Gordon might not have said anything in response to John’s serious question but his reactions following it were more than enough to make John want to spring into action. His head was so unbelievably fuzzy from the intrusion Gordon was causing, that the surroundings of Thunderbird Four’s insides were beginning to blur… the only thing focusing right now being Gordon.

Wonderful, charming, handsome Gordon.

Whilst he started resuming his massaging and tickle-tracing at a slow and steady pace on Gordon, John pulled himself back a little, trailing butterfly-light kisses straight down his torso and belly. Little grins broke across his face as he heard Gordon muffle little giggles at the way the kisses felt, allowing John to mentally map where his brother felt more ticklish than not. The image that was Gordon being built inside John’s head was so bold and brimming with colour, it seemed to shine as bright as the personality his sibling had.

He loved all his brothers because they were his brothers but Gordon had always been ever so slightly different. They were both similar in their own ways and were also at complete opposite ends of the spectrum – space and sea, outgoing and introvert… hot and cold.

John’s hands were quick to move to the bundled up edges of the drysuit, and he took the opportunity to look up and lock eyes with Gordon as he began to peel the drysuit down even more, looking back down to kiss everything that was revealed under the suit. No patch of skin was left unkissed as the suit was pulled down and removed from his body.

As he moved back up and carefully took hold of the cotton trunks, the only item left of Gordon’s flawless body, John looked back up to gaze into those beautiful chocolatey eyes.

“May I?”

Oh hell why does he keep stopping? Gordon let out a muffled cry. It was sweet he was asking for consent but he was sure he had already given it the moment he begged aloud.

He knew his body was fighting the urge to make a mess, clinging to the warmth like a jealous lover. If John intended to keep playing with him he was going to be disappointed that his body was going to refuse to let go of the build up that was happening there.

Why couldn't have he have John with him like this when he wasn't in physical distress? He was enjoying it a great deal but there was parts crying in pain, some now glaringly more obvious than others.

All he wanted was that wonderful smell of honey and coconut to drown himself in, the one that mingled pleasantly with his brother's interesting but light musk that his sexually aroused body was giving, filling Gordon’s head with desperation to be under him and made his own.

He knew he was rough when he reached up and pulled his brother's face down to meet his, to kiss him with so much need he even brushed his tongue against John's in a bid to silently tell him to make love to him, be deep within.

“Do I ha-have to beg?” his voice pleaded as their mouths parted. He wasn't going to tell him to out right fuck him, the word itself sounding so far removed from what the whole experience was but damn he was struggling not spell it out for him.

He shifted one of his legs and wrapped it around John's slender waist, forcibly pushing his brother's lower body against his and a mingled growling yelp was elicited from him, his sibling feeling so nice pressed to him but the pain from his throbbing member was trying to get his attention too.

Please John…. Take the hint and do it already!

He lost his balance a little as Gordon pulled him down for a needy kiss but the feeling of his legs being wrapped around him, drawing him so much closer to his prize for being there in Thunderbird Four. Gordon still shivered beneath him and let out a wonderful noise when he felt John rub against him through the fabric of the space suit... boy did that noise make John want to just rip those trunks off there and then.

No... John wanted this to be such a pleasant experience for both of them, regardless of their current situation with still being frozen from the strong winds that had began to pick up again.

“You don't have to beg Gordon...” John drawled, starting to pull down the cotton trunks and fling them to the side once they were free of his legs, giving the insides of his thighs a kiss, “I just hope you’ll enjoy this as much as I will...”

With that teasing line, John started to worm his way out of the bottom half of his space suit, pulling his trunks away as quickly as he could. Granted, it was a little more difficult when Gordon's legs were still firmly wrapped around him but John was able to manage.

He didn't want to keep Gordon waiting but at the same time, he didn’t want to hurt him either. He was so close to making perfect music with his brother and he wanted it to be memorable for all the right reasons.

He balanced himself on one arm and took a hold of Gordon's hand with the other, leaning down to give Gordon another kiss as he positioned himself and took Gordon for his own... and oh my goodness, it was the most amazing, most breath-taking moment in his life. The way Gordon seemed to arch and lift right off of the floor of the hull... it was like magic.

Gordon’s breath got caught in his throat as he braced himself for the initial shock, once his brother was fully in did he feel like a part of him that was missing was in place.

It may have been a tight fit but he couldn't control the squirming his body was doing as it was getting used to the idea of something so big pushing up against areas he didn't realise were so sensitive.

All of a sudden he had no idea what was going on. Everything was a feverish blur. He felt something brush his lips but he had no idea what it was.

It was like he was a scolding river of lava on the inside.

Goodness... Gordon felt so good, like he was everything John had ever dreamed of. John felt like he barely was able to fit in all the way, yet somehow he was able to and oh god he loved the feeling.

He gave Gordon's hand a squeeze after a small while, not knowing if Gordon wanted him to continue or not. He couldn't do anything that would hurt him but he also didn't just want to go ahead without checking and wanted to make Gordon sing out all of those amazing, intoxicating sounds and noises he had been making when John was simply exploring him.

“Hey... G..Gordo... ready for me to continue on.... or d...do you want me to wait a little longer? I...I don't want to hurt you or cause you any damage at all... so... you might need to t...tell me if anything...”

“D-Don't stop.” Gordon managed to breathe out. “J-Just because I've never h-had this before, D-Doesn't mean I - Ah!” he gasped as a sharp shiver coursed through his nervous system.

“Heh… you and me both, then…” John whispered as he started to carefully pull out almost completely, to then push right back in with all the love and affection for his little brother that the session had made him realize was there. He worked up a gentle rhythm, always looking down to watch how he reacted to what was going on and to see his perfect little face display the ecstasy that they were both feeling.

Gordon was amazing. His back would arch and he would throw his head back every time John hit a certain bundle of nerves… and he could not get enough of this spectacular sight. He was drinking in every last bit of this and he never wanted it to end. Gordon seemed to fit perfectly under him, as if he was made and molded intentionally to be his and only his. Two parts of a jigsaw that when put together fit like a match made in heaven.

His own brain was turning to fuzz the closer he was and watching his little brother make looks of sheer ecstasy only made his brain fuzz more and blood rush faster south.

He didn’t want this to have to end at all…

Gordon let out a growl through his teeth. Damn was he losing grip on reality far too fast - but if John knew he couldn't handle it he may never do this again.

He probably wouldn't have in the first place if it wasn't for this need to be warm to starve off the cold.

He shook his head wildly as he was forced to stretch in response to the hot parts of his lower body, heated up too quickly because of his impulsiveness.

No, don't think like that. He tried to convince himself again that this wasn’t a one off thing of convenience. It was getting harder as his vision was faltering and the heat in his head was tearing through rational thought.

He felt his hands start to slip off his sibling's body as all his fight against himself was starting to falter.

No no no! It can't end before it even starts!

He was dipping out of consciousness and not by choice. Part of him wanted to cry as there was no way John was going to continue if he was no longer lucid and able to participate.

He fought hard to get his grip back on his brother's delicate sides and hold him close.

“D-Don't pull out….please don-”

The last of his strength was used to press his brother in tight with his own thighs before he was forced to let go, going into shock.

John was able to jinx his - and by extension, Gordon’s - own luck. It was too soon that John noticed something was definitely wrong with Gordon’s behavior. His facial expressions were starting to show pain and an awful lot of it.

Instinctively, John let go of Gordon’s hand and reached under him to take back a hold of his brother. He began to massage him again, hoping it would relieve a little of the tension and pain that was suddenly far too strong to ignore.

It didn’t even register until his brother started pleading and shakily trying to hold onto John that he realized this was caused by an imbalance of temperature and warmth circulating around his freezing, weak body and not because he was trying to hold himself off for a while longer.

John cursed to himself as Gordon lost consciousness. This was completely his fault. He read all the medical journals and books as part of the job requirement but because he had never had the opportunity to practice, it had cost him his brother’s wellness and could quite possibly cost his life.

That wasn’t going to happen though.

Not today.

Not while John was in charge of his little brother.

No more time for messing around, now John was going to get it right.


	2. Thank you

Gordon rolled onto his side and groaned. He had never felt so sick before in his life.

Slowly he opened his eyes, ignoring the hot feeling resting on his brow.

He was home.

Not just home but his own bed, tucked in and buried in between several stuffed animals.

He sat up on weak arms to look around. The usual bombsite of unwashed clothes was all gone, hell Gordon had no idea when was the last time he had seen the floor!

His bedside table had a few glasses of water residing on it along with a soup bowl and his favorite book.

Was this all real? had he died and this was his brain faking it to ease the transition?

Reaching out he felt the textured leather of the novel. It felt real enough.

He then noticed a desk calendar that he didn't recognize beside it. Picking it up he started at it wondering what all the little marking on it meant.

He had seen this somewhere before. Memory flicked a card and Gordon wished it hadn't.

The last time was when Scott had an accident that almost killed him. John had used it to keep track of how many days it took for him to be conscious enough to start rehabilitation.

So why would he use it now? Unless….

Gordon looked at the marks and frowned. They'd almost filled the entire month of June. 

He had been unaware he was that sick from that fiasco of a mission, he had been barely able to register being taken home and cared for four weeks.

Oh hell, did he pass out on John that day?

Must have - either that or all that stuff was in his head, created by his delirious state at the time.

His heart sank. It better not have been a dream.

He didn't feel perfect but he was determined to get out of bed and at the very least across the hall to the bedroom opposite to see if John was there.

And check if it wasn't his wistful imagination.

On wobbly legs he stumbled out of bed, clinging a large toy sea turtle before making the trip a few short feet to his brother's room - his current physical state complaining that it was further than what it really was - and almost collapsed against the open door frame.

Where'd all his energy and fitness go? Must have left it all in the ice and snow.

Four weeks. Four agonising weeks waiting to see if Gordon would actually get better or not. It was torture on the soul, especially as he felt at blame. Gordon wouldn't have been as sick as he was if John had just waited and nursed him back to health without making him partake in such strenuous and heart racing activities. 

Virgil didn't know any of it... or so he hoped. When he had come, he found John leaning against the hull of the small yellow submarine, holding a frozen burrito named Gordon as close as humanly possible. When Virgil asked why they were both naked, John claimed they were trying to keep Gordon warm with skin on skin contact but he was already too cold and it wasn't working... which wasn't strictly untrue…

He was a nervous whirlwind all of those four weeks. Between nursing his bedbound, unconscious brother and crying, he'd barely made an appearance before the rest of his family. MAX would usually be the one, sent up by Brains or Virgil, to deliver food and drinks so John wouldn't waste away. He was skinny enough as it was. 

John had tried so hard. 

The first week, he cried often. Almost every time he saw the state Gordon was in, he would just find himself crying. So he had busied himself with cleaning up the bombsite around his bed. Everything was either washed and hung in the spacious wardrobe, put into drawers in the desk, tidied away neatly into bookshelves or tv units or hovered up. He had even brought back in Gordon's old chair that he absolutely adored, having restored it well enough to be used again. It kept him busy enough, while he was with his little brother, keeping watch over him.

The second week, John was reading to him. Every single day, for hours and hours on end, he would be reading stories Gordon adored. It was just like when they were little. While Gordon was never interested in the stars above and space, he absolutely loved listening to stories John would read or make up. It had ended up, after their mother died, that Gordon wanted a story told to him every night otherwise he couldn’t sleep from the nightmares of the fatal holiday that took their mother. Stories engaged his imagination and would give him pleasant things to dream about and John hoped with all the stars in the sky that it was still the case.

The third week John was back to crying. He was so desperate to know if his brother was okay or not that he had started to even refuse the food or drinks MAX came up with. He still felt to be the one at blame, even though he never exactly told anyone why he was to blame, that he felt compelled to punish himself. His punishments he dished out where to stay awake at all hours to watch over Gordon, not bothering to look after himself because he didn't look after him properly. It took a stern lecture from Parker to make him snap out of it, where he broke down into uncontrollable tears and past out from lack of sleep.

The fourth week... was hard. He read to Gordon for the majority of the week, until he lost his voice from overuse. That was the ultimate torture possible, as now he couldn't communicate to his brother at all. He couldn't continue to apologise for what he had done. He'd let Gordon down.  
He deserved to be silenced for a while. His throat felt so bad every time he tried to use it that he simply stopped trying. He'd know when it would get better but it was easier to not have to try to use it at all for a bit... it didn't stop his tears though.

John had been curled up in his own bed, holding onto one of his pillows. Technically, he had never finished what they both started back in Thunderbird Four and since then he hadn't tried to finish himself off, it had just died naturally. He didn't feel the need to try and recreate the feeling either, as he knew only Gordon had the power to do that.

A thud at his doorway was what made him look up.

Gordon was right there... or rather, he was on the floor, crumpled up like a bit of paper. 

John was up quicker than the speed of light and was by his brother's side to help him up... but instead of taking him back to his room and his bed, John scooped Gordon up and took him to his own bed, laying him down on the soft duvet and sitting on the edge beside him... just like he's been the past four weeks.

“I see you're still hovering around here.” Gordon joked as he was plonked down, humour having returned. “Catch a cold? Thought you ate work for sustenance.”

John sniffed a little indignantly and reached over to the bedside table to pick up the mug of warm water infused with lemon and honey. Having been found out about his temporary lack of voice, Grandma was sending up multiple mugs of the stuff to help him get his throat to stop hurting and hope his voice will come back with it. At least Gordon's sense of humor had returned at least. 

“Bagels” he half croaked out, coughing and then hiding his slight embarrassment behind the mug, “How...How're you fe..feeling?”

Gordon gave John a curious look while clutching his stuffed turtle. “I could ask you the same by the sounds, though you probably feel a mess - just like your bedroom I see. Transfer all my junk into here did you, Starlord?”

He shifted his position to lay on top of the turtle and peer over it like a pillow his brown amber eyes mildly perving on his sibling like they had millions of times in secret before. 

“Can I ask…. If we weren't cold….. would you have still..? I mean if I wasn't in trouble you wouldn’t have bothered coming and let Virgil pull me out right?”

“Th...at dep...depends..” John tried, pausing to sip some more of the soothing drink inside the mug before leaning forward to put it back down on the bedside table, “If you... as...asked nicely, I m...might have been able to—” 

He started to cough again. Speaking really was difficult, but he was trying because Gordon was here and he had to speak to him again.  
“You... we’re still stuck.... f....for a long time....”

Ah, what did it matter? John knew he was probably going to get nowhere with his voice in that state, so instead of continuing, he simply loomed over Gordon for a second or two, before leaning down to give him a lingering kiss.

“So - so I didn't imagine it…. You really did?” he stammered once his lips were free.

Oh fuck it, his brain decided.

He grabbed John's soft flannelette pajamas roughly and pull him on top of him, kissing him as passionately as he dared before snaking his hand under the buttons of his top and losing them as he went, not giving his sibling any chance to back out whatsoever.

He had to make up for that pathetic performance of their first try.

Gordon may have been weakened by all the bed rest he had no choice in but he was still able to roll his brother under him so he could raid him with feverish kisses, tease his sides with his fingers and offer his thanks in a way John couldn’t refuse.

[](https://imgur.com/V4FTwty)

He teased as he lowered his brother's pajama pants and started to nuzzle.

Damn, John was bigger than he felt that last time - maybe it was because he was far warmer.

Playfully, Gordon flicked his tongue over the tip and started kissing it, breathing in his brother's musky smell once more. He couldn't quite describe it but boy was it intoxicating and making him go hot under his own sleepwear. He gently grazed it with his teeth and used his tongue to his full advantage - John was long enough to lick from base to tip and vary his movements with his mouth to change the sensations he gave. Eventually, he teased the tip again, drawing it into his mouth lovingly like it was an icypole and out again to repeat the tease along the length again.

Hurricane Gordon had definitely well and truly arrived and in that instance, John had not known what hit him. From sitting up to suddenly been practically thrown into the middle of the bed with his little brother assaulting him with him... after being void of any kind of sexual activities, it felt insanely good. 

His breathing pattern hitched like nothing else as Gordon pulled down his pajamas and underwear in one go and pulled himself into his mouth. Bloody hell... that.. that felt really good. Gordon was unbelievably good at this – John doubted he was going to be able to control himself for much longer now that his little brother was fully switched on and ready to go.

“G...Gord- ahh! Door.... open st...still....” 

As much as John wanted nothing more than the pair to get right down to business, he really didn’t want anyone waltzing in on them... at all.

Gordon growled deeply with his brother still in his mouth so he could feel his throat vibrate. His right arm pushed John back down onto the bed and when braked his play, he shifted to straddle his brother so he sat across his stomach with his back to him pinning him under his body weight.

He maybe short but his stocky stature was well built in the top section and in his legs that if he really wanted to he could easily keep John pinned to the soft mattress without any threat to being shoved off him.

“Mine.” Gordon purred before returning to teasing John with his tongue slowly and seductively. “After, you can worry about the door.” and with that he attempted to draw his brother in as far as he could and anything that couldn't he stroked with his fingers lightly, taking pleasure in how his sibling was twitching, on the verge of letting all control go.

John whimpered a lot throughout Gordon's teasing. He was under a complete spell that his brother had cast, totally bewitched by the magic Gordon was performing. Blood was rushing around his body even faster again, thanks to him - but luckily four weeks of downtime meant that he wasn’t going to be the one to this time pass out on him. 

John looked up as Gordon stopped, his aqua eyes darkened and widened by excitement. His brother was changing positions, meaning John was pinned down. This fact didn’t mean much to him, only that he couldn't therefore try to repay Gordon in any kind... or so that’s probably what Gordon thought.

John made quick work of wriggling his arms free and he got busy with trailing his fingers up under the pajama top Gordon wore and started to draw in time to the attentions that he was being paid. Despite his sore throat and shaky voice, he still let out plenty of whimpers and noises of delight the more Gordon spent working him.

“G..Gordon... please....” 

Gordon purred as his sibling gently tickled him trying to get him to squirm but he remained firmly on top, the vibrations of his throat make John leak a little and he lapped it up, the light saltiness reminded him of his favorite sea flavored lollies.

“Nuh uh, You're going to relax and let it go. I'd love to really taste what you're like, John. Don't fight it, relax and let go.” Gordon teased as he continued to play.

God damn, he was so close now it was crazy. He kept on tracing patterns on Gordon's back, watching with quiet amusement as how his brother arched to the ticklish movements of his dancing fingers. He’ll get his own back on Gordon, he knows he will but right now his brain was fuzzing up so much that he could barely think straight.

“Oh g..god... Gordon... I can't.... I ca—ahhh! Ahh.....oh.... mmm....” 

Gordon had to fight the urge to gag, the sudden explosion of fluids filling his mouth and the back of his throat faster than he anticipated, some of it dribbling out as he pulled back hurriedly to cough up what had gotten stuck and making a bigger mess than intended. He sat his back against the wall that was alongside the bed and wiped his chin, grinning like a naughty child as he licked his salty, sticky fingers clean.

His dominant buzz was wearing off now to be replaced by a headache still from the last bit of fever he still had and slowly he was sliding onto his side back onto the mattress like a pot smoker who had achieved their ultimate high. 

He was in danger of falling asleep on John but this time it wasn't from his body giving up on him, rather he was contented to cuddle and doze off in the warmth safety of his brother's protection.

That... that felt really good. It felt like every tension, every worry... everything had just disappeared, vanished into thin air. He had to take little gasps to try and regain air he'd lost and slowly he shifted so he was on his side and looked at Gordon, beckoning him to come and lie down.

“Ah... y...your teddy... might need cl...cleaning...” he apologised, looking down at the turtle whom had also gotten a bit sticky. He carefully picked up the turtle and moved it so Gordon could come and cuddle up flush against him – a jigsaw slotting perfectly into place. 

Gordon looked pretty tired still and sleepy cuddles were just the ideal. As Gordon snuggled close, John wrapped an arm protectively around him and kissed him gently.

“You alright...?”

“Mmmmhmmm.” Gordon made a purring sound. He was already drifting off to the land of nod, something he had not done in his brother's room since he was three.

Good thing too, he had a bad night time habit that had started when he hit puberty and now after having a few of his naughty fantasies come to life, his brain wasn't afraid to voice his cheeky thoughts out loud when he was in a deep enough doze.

“Mmmm… love you John….” he mumbled softly as he nuzzled into his sibling. “I've always thought about you…..your blazing hair left untangled...your pink nose and rosy lips…..”

John smiled as he watched his younger brother start to doze off. He kept his arm around him, starting to gently play with the blonde sandy hair. 

“I love you too Gordon...” John whispered back, weaving his fingers through the soft hair, “I always will...” He murmured, keeping watch over his now sleeping brother like he always did.

Gordon continued to mutter in his slumber.

“I want to kiss those slender shoulders and nuzzle that soft spot where you collarbones meet….” he purred out as he breathed. “Those light blonde hairs on your chest that shimmer in the moonlight under my fingers and your nipples under my tongue… Every inch of you I want to taste, smell and caress….”

John had been half asleep himself when murmurs started coming from his cuddle pillow. It was enough to make him wake up a little and listen. Gee... even when he was asleep he was still entertaining himself.

Which gave John an idea. 

“Mm.... Gordon.... tell me more of what you want to do to me...” He just about whispered out, trying to keep his voice as steady and normal sounding as possible to keep the illusion that it was still a dream. He hoped that it would work, partly for playful teasing but also seriously. He knew that they'd already done a fair bit together, but most of what they did happened while Gordon was still fairly sick – he didn't know how trustworthy some of that information was.

But now... this could be the best game changer and Gordon would -hopefully - never see it coming.

Gordon shifted a little, stretching one arm out like a lazy cat flexing it's claws in the sun as he made himself more comfortable.

“....tie you down with handcuffs and tickle you with a feather before I rub you down with Vanilla and chocolate sauce…”

John's eyebrows disappeared into his hairline at Gordon's ‘oh so casually’ spoken sentence. He knew fantasies were often sweet, but he never thought literally!

“Is that so...? And what would... you have me do to you...?” he whispered again, slowly tracing up the side of his little brother while he was in fantasy land.

“Leather collar and leash to tug and keep body close...not rough because I trust…dominate but not out of cruelty… playful..”

John wrapped his arm around him again and listened to what Gordon wanted him to do... an interesting fantasy. 

“I'd never hurt you..... you’re too precious...” He said, giving his little brother a kiss on the temple, finally noticing a tiny sting in the corner of his eye. He was crying again, crying because he never wanted anything bad to happen to Gordon again.

Then his little brother purred with a dreamy smile on his face.

“Baby blue maid outfit….” he mumbled before adding, “I'd get a piercing on my tongue to pleasure you down on you long beautiful erect… you fill me inside over and over till day breaks ‘n we lie naked together only to wake up later to play again…. My body yours to do as you please, ontop, below from behind…..”

Then a small saddened frown crossed his features as he slept. “wish I was long enough to return it… maybe Kayo has kamasutra books I can borrow as I want to try…..once….to fill you….”

John wiped his eyes as he tried desperately to get the stinging to die down, all while listening to Gordon’s dreams and fantasies. This really was wild, though he was pretty sure he could get most of the things Gordon had specified in his mumbles. 

He could tell his little brother was really into this... and that he’d thought about it an awful lot. But... he also seemed to think about how he couldn’t return it... but surely they could try something…

He leant down to give Gordon a little kiss to try and wake him up a little, just in case he wanted to talk about these dreams and not just dream them.

Gordon fidgeted, his arm that lay across his sibling jerked a little before the tips of his fingers started to draw circles across John's warm skin as if he was drawing every planet in the solar system, mumbling the name of each one as he went till it reached the abdomen where the trails became wavy like the ocean and he started absently drawing fish till it moved lower and started making strange markings before resting on his brother's no longer secret place.

“Kraken.” he whispered before nuzzled his head into the space of John's armpit more and the talking seemed to subside.

John shifted so he was lying on his back and Gordon could lie across him. A small thought in the back of his mind suggested that he should probably put boxers and his pyjama bottoms back on in case someone came barging in and found the pair in a compromising position, but he couldn't bring himself to move his brother at all while he slept.

His hand went to join Gordon’s hand resting on top of him, both his hand and his lower body still feeling sticky from excitement. 

It could wait until morning.

Gordon then sneezed, waking him up from his slumber - the full body jerk taking him by surprise and forcing him to sit up for another.

“Ugh… I was getting comfortable.” he grumbled as he itched his nose.

Once again, John felt a bubble of laughter rise, and even though it hurt his throat a lot by laughing, he couldn't not laugh at how cute Gordon was.  
“Are you alright there Gordon?” He asked with a croaky voice, leaning over to give him a kiss. “I suppose I'm a little different texture wise to all your stuffed toys... which I will clean your turtle for you.”

John just smiled at his little brother's awkwardness, offering a nice big hug if he wanted it.

Gordon took the hug and returned it tightly. “No need to wash it as it smells like you now. I'd like that more.” he smiled before brushing his lips against his brother's neck. “Sorry I napped...taking alot out still.”

He wasn't super surprised that Gordon didn't want his turtle cleaned up.  
“Don’t worry,” John smiled, wrapping his arms around his brother, “if you feel a little more awake now, I'd still like to try something out with you... since we never fully finished last time...” 

He had to tease Gordon a little – after all it was his turn to spoil him rotten with attention, and he had the most magnificent glint in his eye.  
“I’m pretty sure I learnt a thing or two back in Thunderbird Four...”

“Oh?” Gordon looked at him slyly. Like what?”

John took the opportunity to kiss Gordon, while sticking one hand under his pyjama top and drifting his fingers in the sensitive spot below his ribcage. If his brother was suggesting a challenge, he had to be prepared to lose this round. 

 

“Ah!” Gordon gasped as he could feel a wave of ticklish pickles shoot across his body along his skin, goosebumps rising as he shivered excitedly.

“Ohhh...you tease!” he chuckled, shifting John’s open shirt. “Two can play at this game.” 

He leaned down a little and ran his fingers over one of his brother's nipples before starting to lick it and suckle it.

“Ooh.... mm.. Gordon..” John sighed happily, and most definitely “not” excited by his younger brother. He continued to tickle and tease his brother under his ribcage, all while snaking his other hand down.  
Gordon was not going to see that one coming.

With the most innocent of looks and devilish of intentions, John's hand snaked right under his bottoms, and started to fondle and stroke his excited younger brother, tracing the vein and feeling out the tip, just for a gentle play. 

“Nuh! Ahhhh...uhhhh….!”

Gordon had to stop what he was doing to try and get air back into his lungs, the teasing and sensitivity his body felt couldn't seem to keep hold of a single breath.

“Ahhhh J-John! Nuh uh!” he pleaded. “I'm not worth it - really not! AH!”

“You're not worth what....Gordon?” John purred in his ear, temporarily holding himself back on the tickles under the ribcage to focus on the tracing and gentle play of his lower regions. The moment his brother had ceased his attacks of attention, John knew that he had the upper hands this time and just like what a sleeping Gordon fantasized, he was going to make full use of it.

With his now free hand, he used to push Gordon down so he was lying with his head on soft pillows and his body spread out slightly on the duvet.  
Hopefully Gordon was going to enjoy this.... though he was pretty sure there was a pair of handcuffs lying around from the previous Halloween party... 

Gordon held John’s hand to his chest as he sank backwards and stretched out as shivers and orgasmic shudders coursed through him in a frenzied daze. While he still had his sibling's hand he brought it to his mouth and started to kiss each digit before licking them individually in the same way he pleasured him earlier. Fingers are delicate and highly sensitive and his brother's long thin ones were very soft and well cared for unlike his own which were always slightly calloused or pruned from rescues.

Every time a new sensation took over his body he sucked the finger he was playing with lovingly, trying to share how he was feeling through teasing in his own way.

 

Taking off Gordon's pyjama bottoms and the soft boxers that he wore underneath was a little bit of a difficulty, because now one of his hands were being treated just as he had been treated prior, he only had one hand left to do the job. 

“It's a little unfair, don’t you think?” John smiled, in between small intakes of breath as Gordon worked away at his hand and fingers, “That I'm quite undressed and you hadn’t even started...”

He was, of course, joking, however with his lower regions uncovered, John had the freedom to explore Gordon even more. He moved his hand back and started to fondle and massage him just like he had done back in Thunderbird Four but slowly he started to give little experimental licks, just as if he was working his way through an ice cream – He didn't want the delicious taste to be gone quickly.

“That's because you're the one who's more beautiful than any god that walks on this - UhhhAh!” Gordon threw his head back as he arched his hips up out of control, there was no way he could have stopped himself if he tried.

His knees jerked upwards as well as his backside lifted off the bed suddenly and he tried to roll away letting out a loud growl. He didn't deserve this, he wasn't worthy of any attention of this kind. 

“Nuhhh! Ah - John! Uhhhhh ah-ha ah!” he pleaded between short sharp breaths. Because he had let go of his brother's hand, John was now pinning him down in place and Gordon sunk his teeth into his own hand to try and keep the noise down. 

Alan's bedroom was next to John’s afterall.

John was lucky he had sharp reflexes as Gordon came undone right before his eyes. when he started trying to worm himself away, John plain out refused and gently pinned him down. He wasn't going to go anywhere just yet. Even if now he didn't want to continue - John was fine with that - he just didn’t want Gordon to leave…

“Gordon...?” he whispered once his little brother had quietened down, “Are you feeling ok?” 

That blasted door was still open... John sincerely hoped that Alan wouldn’t come snooping to find out what all the trouble was about.

“Uh…. Uh huh…” Gordon nodded in between labored breaths. “I - I’ve never had anyone ever want to… though… no one's ever kissed me either.”

He started to get shy and buried his head in his arm.

“Everyone - even you - have these amazing bodies…..looks that are handsome, sexy and attractive…. I still don't quite understand why you'd do this to me… when there's people who are better than me who'd deserve being spoiled like this so much more.” he licked his lips nervously.

“You're the ultimate lover and fantasy, John. I can't stop thinking about doing things to you that let you know I worship the ground you walk on - heck I DO more or less think you're that your perfection and I'm not good enough to make you feel like a prince.” Gordon confessed.

“I don't have anything to offer you in return.” he added. “Not much to look at, heck Virgil and Scott make jokes behind my back about how weird I look, Kayo and Penny think I'm a joke and was scared that if you knew you’d be like them and just laugh at me.”

Gordon swallowed hard. “I couldn't tell if what happened that day was real...if I had imagined it because I didn't think anyone would come for me - and the rest was just delirium. But you've let me just worship you in the only way I've wanted to for so long…. To not have you push me away at that first kiss to live out that weird dream….”

“I love you… I always have….oh fudge monkeys I can't believe I'm ruining everything right now! B-but I still can't get my head around it - how you can like me back the same way without….”

John sat up a little as he listened to Gordon quietly start explaining his more personal thoughts and feelings. His insecurity about his own body... all he could ever see was something scrawny but John saw chiselled and polished marble. His brother had been gifted with such a perfect body – not too bulky or too shapeless but just right. Man... John would kill to have a body as nice as his. The tan on that beautiful skin too... that was something else. While John had the paleness of the moon, Gordon had been graced to be kissed by the sun every time he stepped outside.

All of a sudden, he was starting to feel more protective of his little brother. How dare the others tease and make fun of their water loving sibling? Sure, Gordon might not have always been into the same things, or had the same point of views but he was as much a Tracy as anyone else in the family. 

“You should give yourself more credit.” John replied softly after a while, taking his hand and started to soothingly rub his palm. “You might not see it yourself but your body is beautiful, Gordon. You have worked so hard to build up a strong frame, one that deserves to be shown off at every moment because your undivided attention and dedication makes it seem so much more amazing. You deserve the world and all its oceans at the very least, purely because you mean so much. Your skin... your skin has been kissed by the sun over and over to create a flawless, perfect tan – a vision that could compete against the sun itself.”

He scooted himself off of the bed and pulled Gordon to the edge, so he could give Gordon a soft kiss before continuing.

“I love you so much for your charms and personality, not just your looks. You may be cheeky and silly but you can go right back to professional and ready at a moment's notice. You put others first before yourself and not just on the job. You strive to see other people happy and free, just as you like to portray yourself and strive to be and that is so admirable Gordon. If others judge you based on just your surface, your looks, then they're not worth the time you give them. Trust me.” 

“Ditto.” Gordon said smiling after letting out a snort. “Don't you ever dare think you're not important. Sometimes, you're the only thing standing between insanity and chaos and being left to aimlessly wander alone. You're forever looking out for us even when we don't deserve or seem to appreciate it….sometimes I wonder why you you keep doing so.”

He kissed him on the lips before running both his hands through his hair and cradling his older sibling's head. “I suck at the right words but maybe I don't need them to let you know I love you.”

And with that he pulled John into a passionate kiss and guided him back on top of him, only parting long enough to regain a breath of air before going for another long exploration with his tongue.

“I don't care if anyone sees us….” Gordon breathed out as he nuzzled and nibbled one of his brother's ears. “There's nothing anyone can do to make me stop loving you.”

John was pretty taken aback by the sudden, though rather welcomed passion-filled kiss that Gordon lured him back in with. He was lowered down towards the bed, but his feet were still planted on the floor and he was more than happy to make full use of that advantage. A muffled chuckle and a soft moan followed Gordon's comment about exposure. Of course he wouldn't care if anyone were to see him, but John felt protective – that only his brother should be his to see. 

Gordon started to strip John's open shirt down off and taste his beautiful olive skin, while shifting his own legs so he lay his pelvis against his own, feeling the new wave of excitement that was coursing through his brother's body against his own naked and hot throbbing member which still held onto his excitement - only just - the way his voice caramelized words like the sweetest syrup was enough to keep him begging for attention off him or at least give it back in spades.

Which is what he intended to do. 

“But what if they shouldn’t see because they don't deserve to be graced with such a view?” John breathed in between kisses, “Surely I should get to keep what’s precious safe at all costs...” Gordon was removing his top now, slow and purposefully. The soft fabric that was best used for sleeping in slipped off of his shoulders like butter slipped around a hot pan. He was being held with soft kisses so his attention was temporarily off of Gordon's treasures, however that wasn't going to be the case for long. John was a brave explorer and the precious treasures were going to be his. 

Gordon peeled his older brother's arms free from his top while giggling playfully inbetween kisses and purposely making sure his naked lower half brushed teasingly against his siblings clothes and letting out little whimpers as he begged for John to finish what he started.

“Ahhhhhhh uhhhhh….” Gordon purred, sexual interest and intent dripping off every sound he uttered. “Come on Orion, the hunter of my heart. Capture me, your delicious prey.” he teased, a smile spreading across his face like wildfire. “I’ll be your untamed beast if you'll let me.”

“Come here you...” he growled possessively, feeling even more excited than ever at Gordon's new pet name for him, “I'll take you in no time at all... and you'll be begging for more...” With that promise in place, he quickly removed the last items of clothing that still lay on his brother's person. He leant down in between Gordon's thighs to give his top a quick kiss before looking back up at him, just about peering over him, eyelashes fluttering like an innocent schoolboy.

“Mmm?” Gordon continued to tease by resting one of his legs on his brother’s shoulders. “What are you planning on doing to me?” he grinned deviously. He knew what his brother was going to do and was curious if it was going to feel as good as it was being able to do it to him earlier this evening.

“I think you know exactly what I’m going to do to your Gordon...” John purred, letting the soft vibrations fall onto his tip. He watched as his little brother shuddered under him, drinking up the view that he had bestowed to him. 

Even now, Gordon could still taste John’s fluids on his lips, the light tangy taste strong enough to still linger on his tongue despite all the soft vanilla kisses.

His breath caught in his throat as he arched back, using his leg to maintain a grip on his brother as he started to feel the shudders course through his body, warm and intoxicating. He had to be careful not to get too excited - he couldn’t control any involuntary movements and last thing he wanted was to kick or knee his sibling as he lost every ounce of power he had over his body.

It was hard. He wanted to cum very badly, the pressure was building up really fast under the attention and every breath he took was short, sharp and full of excited whimpers, begging for more.

John’s tongue flicked over the tip some more, playing and lapping up any droplets of the fluids that were a result from Gordon’s excitement but he didn’t want his brother to feel like he had to hold it in. HE deserved the best feelings in the world, not pain from being loved. 

He could tell Gordon was so close though and quietly decided that he had had enough teasing for the time being. His position from standing against the bed was that he had better access to his bedside table, which he opened and took out a small bottle from. John was quick and methodical to prepare his fingers and still while Gordon was none the wiser, he gave his inner thigh a kiss and pressed his fingertip into his brother. Now he was grinning like a cheeky schoolboy but he couldn’t help it if Gordon was looking so precious and ecstatic.

Gordon felt something slender pushed into him while he was being played with and it made his hips buck upwards and in desperation to muffle his loud voice he grabbed the sheets and chomped down hard as another warm and wet slender thing entered alongside the first.

It wasn’t long before John worked his second finger into Gordon, all the while giving his brother little kisses around his thighs and lower legs. Each kiss was more delicate than the last, as if he was worth a million and more. 

Oh fuck - Gordon's body was going insane with shivers of ecstasy, his brain had no control over the feeling of oragasm washing over him like one giant sneeze that was centered all down below. His entire body was involved in the motions as his hips moved without warning as everything escaped him. The extra sensations though after he had released continued however and due to his body letting go of so much energy, the feelings were overwhelming. He had let go of the sheet at this point from his jaws and was tugging it tightly in his hands as an extra release valve as John continued to playfully tease.

He helped Gordon through his orgasm with all the love and affection he had, leaning down to whisper in his ear how much he loved him and how beautiful he looked on the bed the way he did.

The sensations Gordon was come down from were eased off but not for long. Something longer and thicker took it’s place. 

“Nuhhh! Ah! Uh… John! Ah! UhhhhhhAH!”

It was with those words that he smoothly eased himself fully inside of his brother, letting out a loud moan and started to give Gordon needy kisses, waiting until he hoped his brother was ready and worked up a rhythm. 

“Ah! Uhhhhh Ah!” Gordon purred and whimpered as his body moved in time with his sibling. He was enjoying it way too much to care about being caught now, inhibitions thrown well and truly out the window sometime ago. Sure he was spent but he still had enough energy to give his brother a bit more of a run and the longer he was inside, the faster Gordon’s own body had reset and was rubbing hard against his stomach and his brother's, the pressure and friction along with his brothers strong and meaningful thrusts brought him to another release, sticking them together.

Gordon’s senses were on overload. He could smell how delicious John was up close, taste how wonderful his lips and his skin is and hear how beautiful his voice sounded out of breath and growling predatory sexuality into his ears.

Still he kept going. He wanted to last as long as his older brother and if it meant he was worked up into more than two orgasms then damn - he'd risk it. It was possible after a short period to get aroused again for a third but he wasn't a woman who could have them one after another if they learned how. The way John was going through and how much his body was overloaded with pleasure, that wait time wasn't going to be long before he came again with more energy spent than the last.

John wasn’t going to be able to last much longer. He’d barely started anything and yet he wasn’t going to be able to last. He really hoped Gordon didn’t mind to much…

“I.. I love…you..” he whispered breathlessly, keeping the rhythm going as best as he could, shifting one leg so it rested on the bed and he didn’t literally fall out from how weak and jelly-like they were starting to feel. “I love you so.. so much and I really don’t think I’m going to…uhhh…mmm.. I love you so much… you look so beautiful right now… ”

“John…” Gordon struggled to breathe out in between gasps. “I love you too.”

 

One or two more rocks of his hips was all it took John, before he himself followed Gordon to through the mind shattering, bone melting end. He practically crashed his lips onto his brothers and pressed himself in as far as he could possibly go – all the air in his lungs disappearing like nothing ever before. 

His limbs shook violently for a moment or two and he held himself as best as he could, temporarily plugging Gordon before slowly pulling out and rearranging both of them so he could curl up and sleep peacefully with his little brother. He reached out to play with the soft blonde hair, feeling it with the similar awe of a small child fascinated by a cuddly toy... but then again, his little brother was like a precious cuddly teddy for John and he loved him so much.


	3. Uncalled for interruption

Gordon was beginning to dislike waking up alone, though this time he wasn't in his own bed. He was tangled up in the deep purple and royal blue sheets on John's spacious double bed surrounded in the delightful scent of his older sibling on everything as he nuzzled into them for warmth. He was feeling a bit better - which meant he was probably going to end up rostered back on for duties before he was fully ready - Scott having a no man is down unless they're on their deathbed policy.

Shuffling out into the hallway he could hear water running from the end of the hall. 

The bathroom was opposite Alan’s bedroom and next to Gordon's before it lead up another two flights of stairs to the guest bedrooms of the round house where Brains and Kayo had taken over two of the three rooms with their own ensuites for their own while the boys all had to share the one.

It was a big enough bathroom, all five of them had crammed in there at once on more than one occasion for laughs but now they were older they just rolled with the notion that at any point in time there was always at least one or two Tracy's using it at the same time - or three on the rare occasion when one was in the shower, another in the bath and someone having a shave. Privacy in a house with five siblings was a thing that didn't exactly exist and no matter how big their father built the house, the boys were going to have to butt heads in co-existence regardless which for a few years just between rebellious and thrill seeking junkie Scott, I demand solitude at all times Virgil and warm hearted prankster and master of mayhem John was a nightmare.

Even though there wasn't much of an age gap between Virgil and Gordon he never had to worry about fighting for the bathroom. John didn't care if Gordon or Alan where in there when he was and both the youngest and himself never had much of a reason to hog it for themselves - Alan still at sixteen having other things in his life that more than gave him an adrenaline rush that for now was better than sex and Gordon had been lucky enough that he was so finely covered in light blonde hairs for the moment he could get away without shaving for a few weeks before anyone noticed he had a fine layer of fuzz.

That'd have to change… John might not like that unshaven feel as much as Gordon loved how ‘rough’ it made him look.

Besides, Gordon could just sneak out in his submarine for a while if he was desperate for alone time.

He wandered into the bathroom and half expected to bump into Scott or Virgil at this time of morning but was pleasantly surprised to see John steaming up the shower.

Something stirred inside. He had a sneaky idea.

“…and I see colours in a different way. You make what doesn’t matter fade to grey…” The good thing about being an early riser through habit was that John could have the shower to himself and not have to rush giving himself a good shower. Sure Thunderbird 5 had a shower cubicle but it was nowhere near the same as a good proper shower that actually had hot water coming out of the showerhead. 

Another good thing about being an early riser was that if he was in the shower, he could quietly sing to himself while the rest of the house was asleep and therefore not be caught out by anyone who might have the idea of sitting him with Virgil and singing along to piano tunes.

“…I think you and the moon and Neptune got it right…” Picking up the peach shower gel, he hummed the rest of the song to himself as he began to lather and freshen himself up. The sweet smelling peach drifted around the shower room with the steam, leaving the surrounding smelling as sweet and as fragrant as the spaceman himself. 

Gordon watched the shower glass fog over and listened to his brother’s voice. Wow he sounded really good! Though he ALWAYS sounded great when he used to sing them lullabies as toddlers and since he rarely sung anymore having him read books to you when you were unwell was the closest you could get to listening to the soothing melodies his voice could produce.

What he was about to do was going to make that beautiful tune stop but hopefully it was all worth it.

John was still quietly humming to himself as he took the bar of plain soap and began to wash his face, feeling pleased that his voice was finally on the mend. He racked his brains and picked up another tune to hum along to while paying attention to making his skin squeaky clean. He really should see if there’s a way to play music in the shower room without getting any electricals splashed. Showering would be a lot more enjoyable and would help in waking up. Hot water was nice against the skin, but it had a way to just lull him back to the land of sleep sometimes. Of course, he wasn’t alone for all that long. 

Gordon had stripped out of his sleepwear and picked up the spare loafer by the bath and squeezed a bit of minty shower gel onto it - it probably belonged to either Alan or Virgil - both of them preferring the relaxation of a good long soak in the tub to standing on legs of jelly in the shower.

It didn’t bother Gordon which one he had - as long as the water was hot he didn’t care heck he’d fallen asleep at the bottom of the shower when he couldn’t hack it anymore and a bath was just too dangerous to have.

He slid the glass door open as quietly as he could, though the power of the shower was enough to drown the sound out as it rattled a little on closing and while his brother’s back was facing him, he pressed the loafer up against the skin on this brother’s shoulders.

Out of the corner of his eye John saw the shower panel slide shut and only a few seconds later felt a hard sponge press against his shoulder blades. It made him tense up a little and put the soap down, washing the suds out of his face and slicking his fiery hair out of his eyes before shifting around to find out who was there.

“Morning.” Gordon smiled deviously. “Can I help?”

John chuckled a little and reached up to angle the showerhead better so his brother had some water splashing down onto him. “Depends on what you’d want to help with.” He smiled, watching as the water trickled down Gordon’s front. “Did you sleep well?”

“I probably would have slept all day if you stayed beside me.” Gordon admitted, slowly swirling the loafer across his older brother’s chest. Damn there was downsides to being short sometimes however being squished together in the small stall allowed him a better reach around to his sibling’s back where he snaked his other hand around to rest in the center of while he playfully soaped John up like he had seen in some movie before. Hard to recall which - so many of them had scenes like this these days.

“A lazy day does sound good indeed, however the growing pile of work would try and disagree with me.” John smiled, leaning down carefully in the shower to give his younger squid a morning kiss. 

He almost purred at Gordon’s snaking arm wrapping around his back and with one softened and slightly pruned hand, he cupped his hand just under the flow of the water, redirecting it so it began to soak Gordon’s sandy hair, watching with amusement as the longer strands started to glue to his face, before he reached with his second hand to brush them out of the way.

A grin reminiscent of wildfires graced Gordon’s face as he started to run the loafer lower and carefully lathered up his brothers hardening body, eventually doing away with it to use his own hand, the extra slipperiness of soap and water allowing his movements to be slicker and faster without hurting his sibling as he stroked his member and varied his pace between slow and purposeful to fast and flighty.

The other hand was brought back around so John could lean back against the foggy glass and allow him to move one of his legs higher around his own waist so he could press and teasingly rub his own erect pelvis under him, till he was granted permission.

He hoped John would.

Ooh... this was nice. Gordon’s hands seemed to work like magic and in response John's head seemed to fall backwards in pleasure. Blimey, all this excitement and they're barely said hello, let alone start the battle of affections. 

He was suddenly very thankful that the glass around the shower was extremely hard to crack, as in the back of his mind, something suggested it would not hold their combined weight should be need to use it, however as Gordon buttered him up more, the easier John just seemed to collapse against the steamed-up glass. 

“Uuhh... mmm... Gordon...” John purred out, wrapping his long spindly arms around his little brother's shoulders and clinging onto him like a koala bear, “Take me however you want to...” 

Gordon kissed his siblings wet skin and started to lick it playfully before replying. “My pleasure.” 

He hitched his sibling's leg a little higher so he could get his hips in closer and teased with more kisses to distract John enough that the slight initial pain would be ignored so the best parts can be enjoyed.

John wrapped his arms slightly tighter around Gordon and tried to kiss him back as much as he could when he felt the intrusion. While it luckily didn’t hurt, the sensations were new and unknown, and he felt as inexperienced and as vulnerable as a teenager. He wasn’t doing this alone though, as he had his brother right with him, keeping a steady hold on him. Even with hardly any playing beforehand, he knew that he wasn't going to last an awful lot longer if Gordon kept up his teasing the way he did.

Gordon let out a mild grunt and readjusted his brother's leg again - thank goodness he was strong enough to do this though truth be told if push came to shove Gordon could carry John piggy back and race Alan up the stairs at the same time - which seemed to keep slipping from his grip from the soap on his hands. 

He growled a little as he felt his body be squeezed a bit as his sibling shifted, his slender form arching off the glass as he let out a gasp of air and as his neck was exposed he kissed it, nibbled and nuzzled reassuringly to let him know that it was going to be ok. Sure his sibling was a little tight but he never had anyone do this to him before - so Gordon assumed with how he reacted.

“Does it feel ok?” he asked quietly. “You feel beautiful to me….your wonderfully warm and snug. You really envelop me.”

“G..Gordon...” John whimpered, voice hitching a little. “P..Please...”   
He had to bite his lip to quieten down a little and bring himself under some kind of control, so he rested his head on his arms wrapped around Gordon's shoulders. John couldn’t feel fuller; never felt fuller in his whole life.   
His voice was so quiet now, probably even quieter than the sound of the water as he started to continue. “G..Gordon... pl...please... please continue...”

“Are you sure? You don't sound ok with this.” Gordon was concerned. “It's ok if you're not, we could try another time.” admittedly right here and now being all wet made this far easier to do but if his brother didn't enjoy it then he was happy to put a stop to it. Afterall not everyone liked the extra intensity that spot gave them and while he himself just loved the feeling of melting and falling to pieces, John might not like the idea of losing control of anything his body was doing. “Or we can just stay like this a little, I make you feel good by just playing and pull out once you've relaxed. I don't have to move or anything, just let you get used to it….we can try properly when you're comfortable next time.”

Gordon kissed his brother's lips. “Don't worry about me, I just want to pleasure you.”

John wanted to continue and make Gordon finish what he started but when he couldn't find the right words to explain, he experimentally clenched around his little brother, trying to entice him to stay and continue.

He lifted up his head a little when Gordon brought him up for a kiss and snakes one hand up from around his shoulders to play with his wet hair. Even thoroughly soaked, it still was easy to weave his hand through having been free of knots. 

Was he going to have to beg more to make Gordon continue?

Gordon let out a really loud growl. He couldn't help it as his brother's body tensed around him.

“I can't if you don't rel -”

There was a banging of the bathroom door which made both of them jump, Gordon realising he was now stuck the more his older brother tensed up further and tried to muffle a yelp by burying his head into John's bare wet chest.

At the sound of footsteps, Gordon's jump made John almost cry out in unexpected pain. Who the hell would want to use the bathroom when steam was probably fogging up the entire room? 

Oh shit they were in trouble now.

John had to try and push himself off of the glass panel and flop into his younger brother, in order to allow the panel to steam up again and not arouse any suspicion. Usually, someone showering would not lean their back against the glass as they were almost out of the flow of shower water – in other words it would just be highly eyebrow raising.

There was a sound of the toilet lid being lifted and the loud tinkling that should have been drowned out by the sound of the shower but it rang horribly in Gordon's ears. He felt John try to bury himself into him in return, the two of them in sheer panic with the real fear of being caught.

Seriously!? Their damn whistling?

There was a flush and a slam of the lid and the whistling moved around the bathroom in front of the sink and there was a loud grumpy moan.

“For fuck sakes, Gordon don't damn leave your clothes lying around! Just because you've been a vegetable for four weeks doesn't give you privileges!”

Scott. Angry, annoyed, grumpy-pants Scott.

Please don't look in the mirror or come any closer!

Scott tossed the hand towel he dried his hand with at the shower and both comprised Tracy's clung together praying to any god that would hear their silent pleas.

“Hear me fish guts?! Don't leave your crap lying around! Oh and don't hog the hot water shark bait, we need to talk about that last mission you were on and why you screwed up!”

Scott sure sounded angry... but with all the work he had to do recently, John could understand. A small part of him worried at how much sleep he'd gotten recently - something the teenage John used to worry about a lot, after their mother’s untimely death.

There was a few paping sounds of frustrated feet on the tiles before the bathroom door was opened and slammed shut.

Gordon was shaking. He was in deep trouble and there was no way out of it. Even though they didn't get caught and the thrill of getting away with it was something that would enhance their testosterone in this situation, he knew he couldn't do it anymore. He had to pull out and face the lecture of his life.

John waited until he was sure the door was not going to be reopened again before he slowly let go of Gordon and looked at his sibling and gave him a kiss, trying to be as reassuring as possible. 

“...what now..?” he whispered, still fully aware that Gordon was a little too deep inside him.

“I think I better let you shower in peace. Best only one of us gets in trouble today.” Gordon said quietly before moving his body away from his siblings. “You probably should have let me freeze back in the arctic.” he let out a heavy sigh before stepping out of the shower and while still wet, picked up both sets of clothes and forgoing the only towel so John could have it, walked out into the hall to his room. It wasn’t as if anyone hadn’t seen him naked before and the trip wasn't far - just the room next door.

John watched and felt as Gordon suddenly moved away from him, leaving the fairly evident feeling of empty and thrown away. Deep down he knew he wasn’t being chucked away, at least he hoped not but the moment he heard the door close behind his brother, his knees gave way just as before and he collapsed to the bottom of the stall, using the edge as support.  
He felt even more vulnerable than before, when Gordon was trying to please him. Even then he must have looked a little pathetic – if his brother had been able to enjoy his first experience, then why couldn’t he?

Reaching out, he turned the shower so it went from piping hot to freezing cold. Better to let his excitement die down if there wasn't going to be any release – he wasn't about to try and finish himself off. The water was unbelievably cold and seemed to knife him every time a droplet came in contact with his bare skin. 

He'll worry about his health later. Right now he had to brave getting out of the shower and attempting to defuse the bomb that was Scott's morning ‘I haven't slept in a week’ wrath.

Gordon pulled on a tie-dye t-shirt which was tight, indicating he either had one of Alan's or needed new clothes and pulled on his three quarter length jeans - Gordon only chose not to go commando under his dry suit because he disliked how it felt having all his parts squashed together - and headed for the lounge where Scott the king of the grumps was going to be, with a chance that Alan, Virgil or Brains was in the room to provide him with an audience to be humiliated infront of.

Scott liked using him as an example whenever he got a chance.

He wasn't disappointed. Alan was reading a comic book in the couch and Scott was sitting at their father's desk thumping a pen furiously against the red hardwood. He glared at Gordon as he made his way over to be torn to pieces.

“So, tell me what happened Gordon? Why had you gotten stuck in the ice out there instead of returning home once the mission was over? You realise you took John away from his duties and inconvenienced us for almost a whole month?! What the hell were you doing?”

Gordon opened and shut his mouth a few times. How could he explain to Scott he needed to surface to refill his air tanks when his is the only craft that didn't have a recirculated air supply? What was the point trying to tell him that when he tried to go back under the ice had solidified around the submarine so much it would cause damage and be dangerous if he submerged? He wouldn't have been standing infront of the desk to be lectured that was for certain. The pressure of the ocean would have crumpled him alive inside the craft and killed him somewhere on the return trip if he was that reckless.

Scott was still talking and it was falling on deaf ears. Gordon just tuned him out and was thinking that maybe he should have been a Tracy with a death wish - Scott would have been more angry that he killed himself doing what he was supposed to. 

He kept thinking about John and how lucky he was to be alive because of his older brother. There was never going to be anything he could do that could repay that...he was going to be in his debt forever.

Gordon’s ears pricked up when he realised Scott’s tone of voice changed.

“Wait what?” Gordon frowned, finally paying attention.

“I said Penelope is having a high tea evening in England and has requested for one of us to be her date and we volunteered you to go.”

“Your joking.”

“No.” Scott shook his head. 

“Don't you have feelings for her?”

“Not as much as she has for you, but I’m sure once you and her are all comfortable again in each other's company…..” Scott's voice trailed off.

“Oh no no no no no…. No way Scott.”

“Why not Gordon?” Scott's brow raised. “You were chasing after her for a while. What changed? Surely you can reignite that desire to please her?”

Gordon’s jaw hung open. The only reason he ever chased after her was to get his brother's off his back about not being interested in woman. If Scott and Virgil knew he wasn’t straight they'd do everything in their power to prove to him he really was.

“Regardless, now you're walking around we'll be able to tell her you're available.” he grinned as he stood up and patted his younger brother on the shoulder.

“Why can't you?”

“She's not of my type.” Scott lied.

“Oh so you're saying she's not a porn star with the face of a bull mastiff?”

Gordon felt fingernails dig into his shoulder. “Watch it fish guts. I can make your life hell.”

“So how's that any different to now?”

“Egh, I should have left Virgil to do this.” Scott snorted before leaning down over Gordon threateningly. “You going to this tea thing with Penny whether you want to or not.”

“What a load of crap that you can't go your fucki-”

Scott shook life back into his hand. “You haven't got a say in the matter Gordon. Get used to it.” he said before walking away towards the kitchen stairs while leaving his younger sibling clutching his jaw.

Gordon looked up to catch Alan quickly glancing back at his comic. He had witnessed everything, which meant Gordon wasn't going to be able to worm his way out of it.

He was about to make his escape when Alan put down his comic and said; “You sound like you don't want to go? You and Penny fight or something?”

“Er no… I'm just not really into her….that way.” Gordon’s voice trailed off.

“Oh? Since when?” Alan sat upright all interested. “Though you have sort of stopped chasing after her the last few years….what happened? Realised she was out of your league?”

“No, nothing like that Alan. I'm just…” he turned back to walk towards his younger brother and sat in the floorboards, dangling his legs into the cutout where the couch was that Alan sat at.

He let out a little cough, looked around the lounge to make sure they were alone before continuing. “What I tell you stays between us ok? Promise me Alan?”

Alan held out his pinky finger and Gordon took it with his own in a silent pinky swear. “Ok so you just what? Into someone else? Oohhh is it Kayo?”

“Huh? No! She's into Virgil!” Gordon reeled back a little. “Besides - EWWW!” he poked out his tongue. 

“Ew? Heh maybe, I mean there's more attractive guys than Virgil right!?” Alan laughed. “She'd be better with one of us!”

Gordon looked surprised for a moment before awkwardly laughing along. “With you maybe, though she is my age.”

“Hmm? What you don't think she's pretty?”

“Of course she's pretty! So’s Penny - That's not the point!” Gordon hissed.

Alan frowned and when it finally dawned on him he almost shouted, “Since WHEN are you gay Gordon?"

“SHHH!” Gordon hissed. “Not so loud. You know what will happen if Scott and Virgil found out!”

“Cut your balls off? Aw come on you know they won't-”

“Wanna bet?” Gordon raised a questioning eyebrow. “Virgil jokes but I've seen what he's like when he's angry. Both are homophobic at least - I know Virgil certainly is…. I work with him alot remember? Me saying I'm gayer than a tree full of monkeys is different to say…. I dunno John saying it I guess. Virgil will really hurt me if he knew.”

“Ok so I won't say anything.” Alan said quietly. “So when did you first know?”

"Since before I took back to the hotel a stripper from that night club at Brains’s bachelor party."

"Wait, I though Scott and Virgil said it was a woman?"

"Seriously Alan; Scott, Virgil, John and Brains were so pissed that night I could have taken a sheep back to the hotel and fucked it all night long as much as they cared."

"But you drank too right? You do around here sometimes."

"We're under different laws here Alan. American drinking age is 21 and I was only 20. The only highlight of that entire night was watching them four get shit faced, putting money down some girls knickers and me sneaking off with the handsome fella who served them all drinks at the booth. Trust me Alan I think I remember that night more clearly than any other."

Listening to Gordon's tale, no matter how strange it suddenly was, seemed to make everything else make more understandable. Alan himself definitely wasn’t homophobic, and neither was he about to change how he acted around Gordon just because knew he was gay. Of course he was a little disappointed, but only because he hoped that he and Gordon would be able to go out and help each other pick up girls to try and befriend and get to know in case they were possible love interests. 

However, it wasn’t like Gordon would go lusting after him or anything - that was ridiculous thinking, surely. If Gordon had already picked up a guy in the past, it suggested that Gordon knew his type and knowing Alan's luck, he definitely wasn't the type. He's never anyone’s type…

It still didn’t sit right, though, this apparent confession Gordon made.   
“Ok but, first off, why use John as an example for comparison if you were to out to the rest of us? Do you know something about Johnny we don't?” he suddenly gasped and lowered his voice more, “Is John gay as well??”

Gordon froze and then was quick to recover. “Not that I'm aware of, though have to admit he's never been interested in either so who would really know?” he half lied. Telling Alan about John would be a double whammy and finding out they were having sex just a few hours before wasn't something he was going to admit publicly. He knew incest was wrong and didn't want John being the one in trouble because he was the eldest and knew better.

Besides - how much could he tell Alan anyway without getting into trouble? The fact everyone knew Gordon had sex even before Scott and the others already left a bad taste in the older brother's mouths for two years since Brains had gotten married and now at 22 it was if between Virgil and Scott it was a competition to pair him off with any single female they knew. He figured they were placing bets on it.

Secondly he couldn't dob on John. Gordon knew that there was tons of reasons people stayed in the closet and right now he wasn't entirely sure how much he was in love with him. Gordon loved him to bits and would happily tie his own feet in cement and drown if John wanted to keep him a secret because he loved him that much…..however he had no idea how much of that John felt in return. His brother needed time to spend with him not pinned down in bed sicker than a killer whale in sea world before he could honestly say his feelings were not just because Gordon was a vegetable.

That and if he knew that night it wasn't a lady… why didn't he ever ask about it? Gordon suspected John might think he bats for both teams and is only chasing him for convenience which wasn't true….. but Gordon knew the fear of dying alone made him confess and there was hundreds of ways John could read into that and most of them ended in heartbreak.

Gordon hoped he'd never find out what they were.

He must have been zoned out too long as Alan was clicking his fingers in front of his face trying to get his attention.

“I suppose so,” Alan agreed, “Though he’s gotta remember to be wary, not all people like a guy who's as passionate about his work the way John is.” 

He huffed a little, still slightly down at the thought that Gordon was again somehow the center of all his brother's attentions and he was kicked to the side, just like a backup player who never ends up getting called to the pitch.

“So, what exactly was this guy like then? What did he look like? And.. uh.. what exactly did you do with him? ‘Cause... just hooking up with some random person isn't the best idea. You used protection, right?” 

Alan might have been younger, but he certainly wasn't stupid, not by a long shot. He waited for Gordon's response, slightly concerned and frustrated by how long the pause was. Surely Gordon knew the basic principles of keeping himself safe. He himself barely had any sort of sex ed, and still he knew what to do. 

“Hey, Earth to Thunderbird Four, are you listening?” 

“Huh? Er sorry, what was the question?”

Alan rolled his eyes and repeated himself.

“Uh….you really want to know what happened that night? Are you sure?” Gordon was a little surprised.

“Well yeah, I'd like to know, because I doubt I'm ever going to be in a situation where I'm having one night stands... that is, if it was a one night stand?” 

“Yeah… it was a one night stand.” Gordon caved and looked a bit disappointed in himself. “You got to understand though Alan, I've been having to lie about myself for a long time and pretend I'm just like them….then that night after watching them make fools of themselves slipping money into ladies garters for dances I just - look, I was all on my own at the bar, the guy that was serving us drinks was not only cute but really friendly and above all else - nice to me.” he let out a heavy sigh.

“We got to talking and eventually I left on my own and at the door I bumped into him as his shift had finished so we decided to leave together and talk more…. And then one thing lead to another flirting wise and we were back at the hotel and I was having sex the whole night with a stranger and I'm not going to lie - it felt good to be free to just be myself and I figured at the time it would be probably the only time I'd ever get laid in my entire life.” Gordon quickly glanced around the room before continuing, making sure it was still safe to spill his gut out all over the place.

“I learned alot about myself that night…what I really liked, how to please another person, stuff you can't learn until you try it… we never kissed though - it was just sex and it wasn't the safe kind either but that's ok,” he held his hands up in defence, “I was panicking horribly afterwards but the amount of accidents I've had since then I'm certain If I had anything awful from that night Brains and Moffy would have found it by now.”

Gordon leaned down and spoke with a whisper in Alan's ear. “Not one living soul is allowed to know this ok? I regret so many things in my life already, it's one of the few things that while everyone will make me feel shit over - I'll never regret being able to be free for just one night and no matter how you look at it - no one will ever understand.”

Alan listened, at, to what sounded like a confession-styled response to what happened the night of the party. Of course it still concerned him that his closest brother in age – his partner in crime – had pretty much given himself away to some random, but he trusted Gordon's sense of trust and judgement. If he had been ok with it all, then it was good enough for Alan to get to grips with.

He picked up a cushion from the sofa and hugged it a little, pondering over what Gordon explained and carefully choosing what next to say.   
“If you want to keep it between us, that’s fine.” Alan smiled eventually, trying to ease his immediately older brother. “You we’re happy with this, and you weren't in any way at a disadvantage because you couldn't drink.”   
He paused again to choose what to say next.

“If you wanted to have more time to be you... did you ever try to get in contact with this guy you uh... took back to your room? It might have been a one night thing, but if you both became friends... maybe it would give you a chance to get some time away from home to be yourself more. Hell, you'd sure be lucky if you had that opportunity. Scott and Virgil might be grouches, but they would never deny you time if you said you were visiting a friend you haven't seen in awhile, right?”

“No… not a good idea… besides two years is gone… doubt they'd remember, anyway I've got someone I'm interested in.”

“You met someone else?” Alan sounded surprised but it was of the good kind, “Who's this mystery person then?”

 

Gordon realised he said too much. “You know them.” was all he said before sighing. “Look, better go find out more about this high tea thing and maybe try and find some sort of suit. Unlike you I can't just borrow Scott’s or John's clothes and look like a million dollars… the less said about Virgil's oversized ones the better.”

He stood up and left the living room leaving Alan to ponder away. He had to find grandma and see if she could do a last minute fix up job on one of dad's old dress outfits in regards to hemlines.


	4. Truth comes out

“Hope the water wasn't too cold for you, Ziggy.” he said jovially. “Hey, if you're still under the weather you don't have to rush to be back on duty. Gill breath is fine so maybe you can finally rest without worrying about him.” 

It had only been... 10 minutes, and yet Scott was already back in the sleeping areas of the villa, catching John in a short, skimpy-looking towel wrapped just enough to cover himself up nicely and still appear to be an object of desire to a certain aquanaut. He jumped and spun around, trying to rearrange the towel around his waist so it looked a little more decent, and zoned right in front of his big brother.

Scott snorted and rubbed his foot in the floorboards. “Seriously though, don't know why you bother - ok so you worry about EVERYONE till you've made yourself sick but frankly it's wasted on Gordo. He’s lazy, arrogant doesn't do what he's told and is going to kill himself by accident one day.” he scratched his nose before leaning on the wall of the hallway. “Hopefully you won't have to soon though, Penny has this high tea charity thing for single ladies and asked if any of us were single to be put up in the auction as eligible bachelors for a week of sexual slavery to the highest bidder. She's got a few blokes lined up but wanted one of us to.”

Scott then laughed. “Have you seen some of those ladies though? Most of them are older, plumper and not attractive! She insisted though and there's no way in hell me and Virgil would do it and you're clearly as gay as a poster of Kylie Minogue so we dobbed Gordon in as, let's face it he did have sex with a female stripper on Brains’s bucks night, perfect candidate for getting it off with some ugly stranger.” He shrugged his shoulders “What else is he good for anyway other than a boy toy? No way he’ll ever be a real man.”

Sexual slavery? 

What was Scott saying now?

He zoned back in and started to feel a little faint at what was unravelling. Gordon was going to be auctioned off for a week of most likely pure HELL and Scott was grinning about it.

“Scott... Scott is that actually wise an idea?” John muttered, looking at his brother to try and see if he could reason with him. “Gordon doesn't deserve that at all. He might be older than Alan, but just about. It would be just as bad as auctioning off Alan, which I know you wouldn't do..” he trailed slightly and offered a slight smile.

“Have you talked about it with Gordon..? Because uh... I doubt he'll be ok with this... and I'm sure that... uh... I'm required to partake in some charity events, having missed the last 7 due to being on rotation...” 

Scott rolled his eyes. “Get real John, you're skinnier than an eel and paler that an UHU stick. As for Alan he's similar to you - toast rack on stilts even if he was begging me to go when Penny called. Besides the drowned rat has been chasing after her for years, maybe Penny might make an offer herself and make the bidding interesting.”

John sighed as he listened to Scott's turn ups. Of course he wanted to just get back at Gordon for wanting to chase after Penny, and just like that, a quietly bubbling hopeful nervousness inside him that Gordon would come and finish off what he tried to start dwindled out. 

“He isn't just limited to one person his whole life Scott,” John quietly reminded, “People who might hold affections come and go. Maybe the reason Gordon quit on trying is because he no longer really held that same affection he used to have for her. It happens to all of us sometimes.”

“Maybe but do you seriously think Gordon’s ever going to be that special someone? I doubt it. Virgil has more of a chance with Kayo than Gordon ever getting anyone other than a hooker.”

 

“You never know Scott, Gordon might one day turn around and introduce us all to someone else, that isn't a uh.. hooker. He doesn't have to showcase his love life if he doesn’t want to, just like nobody else has to.” 

He shifted again, trying to awkwardly maneuver the towel around so it didn’t cause an unnecessary flashing; though right about now John was more than happy to put himself back into full clothes and keep them on for the rest of eternity... 

Would Gordon seriously want him though? Scott was always one who spoke sense and knowledge about the rest of them, and it was no lie that he resembled a toast rack due to his lack of Earth-side exercise.

“Whatever.” Scott snorted before heading off into his room.

John watched until his brother was out of sight before making a beeline for his bedroom. The doorway, however, revealed already too much. The sheets were rumpled and not by sleeping in them, there were clothes thrown around like discarded ideas, and the stuffed turtle still lay at the top of the bed, with a stain from the night before. 

Stepping into his own earthside domain, John began to work around, walking across the deep blue carpet and picking up colourful clothes that had been either chucked down from before, or which had been purposefully discarded during his and Gordon's passionate love-making. His own clothes were hazardously thrown into the wardrobe, while Gordon's pyjamas that had been removed were folded neatly on the side and ready to be returned to their rightful owner.

The bed sheet was neatened and straightened,and the pillows were rearranged so it looked presentable and offered a comfortable place to lie down and read.

The turtle was going to have to be returned to Gordon as well. He knew it was his brother's favourite, which was why he was hugging it the night before. Means of comfort, something John sometimes felt compelled to ignore when in the line of duty.


	5. Vulnerable

Gordon caught the reflection of Virgil standing behind him as he tried folding the arms up on one of dad’s shirts. “Come to gloat?”

“Uh What's with the suit?”

Gordon spun around. “You mean to tell me you don't know about Scott’s messed up little plan? That would be a first.”

“Oh! The auction!” Virgil said aloud.

“Auction?” The younger Tracy frowned. “What auction? Am I supposed to be a date that hangs on her arm while she bids money on more paintings of ugly pugs?” Gordon cocked his head to one side. Maybe this wasn't a real date after all and he was just to look like arm candy and that was probably the extent if it. If that was the case, he could survive doing that for one night, as it involved not talking to party guests and eating free food.

“Er….maybe?” Virgil said scratching his head.

“Ok so what the hell is going on!?” Gordon snapped. “If you rather be going instead of me then your damn welcome!” His shirt sleeves rolled down as he thrusted his arm wide in a wild gesture. “I’d rather not go! There's other things I could be doing!”

“Like what? Maintenance on your submarine? We had to do that for you since you were a vegetable for four weeks.” Virgil grunted. “No I'm here as what you're supposed to wear to this shindig arrived from London and I'm curious to see what it looks like.”

“Wait, so I don't wear my own suit?”

“Nooo…” Virgil grinned evilly. “When we said it was you going Penny asked for your measurements for a costume. Fancy dress she said.”

“Oh great, it's probably some over puffy Georgian era crap isn't it? I hate rich people's idea of fun outfits.”

“I dunno, the package is pretty small.” Virgil handed Gordon a small box.

Gordon’s brow knotted when he saw was inside. “Is this some kind of joke?”

“If it is it's a wasted one.” Virgil started laughing. “Oh look! Those are real diamonds in the cuffs and the collar! And that bell looks like it's pure crystal! Wow she spared no expense when it came to you though honesty I think she's trying way too hard to polish a turd.”

“Where's the rest of it?”

“I think that's just it Gordo. I think you're expected to go in your birthday suit with baby blue trimmings.”

“Fuck that!” Gordon growled.

“I think that's the idea, though with all your scars and tattoos I reckon you'd be lucky to get one bid! Though who knows with ritch birds maybe they like a bad boy? Though it's obvious your a try hard.”

“You know what? You can take this, this creepy party and shove it up far up your arse-”

His back was thumped against the nearest wall and was lifted off the ground. “You're going to wear this, go to this party and be a good little boy and do what you're told for the ladies pleasure or I'm going to bash the crap out of you.”

Gordon had already been hit hard once today, he didn't need to add broken jaw to the list of bruises the first strike had already given him. “Fine. I'll just go to my room and put it on under my clothes shall I ready for tonight?”

Virgil put him down in the floor and ruffled his hair. “There's the Gordie I love. Always willing to have an adventure.” He then ushered him out of their father's ensuite bathroom and escorted him upstairs. “Now don’t even think of escaping, I'm just down the hall and my bedroom door will be open to catch you if you do. Besides,” he indicated to the door of John’s room across the hall, “I’ll ask John to keep a secondary eye on you, just incase. Now put the damn harnesses on like a good little slave. Just think, you're in for one hell of a wild night! Enjoy it as damn it's every man's fantasy!”

Gordon watched the door to his room shut and swore, throwing the box onto the floor, spilling out it's lack of contents. There was only one person he wanted to be with and right now the wedge was being shoved in so damn hard he wasn't ever going to have the chance to pursue a relationship that he really wanted.

He sighed and picked up the collar. It was well crafted and looked like it was worth hundreds of dollars.

If only he could wear this for John and not because he was forced to for some strange lady who would be angry they bidded a fortune for a guy who isn't turned on by woman. Slowly he started to get undressed and secure the harness in place.

Virgil knocked on the door of John’s room. “Got a minute Bro?”

John looked up from the paperwork on his desk when he heard Virgil suddenly call his standard brotherly nickname. He'd been fairly absorbed in trying to let his mind focus on the words and not Gordon pinning him to the shower pane, that it took a few seconds before he realised he had to answer.

“Oh, hey Virgil,” John responded with a nod and gestured for him to come in, “What can I do for you?”

He picked up the pointed cap and secured it back onto the pen before swiveling around in his chair to face his immediate younger brother. Despite it being early in the morning, Virgil was already immaculate, with his day clothes already on and his hair gelled up as hard as a marble statue. If it wasn’t for the fact that he had to shower to hide evidence of his and Gordon's night, he himself would still have been in pajamas while working.

“Hmph, since when do you take a break John? You're as bad as Brains - work work work, never stopping to do something relaxing.” Virgil tiched. As usual he had failed to notice the model kit of a steam train John had been meticulously assembling for the past three months but when only one of you ever gets praised for creativity you tend to let it go to your head that you've got hobbies everyone likes. His brow furrowed a little. “Do you mind keeping an eye on Gordo? Just so he doesn't slip off the Island in his submarine before I drag his arse off to London for Penny’s shindig?”

“Uh... yeah, sure I can. Why? Is it for that... charity auction?” John swallowed a little in anticipation, “Why would I need to keep an eye on him?”

“Yeah, he's really going to put up a fight later but damn,” Virgil started chuckling to himself. “You should see his ‘costume’ Penny sent he has to wear when there. Once you see it you'll understand.”

“Costume?” John echoed, shifting in his seat a little, “What uh... costume?”

“Costume for the auction. It's a ladies adult event so it's to she what you got or in Gordon’s case, lack of. Eh me and Scott have a bet going actually, want in? I think he'd get oh I dunno… an offer for at least twenty pounds but Scott thinks there won't be any offers but you know how sore he is knowing we're all able to get dates and he hasn't gotten squat.”

John swallowed hard. If his imagination was anything close to the real thing.... John was not going to be able to hold himself back and will have to help Gordon give the costume a “pre-check” to make sure it worked properly.

The bet, however, was something he could tip to his favor. He had overheard the last few days about the charity event, and that Kayo was going to be attending because it sounded “exciting...” well, now he could use that and play his own chips.

“Sure, I'll join in on the bet.” He agreed, looking at Virgil. “My money... hm, I'm sure he'll get more than 20 bucks. He still works out and he's still a gold medalist swimmer...” John rattled off, pretending to think of things to back up his idea, “You never know, maybe rich ladies want to have a gold medalist swimmer in their possession...”

Virgil raised an eyebrow. “Don't forget the tattoos, Scars and his height...they all score negative on the high society card. They're all going to factor that in too. Hmmm how about I raise you three auction bids no higher than….ohhh 60 pounds? For let's say…” Virgil though a moment. “You cooking dessert for the next four weeks?” He laughed.

“You make it sound like making dessert is a bad thing Virgil. Besides, if it means Grandma can rest a little, it's still fine by me. You have a deal. 3 bids at £60 or less and I cook, more than 3 bids and over £60 then you cook.” Oh Virgil, prepare to lose this battle, he smirked.

“Actually - how about we make it match Scott’s one too? He and I have ours to have Gordon be our personal slave if either of us win - after his week of sex slavery being one of our slaves will be a picnic by comparison….throw that on top of the cooking and we got a deal.” Virgil held out his hand. “‘Course be prepared to lose as I'm going to need someone to help clean the oil vents on Two and since Gords is the only one who can get into those I'm going to make sure I win this thing.”

“You're gonna make him your slave and do that to him?” John sounded skeptical but underneath he was bubbling away with a protective jealousy. No way were his brothers going to be taking Gordon for their own. That perfect body was his and his only – not by his admission. Gordon said it himself and John was going to make sure it stayed that way.

“Sure, Let’s match that bet.”

“Excellent. Don't try bribing Parker though, Scotty’s already beaten us to that though Penny has my interests at heart as she's not as cruel but then we know what Parker thinks of Gordon.” He shook his brother's hand with his death grip and smiled like a demon. “ Be prepared to lose, Johnny boy.” he said brimming with confidence before leaving John’s room.

John matched Virgil's smirk and watched as he left. There was no way he was going to lose this, not at all. Gordon was going to be his prize and he was going to make sure he loved being his private slave.

He moved towards his bed and bent down to pick up the stained clothes, stuffed turtle and a clean pair of underwear from the bedside table. John also took the opportunity to rummage through his drawers to look for any signs of as small silver foil packet. As much as he enjoyed the experience of skin on skin, he knew that he should have probably used protection as a precaution.

He still hoped that Gordon would feel confident enough to try at taking him again. While indeed, it was unsuspecting and initially uncomfortable, the overwhelming feeling of vulnerability make John feel so excited. Being taken by surprise was definitely one thing John wanted to happen again to him. Hopefully Gordon could tell…

One of his hands betrayed him and snaked downwards to rub at the material around his crotch. No... he was going to get himself all worked up before Gordon could if he continued the way he was.

Think normal thoughts.

Although…

No! No, he had to think normal thoughts!

He can let Gordon excite him further.

A quick composing of himself and John rebalanced the pile he was taking back with both hands. Since his door was already open, he simply walked out and glanced around the corridor before heading across the corridor to his little squidlette's room. Knocking out the usual knock he used to signal that he was going to come in, John shifted the pile onto one hand and opened up the door... just in time to see Gordon make a beeline for a pillow and the wardrobe.

Bloody hell... Virgil was right. From what he saw, Gordon was breathtaking! John glanced around and hurriedly placed the pile down on a chair, before walking to the wardrobe and sliding the door open slightly.

“Hey.. Gordon, it's only me... I was told to watch over you and make sure you were ok... wanna come outta there?”

“No.” Came a growl from beneath the hanging clothes, followed by a loud squeak that sounded slightly painful. Gordon didn't want John to see him now, after putting the costume on he found thinking about John had started to make him hard and it had started to cause a problem - Gordon couldn't get the harness off. He had only ever read about cockrings online but had never felt the desire to wear one….and now it was dawning in him that's exactly what the costume was supposed to do - show him off all present and erected for display.

The embarrassing part? The long furry red fox tail attached to the back brushing his bare backside was making the sensitivity levels go through the roof meaning unless he was to jerk himself off there was no way he was getting the damn thing off.

Oh damn...hopefully John didn't see the studded diamond leash on the floor and the head band with the wiggling fox ears. If he has, then he was totally boned.

John listened to the whimpers that Gordon produced from inside the wardrobe and rested against the sliding door a little. Half of him wanted to swing the door open and intrude on Gordon's space; only the better half of him said no with the logical reasons that his brother was so self conscious of his image he'd beat him up for it.

He turned back towards the room and walked towards the box on the bed, peering in to see the remnants of tissue paper and close by, a leash and a head band.

They were going to make the biggest fool of his little brother and it was all to make him feel less positive about himself.

John will show them. He'll show them all that Gordon's body deserved and demanded at the very least respect and care.

“It's ok Gords, I want to make sure You’re going to be ok in that. The last thing we need is for you to be uncomfortable and in pain because of a charity do the others set you up for..”

Another growl came from the cupboard followed by a breathless gasp. “S-stop talking your voice isn't helping me!” Gordon admitted, almost purring it out. “Ah damn thing is tight! Uhhh d-damn!”

He tried to bite his tongue but the more he thought about his siblings warm and caring voice, the more horny he was getting and upping the intensity around his privates. Sure a little had leaked out but it was being held back by force and while not entirely unpleasant, he didn't want John to see himself begging for sexual release and comfort. He was hot in the tiny space though, it was either face the music or overheat.

He shyly stepped out of the wardrobe, his excited body sinfully betraying his nervousness, the fur tail caressing his backside and legs as he moved forcing little noises out if him he couldn’t control.

Please, don't you dare laugh - he prayed with his eyes tightly shut.

John waited for what felt like ages, when in reality it was only a few seconds. The way his brother – his lover? – responded to him was nothing short of mind-melting. The way he purred his words, coated them in golden syrup, made John’s legs want to give way.

He watched in a breathless awe as Gordon stepped out of the closet, decorated only to soften his already gentle appearance and personality. Even without the headband, the tail seemed to bring out an innocence that his cheeky brother often hid from immediate view.

A wide smile spread across his face as he carefully eyed Gordon up and down. He was the best sight, and even though he might not have likes the harness and setup, it certainly did the trick of luring him in. He had to swallow a little before trailing his eyes back up to meet chocolate ones staring back at him.

“You look... amazing.. truly amazing...”

“I feel violated.” Gordon breathed out, unable to open his eyes. “But I can't control myself either! What do I do?”

In an instant, John left Gordon's front, and walking around so he was behind his brother, and flicked up the soft fur tail in the process of giving him a hug. The last thing Gordon needed was to feel like this but if this is where the situation was heading, then John was compelled to help him feel more at ease.

“What do you feel like you want to do? Or you should do?” John murmured, giving his cheek a kiss. “If you need me to assist in any way... I'm happy to help...”

“I'm not sure.” Gordon caught his breath as he felt parts of him crying out for John’s attention. “I'm at your mercy, this won't come off unless…..” He swallowed nervously, his cheeks flushing brightly and making the bruising from Scott’s hand show up vividly along his cheekbones. “Unless you...or I it doesn't matter really it just...ahhhh!” Gordon let out a whimper as he felt more tension lower down. Oh hell it's was obvious what he needed and being toyed with right now was the last thing he wanted to be subjected to.

His head was swimming, as badly as he wanted this something wasn't right about it. Then it dawned on him what John had said earlier.

_'The last thing we need is for you to be uncomfortable and in pain because of a charity do...'_

He pushed himself away from John and growled, this time with hurt and anger.

"You're in on it aren't you!? You're actually in on their little messed up plan!" He almost fell over backwards but had walked right into the corner of his bedroom, trapping himself. "You - you stay away from me!"

Moving around however had started to hurt and the growing fear he was starting to feel on the inside was indeed affecting the outside the dancing movement of his lower half made him yelp loudly in shock before crumpling in a heap with his hands gripping the over stimulated area and whimpering with how much it was starting to hurt. It wouldn't have been so bad if John hadn't admitted he knew about tonight's plan and that sense of being made helpless and exposed was creeping in faster than the demons that haunted his sleep at night after a bad rescue. Thank goodness he didn't say too much to Alan earlier as now he had no idea if this entire thing with John was real or completely set up by Scott and Virgil to out him for what he really was.

“I'm in on what?” John was surprised by Gordon’s sudden aggression, watching as he backed himself up into the corner and slumped down to attempt at curling up.

“In on knowing exactly what's going on tonight? Ok, yes I am. I'm in the know of exactly what's going on tonight because Scott saw me and told me and Virgil demanded I kept an eye on you until you were going to London. I also know that Scott and Virgil were betting on what was to happen and the consequences of losing and winning the bet.”

He paused a minute to crouch down a little and look at Gordon straight in the eye, much like he was a parent talking to a naughty child... only... he was not a parent and Gordon was not a child.

“The more I know, the better I can work out how to make sure I can keep you safe from anything that could happen. I promise Gordon... I'd never want anyone to have to do this against their will, but I'll be damned if I can't do anything to help.”

“Oh so you call this saf-uhah!” Gordon squeaked. He didn't want to fight, just have this nasty little thing removed from his person without a trip to the infirmary. “If they told you, why d-didn’t you stop them? All they ever do is tour- Aaaah!” He threw his head back into the wall suddenly as his body tried to orgasm on it’s own but could only spasm without releasing any tension, as if to say ‘your in if for the long haul’. Shakely with desperation he started to run his fingers up and down along it to try and turn the pain into something bearable however he wasn't feeling any desire for pleasure, just alot of shame and a lack of respect from the one person he had feelings for. It was like trying to fight off a killer with thousands of knives without the blood on the floor.

He really thought John cared about him...now - Gordon was highly doubtful that he did.

John simply moved to his side and wrapped an arm around his brother, reaching around to trail his fingers around under his ribs to distract him. He had no idea if it was going to work, but he was in hot water right now – he could afford to push himself in further if ultimately Gordon would wind up ok.

“All I was told was that... you were being auctioned for charity. That's all I knew. I protested against it, you should know I would... but I don’t get says in the matter because usually I'm not here...”

His other hand wrapped around Gordon's fingers, lacing them with his and aiding in the sense of touch. Gordon’s body was still relatively new in terms of everything he enjoyed, so he focused on his prior knowledge and set his hand speed to a feather-light, steady speed he knew he responded well to.

Gordon let out a deep growl as the pain started to subside a little and stretched his legs out from their huddle as he tried to relax more. “That's...that's-” his voice faltered as his head began to swim with confused emotions. “Why?” He finally managed before whimpering as a little bit of release dribbled out, still not enough to end the torture but plenty to help ease the restriction he was feeling.

It was a relief that Gordon had collapsed by his bed, as John soon reached up from tickling his ribcage so he could grab one of the pillows and carefully place it behind his brother so he was leant against the wall but still supported with cushioning, while his other hand continue to work his brother into a hopeful actual release, he shifted his weight around so he was hovering over Gordon’s athletic, perfect, tanned body. He held in an apprehensive breath, not entirely sure if this method was going to work – but he was prepared to find out.

Tentatively, he released his hand from around Gordon and enveloped him with his own mouth, listening out for any change in the response. The salty taste was addicting, meaning John went all out and started to try and milk his brother as best as he could for all his worth.

Gordon may not have got the answer he wanted but lordy hellfire was being licked and caressed making him start to cry. It was so intense that every time his body tried to orgasm with little respite he felt like his heart was about to stop and his lungs would burst. It was like thousands of tiny acupuncture needles light sitting in his skin - not unpleasant but certainly making the entire body shake and tingle with new life blood so much so that he knew he'd pass out just from physical exertion alone.

He couldn't stop squirming as his hips moved with his brother's tongue motions, his voice pleading him to end it soon.

“John! Ahhhhh uh Jonathan! Hhhahhhaah! Jonathan!” He begged in a strange mantra inbetween stolen breaths of air and loud needy groans and childish yelps.

The bucking did release him little by little however all he really wanted was to let go all at once, unable to handle this sheer ferocity of pleasure for such a long period of time.

His fingers curled into John’s red hair as he tried desperately to not pass out from the overwhelming power one tiny metal ring had on extending his sexual arousal and stimulation. Eventually he would have to give but not when he was like this - he couldn't blackout with a hard on in this harness it was already proving too dangerous for that.

“Ahhhh! J-Jonathan!”

At every mewl, every yelp, every plea, John felt himself grinning more. His head might have been stinging from where Gordon was gripping his still slightly damp hair but he couldn't care less, not when he had his brother on the palm of his hand.

“Hey is everything alright in there?” came a voice. “You ok Gordon? You having another nightmare? Need to talk about it as I can't find John anywhere.”

John paused for a moment when he heard Alan’s voice. He glanced up at Gordon to check how his ecstasy filled brother was fairing from the attention. What were the chances of Alan actually coming into Gordon’s room when there was no more mewls and cries of plea?

The door opened and there was Alan, all worried about his older brother - at least till he saw John’s back to him and Gordon looking like he was in distress, until he began to notice details like the most obvious one of John’s head between his legs with his privates in his mouth deep throating him.

“Holy shit!” Alan swore, before turning to look down the hallway to see Virgil wandering up along it. As much as he wanted to flee the scene he knew what would happen if the burly Tracy entered the room, even though only John seemed to have reacted to his sudden presence.

There would be blood.

Quickly he shut the door behind him to keep Virgil out and hissed. “Virgil’s coming!”

Gordon was struggling, he couldn't move from his position in the floor Like John could, his body still desperate for play but to exhausted to register what was happening. At first, John didn’t want to move off from Gordon, even with Alan gasping at them and the threat of Virgil coming in and seeing them both compromised the way they were. The way he moved and tried to get off from his little brother proved difficult – Gordon still had his hand tangled in his hair and was still trying to push to make him continue. His only stroke of luck was that Gordon was getting weaker and couldn’t hold him for long, so John was able to wriggle himself out and survey how quickly he could get Gordon sorted, himself and Alan half hidden before Virgil arrived. He was slightly nervous at the real possibility of being caught and severely beaten up by Virgil or Scott – or both – however if it meant that it would be able to create a diversion in which Gordon could skiddaddle from, then he was up for a bit of a scuffle.

“Hey what gives!” Alan protested as he was grabbed by the arm the second Gordon was placed onto his bed and had a sheet thrown over him. “You can’t hide me away! Virgil saw me in the doorway!”

“You aren’t hiding,” John whispered as he made sure Gordon was covered up enough and pushed Alan down into the chair, “Gordon’s still feeling sick and you wanted to come and keep an eye on him with me.”

The instruction given was simple, and he hoped Alan would simply play along and that if Virgil were to come in, it would just seem like normal. What he didn’t realise however, was that John looked in no means like he did 5 minutes ago and instead was just scruffy and completely wild... which wasn't untrue when he and Gordon had just been together trying to bring Gordon to a release.

Alan gave his older brother a dirty look. “That’s the lie you're going to go with is it?”

“Alan, Gordon woke up yesterday. He's still going to be a little groggy on his feet. He might be fine but Scott and Virgil don't need to know that yet.”

“And yet he’s been pretty ok up till this point.” Alan raised and eyebrow. “Want to try that again?”

Before John could answer Virgil had opened the door wide, grinning like a fool and his expression turning into mild surprise at the sight of both John and Alan in the room. “Looks like I’m not the only one who wants to see the outfit Penny picked.” he said without missing a beat. He walked right over to the bed, grabbed Gordon roughly by the shoulder and pulled the sheet free.

“Pffft! HAHAHAHAHA Oh goddamn!” he burst out laughing. “Just think, I almost ended up wearing that! Thank Hell Kayo talked Scott out of it.” He tugged the fluffy tail. “Hey Squid breath, We’ve gotta go! Can’t keep the ladies waiting.”

Alan was faster than John to jump in the way, taking Gordon aback a little as he slowly dragged himself upright and leaned against the wall his bed was against.

“Hey are any of us invited? I mean we can bet on people too right?”

Virgil frowned. “Why would you want to Alan. there’s no pretty birds to bid on. If anything the only blokes that’d be there would be gay and I doubt there would be many at a LADIES ONLY EVENT.” He pulled a face at the thought. “I’d love to watch though but you know that’d be just as gross.” then he shrugged. “You can always ask Kayo afterwards. She’s flying out herself soon to go. She had spare invites for a few lady friends and had them pull pout on her last minute. Unless you can find her some new friends you’re going to find out things just like the rest of us.”

John watched in disgust as Virgil manhandled Gordon as roughly as he did. It made him feel slightly sick, both with rage and with horror, at just how gleeful Virgil seemed to act, knowing full well that they were about to throw away his younger brother's dignity. When Alan jumped in, John moved to Gordon to make sure he was ok. One eye keeping an eye on Alan and Virgil, the other on a still-pained brother.

To say he was worried for both of them was an understatement. John had no idea how long it would take before Virgil got sick of Alan for wasting time and try to hurt the youngest of them and Gordon... he was in no fit state to do anything. An arm wrapped around his tanned brother’s perfect frame and tugged him closer, as if to hide him from the situation. The other hand was prepared to pull Alan to safety, if it all turned to hell.

Gordon had other ideas. He pushed himself free from John’s grip and slid off the bed wrapping the sheet around himself and picked up the headband and collar. He felt ashamed of himself for having being not only caught - but also giving into what his body wanted instead of listening to his brain that John was as bad as Scott and Virgil in all of this for knowing about it and not doing much in the way of stopping it.

Alan was also looking at him strangely, though after what he had just seen there was no way Gordon was going to ever look him in the eye again. Every ounce of respect he had for him he suspected was pretty much gone.

“Let’s get this over with.” Gordon sighed heavily, wincing as he was still hard and sore as he moved around. If he was going to lose his manhood because of this, he knew who he was going to blame thought maybe the life of a eunuch wasn’t all that bad.

John stared, dumbfounded, as Gordon got up and pushed him away. He had no idea what he was supposed to do now, since he had been the one to get up and walk towards Virgil and Alan.

“Gordon... you're hurt.” John muttered quietly, finally having found where his disappearing voice got to. He looked up at Alan and Virgil, pushing himself from the bed to stand, “He can't go anywhere if he's hurt. Any sane person would know that.”

“I’m fine.” Gordon let out a deep growl as he walked forward with a rather strange restricted gait. He gave Alan a reassuring smile and refused to look either John or Virgil in the face. “Let’s go ok, the faster the better.”

“You heard him.” Virgil chimed in relieved he wasn’t having to have to argue with John - the one person who knew how to twist words around like they were weapons when he wanted them to be. He placed his hand in the middle of Gordon’s back as he ushered him out into the hallway and closed the door behind them.

Alan was frozen on the spot for about 1.8 seconds before exploding at John with the wrath that could only be known as Cyclone Tracy - A bad habit he had learned from Gordon - and threw his arms out wide. “WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT JOHN!? Ok I er look I dunno what the hell is going on here but you just let him WALTZ OUTTA HERE! I mean come on! Even I know something is up looking at him walking like that! What the hell was that THING he was wearing anyway?”

Alan pulled at his T-shirt and tugged at the collar before continuing, “I mean that LOOKED PAINFUL! Is he meant to be so damn red down there? I mean YEOWCH - Hey why where you er- uh Oh goddamn heckle-freckle - WHAT THE FRECKLE WERE YOU DOING WITH HIS-” Alan tried to think of a better word than the lewid ones he wanted to use. “THINGY IN YOUR MOUTH!? Like, where do you get the - I mean I Uh Oh fudge pops - ARE YOU THE GUY GORDON LIKES? No wonder he didn’t tell me! You guys are- I mean... Really?”

John was so dumbfounded, so lost and confused at Gordon’s change of heart that it took him a while longer than normal to realise that Alan was giving him an earful.

“...it would be painful for him, it's not supposed to be that uh.. red.. ‘down there.’” He quietly explained, opting to use Alan's words as to not say something that make him feel even more weirded out. Hell, he felt weirded out having to explain himself to Alan. He practically raised Alan singlehandedly while Scott used to watch over the other rapidly growing brothers they had. John's teenage life had been spilt between studies and having to look after the two youngest brothers, and being confronted the way Alan was confronting him made him feel.... dirty. He was still just a kid in many aspects after all, he shouldn't have had to see that. Any of it. However, since he was never one to be exactly subtle when being put on the spot, John shifted and slowly sat himself back down on the bed.

“I was uh.. trying to help relieve him of tension. That's why I was giving him... ..the point is, Alan, is that the outfit he was wearing is supposed to delay an orgasm and prolong arousal. However, the uh, ring, is a little too tight around him, meaning that it's getting more painful and...” he sighed a little, “As a result, it's just not... nice an experience.”

“Delay org- what? I don’t understand, what the hell is it and why was he wearing it in the first place? Also if he was in pain couldn’t you just I dunno cut it off and not…..” Alan swallowed hard. “ Damn freckle! What was going on in your head just now to make you think, ‘Yeah I’ll suck my younger brother’s bits off as that’s better than cutting him free?’”

“I'll explain later about what delaying an orgasm means... just, in the meantime, you have to understand that I couldn’t cut him free without an incredibly high risk of damaging Gordon’s... reproductive organ. Since the ring was already digging into his.. “bits,” cutting the ring would have most likely ended badly...” In a way, out of all the things Scott failed to actually follow up on after discussions, he was glad that Scott didn't end up giving Alan the sex talk. He was fairly relieved at how clueless his youngest brother was, as it made his life a little easier.

“So you put his bits in your M-O-U-T-H,” Alan stressed this detail as much as he could, “And tried to fix it with your TONGUE.” he frowned. “Don’t treat me like an idiot John, I’ve watched porn on the Holo tv before and the tablet. I KNOW WHAT I SAW.”

...so much for hoping Alan was still innocent. John sighed a little and nodded, looking at his youngest brother. “Yeah, I did Alan. I put him in my mouth and was trying to get him to orgasm. The ring stops it from happening normally, which is why arousal goes on for longer. But.. like I explained, it was already too tight for Gordon to begin with probably..”

Alan rubbed his eyes and pinched his brow, imitating Scott in every way possible when trying to use his brains to find answers.

“SO is this a thing now? You’re going to lie to me that you’re involved in incest with Gordon?” Alan grumbled. “Should have guessed when he said he liked someone was desperate to not tell me who it was… I mean, he’s like me when it comes to getting off this stupid rock - how else would he meet someone!” he let out an amused snort to try and make it sound less messed up than it actually was…. Oh…” his expression was quick to change, looking a little worried.

“Gordon looked more than just sore though.... He looked really hurt inside too. Hey if - if you and him are- why didn’t you stand up for him? I mean like really fight for him....did something happen? I mean Gordon can be read like a videogame walkthrough he’s not that complicated to understand.”

For some reason, the knowledge that Alan knew – and clearly didn’t approve – made John feel even worse. The point he made about Gordon never leaving home was one thing but then again, John being home was a rarity and if he hadn't left the comforts of his own thunderbird, a place that became more that just a home away from home, Gordon wouldn't even be here anymore. Nobody seemed to realise how close they were to losing him. Nobody seemed to care. What was even worse about that situation was that everyone was surprised that John had gone down to rescue his brother himself. John knew Gordon could have died, everyone else saw the knew the data readouts once they were home and yet they still never batted an eyelid to Gordon's lucky escape.

“I'm not lying to you Alan. If you want to know the truth, fine. Yes, Gordon and I are having sex together and we like it. Last night he walked straight into my room after having woken up, he needed company, someone who could tell him that everything was going to be alright because he almost died. The last thing he remembered was blacking out, freezing cold.” John chose this moment to meet Alan's gaze, looking at him dead in the eye. “Last night I comforted him and made him feel like a billion dollars. We had sex and honestly it was amazing. We both loved it, we both loved making each other feel everything we felt. And yes, I know you were home last night but we knew that if we were careful enough, we wouldn't be found out. We were going to be each other's secret but of course just as usual, someone has to come along and always ruin it. Gordon doesn't want to do any of this, hell as you said, he isn't even into women. But still he's pushed and pushed into doing it.” At this point, he reached over and picked up the stained turtle, placing it in a washing basket he'd made while Gordon was sick. There probably had been no reason to blurt this all out to Alan, but if one person knew, it wouldn't be long before the others found out, whether through talk or by seeing.

Alan opened his mouth and shut it before replying. “I never once mentioned that Gordon was gay. I thought he told me that in confidence. I - I thought you were taking adva- being as bad as Virgil and Scott.” Alan said quietly, feeling a little guilty for being told too much information than he really wanted. “If that’s the case - then you ARE still as bad as them for not putting up much of a fight.” he looked at the floor and tried to stop thinking about the sadness those amber eyes of his usually cheerful brother had, like something was broken and unfixable.

It was impossible to do so.

“I thought it was just a date, just like Gordon did till Kayo laughed and told me in the kitchen.” he admitted. “I wanted to know if Gordon was still in the dark about it and see if I could do something to help. I’m just as bad aren't I? I didn’t stop Virgil either....”

John twisted his face after he heard what Alan had to say.

“I'd never take advantage of Gordon... or anyone. Every other time I would ask, it was only because he was so in pain that I didn't have a lot of choice...” He let out a breath and shook his hair a little. “Scott and Virgil are planning more than just this event. Scott first told me when I got out the shower this morning. I tried to talk him out of it, but he wasn't going to take it. Was too happy with shouting at Gordon to care already. Virgil told me more though... he wanted me to keep an eye on Gordon until they were due to leave. They set up a bet over how much Gordon would raise by having himself sold off to some to rich lady, and then whoever won got to have him for a week of their own once he was back home. I wanted in on the bet, so it would give me an excuse to get closer to the event and bend it so he wouldn't get sold off and he would be able to come home safe... but if Kayo already knew about this too...” John looked up at Alan and pushed himself up, walking over to hug Alan. “Don't beat yourself up for this. It isn't over until we say it is, ok? We might still be able to get Gordon in the clear before it's too late...”

“But what can we do? It’s not like we can just ask Kayo to take her spare tickets. Virgil said it was LADIES ONLY. we’re not exactly ladies John.”

“On the contrary, we could still head out with Kayo. The event is being held at Penny's country manor, meaning there'll be a perfect sky to see. All we need to do is tell her we want to go stargazing, and then show up... you're ok with dressing up, right Alan?"

“Huh?” Alan blinked. “Hey NO WAY! If you’re suggesting we’re dressed like Gordon was then you can stick it up your jumper!”

John paused for a few seconds to look at Alan with the weirdest expression he could muster.

“Where did you get that idea from? I was suggesting we dress up like girls and sneak in on the charity event and try to win Gordon through the auction.” John explained, cocking his head to the side to look at his little brother, “You don't mind dressing as a girl right?”


	6. Dresses

Gordon groaned as he sat down on the medbed inside Thunderbird Two after having refused to sit with Virgil in the cockpit dressed as he was. It also meant he could raid the tool box on board and right now he had a rusty set of bolt cutters in his hands.

He peeled back the sheet off himself and winced. No wonder he was in so much agony! He was so red he was turning blue.

Gordon carefully slipped the cutters around the ring, biting hard onto the sheet he stuffed into his mouth in case of an accident to prevent screaming and snapped the ring in two places, making the harnesses slip off around his hips and away from his body.

The bolt cutters clanged heavily on the metal floor and he curled up into a ball as the numbness in his lower half started to feel life again and it was like being warmed up suddenly inside Thunderbird Four again, only this time Gordon wasn't ever going to want to have sex with anyone to keep alive.

Or sex ever again come to that. He felt so betrayed right now his heart was bleeding all over the Pod bay, just like it was bleeding out of his wedding tackle as his body could now finally cum and good god - there was a shit ton of it in the mess he was forced to make.

He needed a doctor - but there was fat chance of that.

At least Virgil couldn't beat him up over this. He was the one who suggested Gordon have a wank to feel better and calm down after realizing why he could barely walk to the big flying machine. Besides once he saw the damage he'd be a little merciful, just not enough to get him out if the auction. After all a week of getting him out from underfoot was something his older brother would definitely want so he could spend time alone with Kayo.

He had to hope whoever bidded on him would take him straight to emergency.

  


  


“Pink, I mean REALLY? I thought you hated pink?” Alan tugged the back of the dress down as he could feel a breeze up the back of it. “Also, why do I get the one that flairs out around the arse? I swear I feel naked under this and freckles! Shaving the legs feels like they're on fire!”

John laughed a little as he twirled in front of the mirror to check out what he was wearing. His evening gown, much to Alan's obvious description, was pink. A lovely pale colour, with a high waisted, thick banded ribbon that ran around his middle, a lace torso, and a wonderful flowing pink skirt that ran to the floor. “I’m wearing pink because gold suits you. Besides, mine’s simplistic, so it wouldn't have suited you much anyway.” Turning around, he finally got to see how Alan looked in the dress and not just standing behind it. And boy did he look like a proper little princess! Alan’s dress, much unlike his own, was a magnificent golden colour, which rich and intricate designs on the skirt. The top half of the dress was mainly backless until halfway down the back, and the top half of the skirt had the design of hanging chains of jewels and drops, resembling a pattern fit for royalty, whereas the bottom half of the skirt faded into a large leopard-like design. Plain versus extravagant. Just as different as John and Alan were at times. “I told you, you should have waxed.” John continued, “It's a lot quicker, slightly more painful but gives a better result in the long run. Do you want me to do your hair, or think you can fix that yourself?”

“I want to pick another dress.” Alan sulked. “It just doesn’t suit me.”

“Ok, if you want to find something else. I bet anything Penny picked these out though for Kayo. Most of these gowns are more her style than Kayo’s...”

“Hey Kayo,” Alan poked his head into the private bathroom she had in her guest room “Do you mind If I raid your wardrobe for another outfit?”

Kayo was sitting in front of the bathroom mirror trying to fiddle around with her strapless bra, quietly grumbling about how impractical it was. Why would anyone want to wear a non-supportive bra that had big dreams of being a belt?

Her hair was pinned up into a messy, temporary bun, and upon hearing Alan, she turned around to look up him.

“Sure Alan.” She nodded before looking at him. “How come you look better in that dress than I ever did?”   


Alan went red and then quickly pouted. “I swear you made me wear this because Virgil didn't like it. Anyway if he's seen these dresses, won't he know it's us? I mean he's supposed to be flying Gordon over so won't he recognise these if he decides to hang around as your date?”

“Virgil loathes that dress,” Kayo sniffed, “Says it's too girly for me. But it has leopard spots and has easy movement, so I could still defend myself if needed.”

Finally having sorted out her bra problem, she turned to face Alan and picked up a hairbrush, waltzing towards the youngest Tracy. Taking his hand, Kayo led Alan back into her room where John was sitting waiting for them to pick out new outfits for the three of them.

“Don't worry, the others won't know it's you. But if you want to pull this off properly boys, you will need to make yourselves up properly, add well as secure yourself fake identities so it all looks more believable. If you just lay low, you won't cause a scene."

“I guess making up fake identities is your area, huh John?” Alan smiled a little. “Seriously though Gordon would have loved this - it's like that Halloween party of Scottys he snuck us unto, you remember that one dad relented to only if you and Virgil kept him out of trouble?” Alan chuckled a little as he looked inside the wardrobe at all of Kayo’s unworn dresses she owned before letting out a deep sigh. “I hope he's ok. Being dragged around like an unwilling dog on a leash doesn't suit him and that's all they ever do to him since Brains’s bucks night. Sometimes when he sneaks off to spend time alone underwater in Thunderbird Four just to get off the Island for a while I worry he'll never come back.”

He reached in and pulled out a vibrant red dress that looked shorter and more flared and had black trimmings - something their Grandmother probably wore when the American fifties fashions were back in style - that made him grin again. “Ohhh looks like I can go in style afterall! I may not be able to take Thunderbird Three but damn I can certainly wear her sleek colours!” he thought for a second before turning to Kayo. “Does this come with those head kerchief things? I think I have an idea how to make my hair look good short still with it!”

“I'm sure I can whip something up by the time we reach the venue.” John nodded, getting up to look in the wardrobe with Kayo and Alan. “All we'd need are a couple of fake names and bring some money out so it looks like we're paying up front...”

“What do you mean about a dog on a leash?” He suddenly looked at Alan, “You mean, this has happened before? When? Was I... on Five at the time?”    
Kayo laughed and spun Alan around, pulling him to the mirror and holding the dress in front to help visualize the outfit on him.

“Hmm... I might have a nice headscarf that could work. Style it up, maybe a little bit of glitter makeup, and you could be set to go.” She smiled. “Come on, I'll help you into this dress and get your makeup sorted out.”

She grinned and dragged Alan off back towards the bathroom but instead of John finding a dress and following them, he just stared blankly at the materials.

All he wanted was to look after his brothers. Keep them safe, protect them from all the bad that was trying to scare them. He still couldn't.... couldn't save them. But he was going to save Gordon. Gordon was going to come home and be looked after, nursed back to health and then he'll be ok..and safe.


	7. Caving in

Virgil walked into the pod bay and swore loudly before reaching Gordon’s shivering body on the med bed. The sheet he brought with him to cover himself had blood smattered on it along with the bolt cutters and the harness on the floor and Virgil assumed the worst, his brother desperate to get it off had injured himself in the process.

He found Gordon a pain in the arse at the best of times but wasn't a complete jerk. If his brother had self inflicted an injury though he wasn't going to be getting any sympathy. It wouldn't be Gordon if he didn't try and do something to get out of things he wasn't willing to participate in - having once putting his own bird on a self destruct sequence just to get Virgil to cave in and let him participate in an already difficult rescue while locked up inside Thunderbird Two's pod bay.

It had worked too.

“What have you done now, Fish brains?” He chided rolling his younger brother towards him to look him over. “Shit, what happened?” He exclaimed when his inspection brought his siblings injured regions to his attention. He hesitantly touched it as even the very idea of having to do so grossed him out a little but the bruising around the pelvis was was alarming.

Gordon whimpered and hissed between his teeth. “Don't touch me.” He managed to growl, but the threat fell on deaf ears, as Virgil shined a light overhead and started to do a proper assessment of the damage.

“Did you do this to yourself just to get out of the event tonight?” Virgil frowned, unimpressed.

“Oh sure, like I'd willingly do this to myself.” Gordon snapped, finally finding his voice. “It hurts like hell, Virgil! That ‘thing’ was on too tight and I couldn't get it off the second it started to get uncomfortable as it was too late!” he pushed himself up and shoved Virgil back a little but didn't have the energy to push him away far enough so his brother had leant him back again trying to work out for himself if Gordon was telling lies.

Eventually Virgil snorted. “Ok so maybe it was. You could have said something before it got this bad.”

Gordon raised an annoyed eyebrow. “Oh? Would you have believed me? Be honest Virgil, you guys hate the idea that I could possibly get anyone I want and you guys have to go bar hopping just to get a hint of action. For the record it was ONE TIME and I've never been that lucky since. You both get more action than I ever could.” Besides, he added mentally to himself - the way John had managed to wind him up, Gordon was confused as to how much John really did care about him. After all they did hit a period for a few years where they barely spoke to each other because John just somehow disconnect himself away from everyone after university and with his position in International Rescue. Ok so he wasn't absent entirely but the brother that always chased after him when he needed him had been gone for sometime….

Until he almost froze to death four weeks ago. Even then he was unsure if John really took him seriously when his heart lay open to him and was just going along with it because Gordon had been sick and just needed the reassuring comfort. He did say he loved him with so much conviction though, which was the part that he didn't understand - John wouldn't just say those things to just anyone unless he meant it.

He hoped.

Virgil had been pondering Gordon’s words. “You know, you're right there. Why haven't you ever had any luck since then?”

“Because I - I haven't bothered to go looking I guess.” That was entirely true, he had to encase they found out he was into men. He couldn't risk the beatings and the ‘rehabilitation’ efforts they'd try to get him back into batting for what they called ‘the right team’. Heaven help him if they found out he was committing incest with John - they'll both be dead…

“Well we can fix you up and you'll hopefully get lucky tonight!” Virgil slapped his leg playfully. “Maybe this could work out for you!”

“Virgil I -” Gordon caved. I couldn't say what he wanted to so he just nodded and lied. “I suppose so.”

As Virgil busied himself into finding Gordon a spare pair of trunks in the hold, He ran his fingers through his mattered waves in an attempt to pull himself together into some form of composure.

“Sorry John.” He mouthed under his breath so Virgil couldn't hear him. “Maybe this is for the best, what we did was wrong, my fault and even though I won't ever be happy at least one of us can be accepted for what we are.”

He dragged himself off the med bed, his feet touching cold steel and when Virgil returned, pulled on the dark coloured trunks he was offered in silence. Virgil had gone through his clean uniform spares and found them so at least they were his own underpants. 

“Well you're not in full costume anymore. Guess there's no point putting the ears and tail on now.” Virgil inspected the clip on tail.

“It's still got the collar and leash. It should be fine.” Gordon gave him a shy smile. “That will have to do.”

Virgil grinned as he patted his brother's bareback. “That's the spirit! I hope you get really lucky tonight!”


	8. Emaciation

Alan looked around the room. There was so many ladies sitting at tables in fancy dresses and hats drinking tea and eating tiny little sandwiches he began to wish he wasn't having to wear a dress. He was a horny young man afterall, all these pretty woman in the one place was doing things to him under the disguise. He leaned in his seat over to Kayo, “So when does the auction part start?” 

Kayo was never one to usually attend lavish events such as this but whenever she was invited, she never complained or tried to get out of attending unless it was urgent. And in this case, she simply found the whole Alan-and-John fiasco of disguising them as ladies thrilling! 

“Lady Penelope will soon come out to the stage and will announce a five minute call until the auction starts. When five minutes is up, all the men being bid on will be lined up, ready for the auction to start.” She explained in a low voice back to Alan.

She herself wasn't planning on bidding at the event but instead was going to donate some money at the end towards the charity Penelope was raising money for. Besides, even if she had tried to win someone, she hadn't booked herself a week long holiday, so her money would have been wasted on some fella who probably had an ego the size of the Houses of Parliament. 

“Ah so joint humiliation for all the men involved huh?” Alan went red as his eyes scanned the room again.

Around the back of the stage, the fellas up for auction were getting ready.

“Here you go, Master Gordon and this time, put the outfit on. Her ladyship expects all of you to dress for display.” Parker frowned, handing Gordon a new harness. 

“Uh thanks.” He tried to sound happy about the situation. Right now he just wanted to sit down and hide as didn't want to be there. The other blokes putting themselves up on offer were all tall, thin and build like magazine models - the sort Gordon would perv on when alone inside his submarine when he got lonely. One bloke walked past him and looked like chocolate skinned god of Olympus and he had to take a deep breath to get himself under control.

These guys were not gay but damn if he had the opportunity he'd be happy to attempt to swing them his way. One bloke was standing all casual talking about the ladies had the biggest errect organ Gordon had ever seen in his life and it was impossible not to look.

They were all perfect - and here he was, short, stocky, wrong body shape covered in scars and tattoos and once he put the new costume on, bruised beyond belief.

Looking at what Parker gave him made him growl, not just in annoyance for being told he had to dress the same but because the ring for the front was even smaller than the one he had to cut off earlier. Gordon knew he wasn't as impressive as these other hunks of man meat but he knew there was no way he would get that over the tip let alone the shaft if he tried.

Why did everyone assume he was so small? Sure he wasn't lovely long and slender like John but he wasn't a slouch - he knew he was wide enough to fill anyone quite well.

Suddenly, comparing himself to John made him look around at the guys again, this time with a huge pang of guilt. John wasn't perfect bodied like these guys either but he was still very attractive, even more so. There wasn't a single bloke here who could be compared to his older sibling, there was no grace, no elegance in looks and movement and while John didn’t have the muscles the beauty was in his long slender limbs and his pure untainted pale moonlight skin.

Just thinking about him and being amongst these sex toys on legs was starting to stir pain lower down - getting aroused so soon after what he had just went through the worst possible idea his body could decide to do on it's own without his mental input.

He walked towards Parker who was by the door and asked, “Sorry Parker, Can you direct me to the nearest bathroom? Really have to go.”

Parker looked him up and down. “As you wish Master Gordon. It's the first room to your right.” 

“Thanks.”

Parker watched him walk into the bathroom and once the door closed, stood in front of it. Master Scott gave strict instructions in his bride that Gordon was not allowed to ‘vanish’ from the auction and while Parker agreed he couldn't have cared if the younger Tracy made a dash for freedom, he never truly found him worthy of any ladies of his mistress's station - even if Gordon was one of Jeff Tracy’s sons, the billionaire with a much sort after fortune. Heck he wouldn't be surprised that's the only reason anyone would place a bid on him.

Gordon hissed as he removed his trunks and saw what he had been dreading since starting to feel pain. There was alot of blood and with that hormone surge he should have been erect but no… his body was trying hard though and holy hellfire!

His back banged against the door as he slid to the floor, using his trunks to try and stop the blood that was leaking out.

“ Is everything alright in there?” Parker’s voice filtered through the door. “It starts in a few minutes.”

Gordon wanted to break down and cry. He had kept it together well to this point, his high pain threshold helping him through the worst and most humiliating portions of it… but now -

“Did Kayo turn up?” He asked, trying to mask a yelp.

“M’lady arrived with a few girlfriends. Why?”

“Can you go grab her please Parker? It's urgent.”

“If it's important you can tell me.” 

“Uh… I'd rather not if it's ok Parker. Just bring Kayo ok?” Gordon found himself wincing as fire flared up into the rest if his pelvis and the tops of his legs. “Please hurry.” 

Alan was bored, there was so many cucumber sandwiches you could stuff your face with. Eventually he sat up when John elbowed him to pay attention as the auction was about to start.

Nineteen young handsome men strutted out in their super revealing costumes and Alan shuddered at the very thought of anyone willing to shamelessly show off like that. May as well be naked, but the gasp from both John and Kayo suggested that having all of them walk out with thier bits to attention was clearly exciting for the ladies and the one gay person in the room - though with John it was hard to tell, the make up hid his flushed features pretty well.

Which was why John almost let out a sigh of relief when the auction was called to start. He gasped, almost involuntarily at the various men that stepped out in their revealing outfits. A sideways glance to Kayo, and then back at the men at the front. He had to make sure that he wasn't the only one in such awe. All of these men, while most certainly very attractive, were the stuff that John always aimed for his body to be like. Muscular, but not crazy like Virgil's. Slim, but not his slim where he looked like he had been starved. He had tall, but he felt disproportionate sometimes. 

These men looked amazing.

Kayo, on the other hand, had feigned the whole shock of seeing those men up on stage. Of course she was stunned by just how bold those men were, how big their egos must have been, but even to her it just seemed a little... well, nobody would catch her ever floundering around in a provocative outfit for others to ogle at, that was for sure. Unless there was someone special in her life, she wouldn't feel comfortable with showing herself like that.

Alan squinted to try and take in more details. None of them had that ‘bad boy’ look that Gordon sported or looked like they'd ever being anything else other than groomed and pampered for this very occasion. Where was the rough ‘trouble maker’ that ladies would go for?

“Hey, where's Gordon?” He said aloud snapping both Kayo and John out of their trance. “He's not up there!”

It was then Parker had reached their table. “Sorry to interrupt your fun ladies, but Mistress Kayo your presence has been requested. If you could follow me, it would be appreciated.”

“What’s happened?” She asked quickly and quietly, standing to follow Parker. Folding her hands behind her back so Alan and John could see, she sent the universal Tracy “wait” signal, hoping that they would stay at the table until she called them herself.

“Not entirely sure.” Parker was honest with her. “But it was Master Gordon who called for you.”

 

Kayo frowned. This was going to be bad, if listening to what John and Alan were discussing on the way here was anything to go by.

“Where will he be, Parker?” 

“Still locked in the bathroom I should think. He sounded in a bit of destress.”

 

“Bathroom. Ok. I'll head up, if you could go and retrieve a few towels... and maybe a small blanket, as well as a first aid kit just in case... this could actually be serious.” She instructed, looking at Penny's butler and companion.

“Please hurry.”

Parker looker at her quizzdly. “You think he'd purposely hurt himself to get out of this event? Oh dear, then why volunteer? I don't understand.” Parker gumbled. 

 

“He didn't volunteer, the others offered him up without his permission. Until.. I think this morning, he was still in bed, with John hoping he's wake up.” Kayo explained, leaving the ballroom with John and Alan in tow. When they located the main bathroom, Kayo knocked on the door.

“Gordon? It's Kayo. What's going on in there?”

Gordon shifted his position on the floor against the door. “Are you alone?”

Kayo looked at Alan, mouthing for him to go off and check Parker was on his way with the towels, then glancing at John before looking back at the door. “Yeah.. I'm alone. What's happening?”

“Need an ambulance…” he whimpered. “Sorry it's embarrassing to tell you exactly but I really do need an ambulance.” 

 

“I'll get an ambulance called but I will need some sort of description for the medics so they can help you properly.” Kayo said with a firm yet reassuring voice, looking up at John who was already digging his phone out of Kayo's purse and dialed up the emergency services. 

“Can I come in, Gordon?” She called out a few moments later, looking down the corridor to see if she could spot Alan or Parker coming back.  
Nothing yet but they will... hopefully.

Gordon winced. “Give me a minute to move from the door. Just you ok? No Parker or Virgil - they'd not want to see this.”

He dragged himself away from the door to rest along the wall, the pain spreading so far around his legs there was no way he could stand up let alone walk anywhere. “Ok, Kayo….just promise me you won't tell any of my brothers this, they'll just make fun of me if they knew.”

Kayo exchanged a look with John, before sighing and nodding.  
“Just me... come to think of it I don't think I've seen Virgil at all this evening. I won't tell anyone, I promise.”

Kayo glanced back again, and once again locked eyes with John, who looked even paler after hearing Gordon through the wall. Though she didn't exactly know what the deal was, she felt like she had a pretty good idea – though she wasn’t about to question it or be repelled by the notion. They'd potentially found each other, and in a world as crazy as theirs had become, she was glad for them. 

It made her wonder just how many things were on the line tonight.

“Ok... Gordon I'm coming in now, ok?” 

She didn't give him time to answer, didn't want to give him time to answer, but instead simply opened the door just enough for her to squeeze into the bathroom and close it behind her.

 

Gordon looked up as he heard the door close and gave her the weakest grin he could. He had lost all colour in his face, his hands were covered in blood as he was holding his underwear in place to try and stop the bleeding.

“I know you've seen worse before, I'm not exactly above being accident prone on rescues but this isn't a large bleeding tear in my suit this time.” He winced with a stab of pain. “This is just a little more sensitive than usual. I-I think I've ruptured a vein or something….or at least damaged the main tract as it's just dripping blood non stop. Those things those guys are wearing out there - I fucking hope the ladies bidding do it fast and take their prizes asap otherwise they're looking at their fun week in a bathroom like this.”

It took Kayo about 1.47 seconds before she let out the first of what would be many curse words. All sense of keeping her dress clean had been so swiftly forgotten as she got herself down to his side to carefully pulled his hands away from trying to cover himself.

“Right. Shit... we need to try to clean up as much of it as possible.. the blood.. jeez, Gordon how could you tell anyone about this? Did you even want to be doing this in the first place? I thought you didn’t fancy Penny anymore...”

She busied herself with getting one of the few towels arranged on the side and ran it under the tap to dampen it, before returning to Gordon on the floor. 

“I don't fancy Penny anymore heck, I haven't ever fancied her! I was just nice that's all.”

“I'm going to try cleaning up the blood on your legs first, ok? I need you to promise you'll communicate with me Gordon – I can't have you getting even worse.”

Gordon felt like his words fell on deaf ears so he grabbed Kayo’s hands to force her to look at him in the eyes.

“Are you listening to me? If you're not then I'd rather be left alone to bleed, thanks.” He growled as the pain flared up. “Probably be better all round if they failed to function, who'd ever want to let me sleep with me anyway? Right now I'm kinda feeling like it's not worth rescuing me as no one is going to give a shit about what I want!”

Kayo was stunned into silence. He actually had admitted to not liking Penny as a potential lover, but only had seen her as a friend. It filled her with a quiet, contained joy.

“I am listening to you Gordon, and I get it, you didn't fancy Penny, you never did. You wanted to be a friend to her, but the others saw it as more. But you can't go around saying you aren’t worth saving because you know damn right that that is complete bullshit. I'm trying to help you and get you cleaned up so when the medics get here they know what needs to be done in order to help you.”

She never usually snapped at Gordon, or at any of the other brothers unless she was really in a bad mood, but she wasn't currently in one. The way Gordon was acting annoyed her, giving up on himself the way he was.

“Did you want to do this Gordon? Did you really want to do this?”

He let out a pained yelp. “Does it look like it?” he hissed through his teeth as he let go of her hands to grab himself at the source of the burning fire.

“I'd have been ok if I wasn't made to stand in a room with a bunch of young sexy guys who look like beautiful ken dolls and got damn aroused by it! Which by the way is why I'm bleeding, I couldn't control myself attempting to get an erection after what else had been going on today and ok so I didn’t get one, instead I just started to bleed.” He whimpered a little before saying more, this time a little more quietly. “I just want it to stop, Kayo. I want to stop being humiliated and feeling like I don't matter. So maybe I don't mean anything to anyone - but being told that and made to do these things doesn't fill me with great desire to feel great about anything.”

 

“As far as I know, you were still out until this morning. Both Penny and Parker know that you were injured badly. Why didn't you just pull them aside and tell them that you weren't feeling ok? Get.. I don't know, John to back you up since he was sat by your bedside all this time. That would have been a lot more sensible and they would have listened.”

She bent down and began to run the damp towel around his legs, working as quickly and as gently as she could to mop up the blood that was still coming out. Kayo bit her lip as she worked, thinking of something to shift the conversation a little.

“I probably wouldn't have put any at all on anyone. Not really my... I never saw the point. It was only because Penny insisted that I came..” she pulled a little face, “Would you like a glass of water?”

“N-no thanks.” Gordon fell quiet. He openly admitted to someone other than Alan he was gay and an eyelid wasn't even battered. If only Virgil and Scott would be so.. Accepting, he wouldn't be so terrified.

“I don't think he would have.” Gordon said after a while, his voice quite sad in tone. “John I mean. They had the chance, he and Alan….and they….” He frowned. “They have to care about everyone but they don't have to step in and fight in my corner because they have to be fence sitters. That leaves no one I can trust to help me when things that shouldn't happen, happen. If I didn't stupidly shoot myself out of Thunderbird Four into the snow John probably wouldn't have lifted a finger and only worried about me in the way he does with everyone else, hangs around but distant as hell.. Nothing like when we were little.”

Gordon’s voice started to shake a little. “I don't know where I stand with him right now either. Kind of wish he never left for university years ago.. As the only one who didn't go for the extra studies I wonder if learning more would have put me on the same level as them...all of them. It's like being talked to as if I'm an idiot… Alan might do the same when he goes to study next year too. I don't know them like I used to and I have to lie all the time just to make them all happy, that's not fair Kayo, not at all.” He leant back on the wall and looked away, unable to watch as his adopted sister tended to his sorry excuse for a body yet again for injuries. It was wasn't humiliating, more like utter shame for getting hurt again for the millionth time.

“So...no betting huh?” He tried to change the subject back to Kayo instead of his estranged relationship with his siblings which now suddenly felt bigger than he ever really noticed. “If Virgil was up there, would you have?”

Kayo grinned ever so slightly as she listened to Gordon’s fairly evident broken-sounding heart over the idea that John probably wouldn’t have betted on him. While she knew that he was so very wrong, she could see where he was coming from, as boys sitting in on a “girl’s only” betting event was a big no-no. They weren’t invited, so they shouldn’t have been there.

She worked as gently as she could as the damp towel had to travel up closer to his pelvic regions, where the pain was no doubt going to be a hell of a lot more noticeable in not only his facial expressions, body language and in his speech patterns. 

“Pfft, jeez Gordon,” She snorted a little at his comment about Virgil, “I don’t think I would have been able to even enter the same room as him – his ego is so big when it comes to his defining masculinity. Which, by the way, is partly just show as I can pick him up and carry him around. You should see the look on his face when I do. He gets all flustered and embarrassed, even more so when he’s least expecting it and I take him by surprise.”

Kayo sighed a little as she grabbed another towel and placed it under him so the blood still trickling out would stain the towel and not the tiles. Of course the tiles could be cleaned of any blood, any girl on her period after a poorly timed step to the shower would know that, but having Gordon sitting in the way he was meant that his own reproductive organ was hanging down in a painful looking way, so the towel under it was also going to be able to let it rest somewhere and not just let it be a part of gravity’s usual plan to pull everything down. 

“I still wouldn’t have betted on him either way.” She shrugged, eventually continuing on with her point. “He’s a decent guy and all… he’s just not my type.”

“But, I don’t know about that Gordon – at least the John-not-betting-on-you part. Some of the things that formulate in that spacey head of his… you’d be surprised. Alan looks good in red and black… and John? Well, I never expected him to be a pale pink kinda guy… if you get what I mean?”

“Uh… No not really.” Gordon admitted. Kayo really wasn't making sense to him but it didn't matter anyway since he now so light headed she could have said she was the queen of the land of fairyfloss and daffodils and he would have just nodded along. He was now whiter than the wall he was leaning on and that was indeed a bad sign as someone who was tanned shouldn't go that pale so quickly. “They barely stood up for me before I left home….. John knew what they were doing…...he was...in on it….Kayo….why would he do that?”

He was now fighting to stay conscious and on top of the pain but now the more he thought about John taking advantage of him when he needed him to just get the stupid harness off was enough to make him willingly give up. He knew that wasn't him trying to be sexy and it was against his control his body reacted like it had…. Why couldn't he have just cut the leather harness off?

‘You're only good enough for sex, not worth kissing or the romance stuff.’ 

Right now those words from that one night stand that had haunted him for what seemed like forever we're ringing in his ears. In a desperate attempt to not let the horrible thoughts win he reached out to grab Kayo by the shoulders in a clumsy hug before breaking down into a flood of tears that seemed to no longer be able to be held back by the wall that was general stubborn Tracy genetics.

“Gordon? Come on, you gotta stay with me!” Kayo half pleaded, taking hold of his arm, “John wouldn't intentionally try to hurt you.. he's here. Both he and Alan dressed up just to get you back home safely. He wanted to—”

Her sentence was cut short by Gordon suddenly launching himself at her and wrapping around, like a sloth wrapping around a tree branch. He sounded scared, and the tears that started to trickle down his cheeks were evidence of his vulnerability. 

Pulling him closer without hurting him was difficult, but Kayo was Kayo, she could do it. She wrapped her arms around him protectively and started to try and sooth him. 

“Hey... shh... it's ok.. don't cry Gordon... we'll sort it out.. make everything better..”

She really had no idea what she was saying, but she was hoping it worked. She kept him close, continuing to sooth him until his grip started to let go as the fight was truly gone and he passed out with his head buried into his adopted sister’s long black hair.

“Gordon...? Gordon! Shit.”

Outside the bathroom, Alan was running awkwardly behind Parker dropping the odd towel as he kept almost tripping over in heels.

“Hey wait up! Seriously who the hell designed these freckle-ing things?!” Alan had to pause to wrestle off the shoes.

“Master Alan, Ladies don't swear at parties, even fake ones.”

Alan blinked. “How long have you-’

“Miss Kyrano hasn't got many friends and when she turned up with you I figured something was up. That and your breasts are falling out your top.”

Alan looked down and rearranged his fake boobs - water balloons filled with pudding.

“Also,” Parker decided to tell the younger Tracy how obvious their disguises were, “I’ve seen Master John dressed in a suit before - he looks just as feminine in a suit as he does a dress - he certainly has the legs for it for sure.”

They finally reached John who seemed to be frustrated with the lack of mobile phone reception.

“I can fetch Master Virgil if it's dire, he's still floating around eating all the canapes.” Parker pulled a face.

John looked up the moment he heard Alan and Parker approach, pushing himself off of the table he was sitting on, catching the heel of his shoe on the hem of the dress and splatting on the floor.

Damn gravity. Always ruining people's days.

“Parker, A—uh... you have the towels? Kayo's still inside, though I can't hear anything happening. I can't reach the emergency services either... it’s really bad.”

It made John feel even worse. Usually, he was the emergency services voice people would listen to, feel calmer to hear. He had let Gordon down big time, but he still had no real idea as to how he could do to help. He wasn’t trained to help, and there was only so much readout would actually teach you. 

“I have no idea what's going on... but I heard crying.”

“And you're still out here? Really John you have no people skills whatsoever these days!” Alan rolled his eyes. To be fair the last time John left the island was due to being lied to by Penelope and Parker and after being dragged into somewhere so public and crowded the timid and shy redhead holed himself up in space for months afterwards. Loads of people or situations he cannot control were his worst nightmare and sometimes threw him into sheer panic just trying to wrap his head around what was going on around him.

“I’m only out here still because Kayo instructed me to. As far as Gordon knows, she's the only one here. I.. I don’t think Gordon thought we were coming for him. Kayo told me to wait and keep trying to get the services to get here... so.. I was trying to do that. But I found scissors while walking to get a signal.” John heaved himself back up, unhooking the heel from his dress, and gestured to the scissors on the table next to him. He was only doing as told – something that was drilled into him by their father and family since he was tiny – that he couldn't think on what he could have done to help. Besides, the crying started and stopped right before Alan got back with Parker, but with the way that evidently John was behaving, he doubted that they would have believed him. 

He hated being away from space sometimes.

“Parker, please grab Virgil, we're going to need him to fly us out really fast!” Alan started to take charge in the same way he knew Gordon would if he was in the same boat - having seen him do it on numerous occasions trumping both Scott and Virgil in giving orders and getting the job done.

“John we're going in and we're going to have to carry him out together as he weighs far more than Virgil when he's immobile.”   
He then leaned on the door. “Kayo we're coming in regardless of what he says, if it's bad we'll deal with it!” He said stoutly before barging in the bathroom.

Kayo had gone back to trying to mop up the blood, having shifted herself around so Gordon was lying against her and she was working around him, on him. Her hands were bloody, but she had to hold onto him to mop up what was still leaking out. The lack of equipment meant she had not done anything major yet. She looked up alarmed when she hears Alan's voice.

“Alan no don't co—!”

The sight of Kayo holding a limp Gordon in her arms made him pause, a bad idea as it gave his brain time to register the sight in full and he reeled back in the empathetic pain of males everywhere when anything to do with the genitals were involved. 

This was to much so Alan ducked back out of the bathroom as pale looking as John’s normal skin tone, holding onto his dress roughly where his own groin was. 

“Ahhh Freckle…..that - that looked painful!”

“Alan?! What's going on, what did you see??” John worried, looking at his youngest brother. Jeez, what the he’ll was going on in there? He reached to the table and grabbed the scissors he had found, gripping them in his hand and moving over to the door.

Alan grabbed John by the shoulder. “Are you nuts? What are you holding the scissors like that for? Gordon hasn't stabbed himself and even if he did how would you get it out with those?” He took the utensils out of his brother's hand. “He's bleeding really bad in there John and not from a good place. He's not going to be having sex for a long time.” He checked to make sure Parker was no longer in earshot before adding, “Bonus for you huh, less chance of Scott and Virgil finding out you're ‘doing it within the family’.” He saw John’s expression and looked ashamed of himself. “Ok so that was poor taste, but have to admit - Gordon’s signed his death warrant if they ever find out about it. Scott can keep Virgil in check for coming out the closet - I mean he does when it comes to you - however there's no way he can stop him from killing either of you for going that far.”

“What if he has another one if those harnesses?” John protested, looking at Alan dead in the eye, “You weren’t in there at all long enough to have seen if he had one on or not.” 

John felt even more defeated the more Alan talked at him. The scissors were pulled out of his hand and almost instinctively he tried to reach out and grab them back, but it would have been no use. Sometimes he really was just the failure his father predicted him to be – the way he couldn't even formulate a plan on how to help.

Even more so when Gordon was hurt. He couldn't think and Alan was making digs at his sexuality and it just hurt. John never really knew if Scott was genuinely homophobic or not, but the throwaway comments he would make around John would always leave him unsettled. After all, he wasn't out to his family either.

Every secret seemed to just be unwinding right before the judgement enforcers of the family.

“No point in trying to apologize Alan,” he slowly eased, raising a hand, “I get it, I get it. I should feel damn jolly lucky that Scott and Virgil don’t be finding anything else out for at least another few weeks.”  
He wasn't lucky. He might have given all his love, his affections to Gordon back in Thunderbird 4 and in his bedroom, but he was probably no closer to actually having the full experience himself. 

“So what do you think we should do, then? Because I highly doubt anyone would want to be seen in such a compromising position, especially not Gordon if Virgil comes back.”

“Well for a start you two can carry Gordon outside.” Came a voice from the bathroom. “He's kinda heavy on my shoulder here.”

 

“K-Kayo! Oh.. uh yeah.. what state is he in... exactly?”

“Not good, if that's what you're trying to find out.” Kayo responded while still holding the blood soaked towel around Gordon's pelvic regions, “He's really out for the count, and losing a little too much blood for my liking.”

 

“Right ok, so I grab his arms and you his legs and we sorta drag him out down the hall and outside to Thunderbird Two.” Alan took a deep breath. He had to grow up and get over the male sympathy pains as he had a job to do.

“I... uh.. right...” John nodded slowly, looking towards the bathroom door and casting his eyes to the floor. Just 24 hours ago, neither of them could care if his bedroom door was open or closed.. but now... maybe it was better off if people could see inside of him and tell how he was really feeling.   
“Well... I'm uh... I'm ready if you are.”

As they both took their positions to lift him off the floor, Gordon started to stir and a whimper escaped his lips. 

“You know John,” Alan said, his voice low. “It may have been a shock but seriously if I can look past all this ‘stuff’ and accept you two are…. ‘closer’ than normal then I guess I'm happy for you.” He walked around to grab Gordon’s arms. “Right now you got nothing in your life than work and well...Gordon needs a friend right now more than ever so maybe it can work. Going to be hard to hide it from everyone though.”

 

John was slow to pace himself around Kayo and Gordon, kneeling down to pick up his legs, just as Alan instructed him. The towel Kayo was holding in place made him almost recoil in shock, but he was rooted, by fear or by determination he could not tell. 

He rubbed Gordon's leg a little; some description of a reassurance gesture people would do to one another, though he didn’t even know if Gordon would have felt it. Even though he whimpered, he could have still been out for the count.

“Thanks Alan... it's... hard sometimes...” 

He tried not to laugh, but he was nervous, and so his usual nervous laughter bubbled for a second or two. 

“It's scary. I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing because... relationships are new. In general... just... new.”

“Wouldn't know but soap operas Grandma watches seem to be the extreme end if it. I'm sure it's not THAT hard.”

“Most people say university is where everything happens... but hey, I'm the newbie in his late twenties, so I'm entitled to some level of what-on-earth-is-going-on-ness.” 

“Ohh so that gives me some hope next year then but hey Gordon gave me hope that you can still get lucky without the need for university parties.”

“Gordon gave you... uh huh... well, I'm sure you will. You're a lot more charismatic than I ever was and you have that famous Tracy charm after all.” John tried to crack a smile but now it really was wavering.

“Hey uh... why don’t I hold Gordon instead? I might not look it, but I can still carry you both around...”

“Sure, need a hand to lift him? He weighs a ton!” Alan exclaimed as he let go of Gordon’s arms. “Hey did you believe Scott and Virgil when they said it was a pretty lady?”

“I think I can manage for now. He might be a fully grown adult but I’m not a weakling... hopefully.” John grinned a little as he lifted Gordon up in his arms and held him close. His heart was thumping wildly; it was so loud John quietly feared that if would wake Gordon up prematurely. “I’m not exactly sure what I believe Alan...” he frowned, “I barely saw him that night, and when I did see him, I was already far too drunk to register what was going on around me. For all I know, he could have been doing the Macarena with a rabbit sitting on his head, singing in mermaid and I would have seen it all as normal...”

“Ah, and they were just as plastered so… I guess no one really asked him how that night went after he left early.”

“Nobody...” John echoed, sighing again, “Probably because Scott and Virgil were proud of him... and I was shipped back to space faster than I could open my mouth to protest.”

“So Gordon’s never spoken about it to anyone… other than me… wow that’s a first!” Alan was genuinely surprised as the walked down the corridors with John stopping a few times to right Gordon in his arms - and at one point - had to get Alan to hold his legs so they could navigate his out of the narrow doorway. “I’m usually the LAST person to be told stuff.” then it dawned on him that if Gordon hadn't lied to him about keeping it a secret then Alan just blurted it out into the open that he knew something John didn’t that might ruin everything between them. “I er… forget I said anything then.”

John kept walking, Gordon limp in his arms and Kayo tagging along to hold open door for them. He didn't dare want to stop for even a moment; fearing that if he stopped he wouldn't be able to start again. 

Gordon looked mangled. While there was far less of it, blood still occasionally tried to form a sticky seal between John's hand and his brother's thighs. 

He cast his eyes down as Alan tried to backtrack his words, but upon meeting Gordon's closed ones, he looked straight back ahead, not making contact with anyone except the wall at the end of the corridor. 

Virgil had by this time come running inside and the sight of his younger brother awkwardly being carried by his older one in a pink dress and stilettos was a sight to behold.

“Give him here.” He said, taking Gordon out of his arms without any sign of effort or struggle. “What the hell are you doing here anyway?” He pulled a face of disgust when he looked down at his younger sibling to try and not think about John crossdressing. “Never mind, I don't want to know...but shit Gordie, the lengths you'll go to so you don't have to do stuff is fucking asinine! I should have twigged you were up to no good back on Thunderbird Two! You are in so much shit when you wake up - you got serious explaining to do.” 

He looked back up at John and Alan before glancing at Kayo. “Please tell me it's an undercover mission for Penny gone wrong? Why the sodding hell are you wearing dresses?!”

“Virgil! Don't be so harsh on him!” John's anger bubbled up almost instantly, fisting his hands as his first younger brother yanked Gordon out of his grip. His anger easily matched the tone in Virgil's voice, if not actually boomed more. “How dare you think Gordon would do something like this to himself? You have no respect for anyone but yourself do you? All you care about is making a fool of others just for your amusement – not caring about the result. You were willing to sell him off, sell his body off, without his permission, consent. If he had been able to go through with this, if he wasn't injured so badly by the get-ups he was forced to wear, if he had been won by some unknown and he was made to actually perform the acts these ladies here tonight were promised the boys would be happy to perform when he didn’t want to do it, it would have been classed as rape.” 

John’s sudden rage left his blood boiling but he was far from done on his sudden mini outburst. “You” he hissed, jabbing his finger towards Virgil, “Could have been the cause for Gordon getting raped. You and Scott.” He was only at this event to try and get Gordon out. They could have easily been cuddled up at home watching movies and making sure Gordon’s recovery ended well. But no. They were here.

Virgil recoiled back a little but stood firm. He was never afraid of John and was not about to start being so now.

“Since when have you cared?” he snorted. “This might have been his only chance to meet a woman John, and he completely blew it.”

“No Virgil. This might have been YOUR only chance at screwing with Gordon's dignity. He was still unconscious until last night!! What was your plan, eh? Even if he was still out for the count, get him geared up nicely and sell him off to the highest bidder? Let him experience pure fear and terror if he woke up during that week?” John spat back.

“No, that's not innocent Virgil's style now is it? You wouldn’t have touched him if he was still lying in bed. You never once came to see how his recovery was coming along. You always found an excuse and sent someone else to come and check on him. You probably couldn't have given a rats arse if Gordon was getting better or not – you only wanted to use him in order to win a bet.”

“And your point? You're never around John. You only started giving a shit after the last incident which by the way - your an idiot for not sending me and Thunderbird Two out straight away to - you haven't cared about Gordon since before university, heck when the mechanic tore Thunderbird Four apart you didn't voice any concern, hells last time you showed any was for Alan and Kayo as they almost got fried in the sun. That was a long time ago too, years infact. Don't you lecture me about not giving a flying fuck brother dear.”

“I don't mean to get in the way of your verbal tennis match,” Kayo interjected, “But Gordon’s now paler than you, John. You can see the dark rings under his eyes are a deep purple… and that.” She pointed to the vivid bruising to his face that would have probably been hidden by his tan that was now a violent shade of blue. “If you guys stall any longer he's going to lose more than just the function in his lower half - he'll lose it entirely!”

Virgil nodded. “Kayo’s right. The more we argue the worse it gets.” He started to walk out of the mansion and towards his Thunderbird. “Come on you lot, I'll give you a lift home.”


	9. Druged and confused

Gordon stirred. He felt really numb from the waist down and a great heavy weight was across his chest. He rolled his head to the side and blinked groggily as he tried to focus on the dark coloured fabric that had tiny little star shapes scattered all over it. It was moving slightly and it took a few seconds to work out he was lying against someone - or rather - someone was holding onto him. He tried to wriggle around to see who it was.

John was fast asleep and didn't move as Gordon shifted round like a bag or wriggling worms. His older sibling when over tired could sleep like the dead, something Gordon wished he could do. Sitting up took alot of effort, his whole head swam like he had been drinking on an all night bender but he knew it wasn't the case. He moved John’s arm that lay across him and gingerly lifted up the sheet and the hem of what looked like Alan’s PJ pants - MAX must have mixed up their washing yet again.

Well, that's indeed one interesting way to become circumcised at twenty two years of age. The scars were pretty fresh and he could see the clear evidence of surgery along it and into his pelvis.

Fuck, what exactly happened? Had he ruptured the main artery or ripped an internal muscle? Was he even going to be able to go to the bathroom?

He glanced back at John, the object of classical art perfection and wondered, ‘would I even be able to?’ 

Or more importantly, ‘would I want to?’

He maybe unable to string a sentence together but he knew he still couldn't trust John after all he went through…. Heck right now he couldn't trust anyone except Kayo since Alan walked in on them and probably blabbed to Scott and Virgil.

Or maybe not. Afterall he was still alive. Maybe he could trust him….

Gordon wanted to get out of the bed and out of the room as fast as possible but the feeling of wanting to vomit started to overwrite everything so he had to lie back down again. Besides, it looked like John had wedged a chair under the door knob to prevent others coming in which meant he who was weak as melting butter on a stove couldn't get out if he wanted to.

He let out a little moan as he rolled his back to face John. As handsome as his brother was he couldn't look at him as it made him feel so afraid of what he would find there under the surface that he didn't know, didn't remember right or brought out in him by having sex together.

John was still completely, well and truly fast asleep. Once again, he had been the main brother to sit and wait for Gordon to recover. Just under a week of waiting, gives or take a day or two. John had lost concept of time.   
He had ended up falling asleep quite late at night, cuddling his little brother in a worried, frantic looking hug. He'd once again tried to deprive himself of proper nourishment until his brother woke up. 

Virgil was still furious at him for dressing up and rescuing Gordon the way he did. He knew this only too well. He had speculated that Virgil had gone to tell Scott and that in turn he was going to be severely punished for doing so.

It was not something he was looking forward to.

Gordon attempted to sit up again, this time he tried clammering over John to get off the bed and stand up but failed miserably and fell head first out of the bed and couldn't get up off the floor. His arms shook every time he tried to lift himself up due to the painkillers turning everything to jelly forcing him to remain on the carpet.

John's sleep was getting lighter as his body was trying to wake him up for a wish of food. He stirred a little and sat up when he heard a sharp thud resonate on the floor boards. His head thumped as he tried to refocus his vision from suddenly being woken up.

“Gordon...? Gordon... you're awake? Are you... are you feeling ok?” 

“Does it look it?” Gordon mumbled groggily. He swore he just dribbled every word out into a nice little puddle of drool on the floor where he lay sprawled out after giving up fighting the weakness in his limbs.

John made a move to get out of bed and help his brother up, only to tangle his foot in the sheets and come crashing down even more violently then Gordon had. Gravity hated him and the feeling at this point was mutual.   
He shifted until he was on his side and used one arm to reach over and brush some of Gordon's hair out of his face.

“You're certainly looking better than before... colour wise, at least. I uh... yeah, you have more colour back which is good.”

Gordon growled and tried pushing John away. “Don't touch me.”

“You asked me for an opinion on if you looked ok or not and with your hair in your face I couldn't tell. I wasn't trying to unnecessarily touch you.” John muttered flatly, retracting his hand from Gordon and instead using it to reach up towards the chair and blindly pat around for his phone for the time. The windows indicated that outside it was pretty early in the morning, so he could potentially still get back to his own bedroom if he felt like it, but it probably was too late for him to settle back to sleep.

“Why are you in here? Ok so I can't remember squat - but you let me go to that thing….with that thingy on….I bled everywhere...I think, must have cause something's different down there…..” Gordon’s voice wavered. “You, Alan…Virge ‘n scotty...I hate you allandI d-don’t want youtotouch me ever again.” His brain jumbled his words trying to articulate them. “Don't tr-trust anyone….”

He rolled over so he couldn't look at John nor let his brother see the tears that were starting to swell without his control. Gordon hated being made vulnerable and like a floppy ragdoll under heavy painkilling drugs. They were necessary however - standard ones no longer worked and Brains was forced to use heavier sedatives to make sure he got bed rest and recover properly.

“Trust Kayo,” John sniffed indignantly, “She was the one who pretty much saved you at that event.” 

He was lost on what to do. Here he had been, still looking after his brother when he was supposed to have been shipped back up into the stars, kept out of the way so his older and first younger brothers could have full rein and control over what would happen to Gordon. He had inadvertently dug his grave by defying them, so nothing could get much worse.

Or at least he had thought.

“I'm in here playing nurse because nobody else will.” John stated flatly, “Because after four weeks and four nights, I'm still the only one who can actually face up to do it. You would have had a choice otherwise but since it’s only me, I'm sorry to disappoint. I'm not exactly knight in shining armour material, more the stableboy.” 

Gordon tried sitting up again but got a face full of carpet. He figured as much that that was the only reason John was here. Right now though he would rather have MAX babysitting him than his older brother and that spoke volumes about how much he no longer belonged on Tracy Island. 

“Yeahwell….I don't needanyone to bemy nurse. If I bled to deathitwould have been a favour.” His words jumbled together again as he tried forcing himself up on all fours again. He was determined to fight the drugs in his system and without anyone's help. He usually had to do everything himself being the second youngest - not quite ‘middle child syndrome’ but near enough - he had to go out of his way to stand out and be noticed but in a house with five boys and the lowest intelligence out of all of them he got ignored and was expected to fail. Sure being expected to be perfect and smart wasn't a walk in the park either but at least his brothers all had interests that their father appreciated and approved of.

Eventually he got upright and the room swirled around like his brain was in a washing machine. “Dad wouldhave made...made me look after myself.” He figured he take the risk of trying to stand, using the bed to haul himself up.

Once he got his legs to do what he wanted he stood tall, wobbled a bit but regained composure he attempted to cross the room to remove the chair from the bedroom door, instead fully collapsing in a heap and swearing aloud. It dawned on him he couldn't go anywhere or do anything without John’s help and he would be damned if he had to ask for it.

“Come on!” He snarled at himself as tears dripped onto his fists like acid. “Get it together! I've -I've got to!”

John just stood back until the back of his knees hit the chair and he looked behind him. That stinking chair was so uncomfortable to sit in, yet he had sat in it the majority of Gordon's various recovery stages. 

Sure, of course Gordon didn't want him to be looking after him. John knew Gordon couldn't have heard him beating himself up for everything that had happened, but probably just looking at him gave everything away.   
Only this wasn’t about him. Never about him. 

It was about Gordon.

“Gordon, do yourself a favour and sit down before you fall over.” John said in a softer tone, sarcasm giving way to concern. “You need to get yourself better. Penelope was worried about what had happened. So was Alan and Kayo... they all do actually care about you. Your health is what has to come first.”

“What does it look like is happening John!?” Gordon snarled, his voice shaking. “I can't take two steps before I fucking hit the floor! You guys dope me up so much I can't fucking find my arse with both hands! Care about me my fucking arse! If you guys gave a shit I'd never have gone through any of that!” He really started to cry uncontrollably from his place of the floor. “You can all get fucked for all I care!”

“You have to get “doped up” on lots of different drugs just to ensure you rest.” John explained in his signature little-emotion tone that he used on scared rescue victims. “You're so active all the time that if you were still recovering, the chances of you not being able to wait would cause you further injury. Nobody wants you to come to anymore harm than you already get yourself into.”

John wasn't acting the nurse, the lecturer, the lover anymore. He was acting the brother. The big brother she should have always been and not tried to mess with Gordon in the first place. This still was all his fault after all.  
He shifted over and kneeled, tentatively reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder. 

“You know that the meds are only ever administered to get you better. Never anything more.”

“Are you sure? Doesn't feel like it…..it's like it's to get me out of the way until they need me for something. Everyone hates me John...and I hate them for doing this to me.”

Gordon couldn't fight the tears that were spilling forth now and the drugs were causing him to drool. He was a mess and had no control over anything, his body, his life or his personality - everything everyone else seemed to be.

“There’s more than one way to be kept a prisoner, John…..” Gordon mumbled before giving up and just lying limp on the carpet. “No matter how much I hate you right now…. I still love you…. Nobody can chain that up but you - dunno how you did it….I'm not just their prisoner, but your slave.”

John looked around by the chair and reached over to grab the box of tissues for Gordon as he started to cry. He withdrew one and scrunched it up in his fist before lifting his brother's head just enough to try and dap a few stray tears away before they irritated his eyes.

“I can assure you that that is the reason why Brains puts you on strong medication when you’re hurt.” He smiled softly, using the advantage of height and strength to roll Gordon onto his back and brought him so he was leaning against him. 

“But... I don't understand Gordon... how are you my slave?” his voice by this point was completely calm and quiet as to not frighten the younger brother. “I don't want you to be feeling as though I'm trying to trap you... that's the complete opposite of what I want for you...”

“Because I love you an….an will jump through fire for you…. Then you...then you took advantage...of when I couldn't….control….I didn't….” Gordon mumbled incoherently, the drugs sapping his ability to articulate. “Doesn't matterbecause….because I'll keep runnin…..running back to….”

John swallowed an unexpected lump that had began to form as Gordon jumbled out words. In his mind, he had never ever meant to take control of his younger brother's vulnerability. He had wanted to get a rise from his brothers as a way of working out how to help keep Gordon safe.

Yet there Gordon was, bringing him back to reality with a soft, lingering kiss. 

“Gordon...” John muttered in the quietest of voices, looking deep into those deep chocolate eyes, “Don't... don’t ever feel like you have to change to what others want you to be.. I love you for who you are.. so so much..”

“If I knewwhatthey wanted me to be….it'd be easy.” Gordon nestled into his sibling’s chest. “I don'teven...know whoIam….justa….toy….”

“You won't be their toy much longer... I promise you..” John whispered, lacing his hand with Gordon's and holding him close, “I won't let it happen..”

Gordon was vaguely aware he was in danger of falling asleep because of the painkillers but knew was too weak to fight them for much longer. He tugged on John’s shirt again and pulled his brother into another kiss, this one a little longer and intrepid than the last one. “Itrust….you…” he mumbled softly before kissing John again, to more or less assure his mess of a brain that this was not a hallucination.

John kissed Gordon again as soon as he was pulled down. He was as gentle as his brother was, not wanting to bring any more harm to him. 

As soon as he felt Gordon settle back into rest, he shifted and collected the rest of his sibling into his arms and stood back up, moving over to the bed and getting him safely back inside where he could sleep properly... and where John had the best position to sit by the bed.

Hands reached out as he was laid down, pulling on his siblings shirt. “D-don’t go…..” Gordon uttered completely helpless to stop John from leaving him to sit beside the bed. “Please…...stay”

John smiled a little as he was grabbed by the shirt again. He finished sorting out the blanket around Gordon and lying down next to him.  
“I'll stay... I'll stay...” 

“Good.” Gordon cuddled in close for the little safety that was on offer before drifting off into a fitful sleep where he'd uncontrollably voice his nightmares out loud.

John wasn't tired anymore as he sat and watched over his little brother. Whenever he started to whimper and let out cries, John would wrap his arms around Gordon and cuddle him carefully, kissing his forehead and whispering that he wasn’t alone, he was here to help. 

He was now. He was here for Gordon and he wasn't going anywhere.


	10. Orbital high club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> title is a play on the saying 'Mile high club'

“Hey...where's John?”

Three sets of eyes looked up from their morning breakfast and looked surprised, like they'd seen a ghost.

“Doesn't matter.” Gordon turned on his heel to go back upstairs when Alan spoke.

“He's gone back on duty, Gordo. He sort of had to. I told him I'd keep an eye on you for him.”

“Well all did.” Brain's said agreeing with Alan. “Apparently you were having a bad reaction to the anesthetic he told us so we were told to let him know if you woke up.”

Kayo just nodded. She was busy with a mouthful of toast.

“Oh. Well I guess it really doesn't matter then.” Gordon sighed. He really needed to talk to John as all he could remember the night before was John in his room and little else because of being doped up on various pain killers. He spoke but all Gordon heard was white noise and he was worried now something important was said and he was too messed up to understand.

“Wait!” Brains stood up as Gordon tried to leave the kitchen again. The three of them were still a little in shock that he was walking around after the surgery he had to go through and even more in surprise he was game enough to walk around dressed only in a pair of cotton trunks with Aquaman on them after the night at the mansion. “I-I have to send a care package up to Thunderbird F-Five in a in hour with extra fuel cells for the solar generators that need re -re installing - maybe you could go instead of m-me? John will need a second pair of hands to replace the broken ones that were hit during the last meteor storm.”

“Are you sure Gordon should go? I mean I know my way around Five pretty well these days.” Alan chimed in. “If I go up in Three it keeps the space elevator here incase you have to send up anything else.”

It was at this point Kayo spoke.

“I'm sure if Gordon feels up to walking around, then maybe an easy trip up to Thunderbird 5 could help him.” She responded, looking at Alan and then back at Gordon in his underwear before continuing. “Besides, Gordon gets the least amount of time in space – it might be a nice way to ease back into duty.”

Kayo finished her toast and winked a little at Gordon before pushing herself up from the breakfast counter.

“You would be ok with that, wouldn't you Gordon?”

“Uh..yeah sounds good actually.” Gordon was a little gobsmacked at her answer. He figured after what she saw him go through she would be the first to demand he should stay in bed - Alan a close second.

“You'd be still up there to work, I'm sure John has a spare space suit you can wear.” Alan waved his spoon around like it was a pencil, grinning like an idiot. 

“A-Actully, he could borrow one of yours Alan. You g-got new ones recently as the others were too small. G-Gordon could easily wear one of your old ones f-for the journey.”

“Oh and give him that cheeseburger that was reserved for him.” Kayo reminded with a slight twinkle in her eye. “He never ate it and now he’s back on duty, Scott and Virgil have been trying to race who gets it first.” With that said, Kayo left the three boys alone at the counter, walking off in the direction of the bedrooms, with the slightest hint of a hum under her breath.

 

It wasn’t long before Gordon was being given instructions from Brains about not opening the airlock until he got to Thunderbird Five and to remain seated for the entire journey but once inside the space elevator and out of Brains supervision, he was unseated and looking out the glass windows watching the lift launch up and out of the hanger bay. Occasionally he glanced at Brains’s large care package with the new solar nodes, a large food package from grandma that would probably be shunted out the airlock upon arrival and a special package Gordon had tucked away inside. He had bought it for John’s birthday a few years ago but because he never really saw his brother he was never able to give it to him…. Now seemed like a good as time as any. Maybe it will keep him warm in space? Or maybe not… he has to wear a thermal spacesuit up there at all times…. Though Gordon wondered if that was true. 

He tugged at the crutch of the spare suit of Alan’s and gazed out the window and marveled at the view of the sky vanishing beneath him and the edge of the earth’s atmosphere just peeking over the horizon. He had only ever been into space once with Alan and even then in Thunderbird three at the age of nineteen the view was the least interesting thing he could think of at the time as he was hanging on for dear life as the ion thrusters shot them into space and back. Now he was older and had a leisurely chance to go into space, which allowed time to fully absorb the beauty of the world vanishing below.

No wonder John loved space so much… no words could ever describe the magnificence of what he was watching.

He looked up as a female voice spoke to him and all he saw was the movement of the little camera inside the lift. 

That must be the AI. Gordon didn’t trust it - not after it tried to kill John a few years back. The voice repeated itself.

“Good morning Gordon.” Eos repeated, camera tilting down to look at the blonde haired boy in Alan's suit. She had seen him various times before from when John was watching the cctv cameras around the island, was this had been the first time they were formally meeting. “John's due to finish his sleep cycle in 19 minutes and 53 seconds. Once the elevator has docked with Thunderbird 5, will you want to go and see him, or wait in the living module for him when he wakes?” 

“Sleep cycle?” Gordon uttered in surprise. Admittedly it never occurred to him that you needed artificial help to regulate your sleep in space since there was no real night and day cycles like back on earth.

“Yes Gordon.” Eos’ camera refocused slightly to get a better look at John's second youngest brother, picking up on the finer details cctv could never offer. 

“Your change in vocal pitch suggests surprise. Did this fact surprise you?” 

“A little.” He let out a weak uneasy laugh. “Even superman sleeps right? John has to at some point.” He couldn't hide his unease, unlike his other brother's, Gordon ran with every emotion on his sleeves and could jump between them so rapidly in a conversation it made others think he was annoying, unable to focus and never taken seriously.

“Uh, so….how are you?”

“My systems are running correctly, and my RAM storage has not been used up so I don’t have to allocate any extra storage on my hard drive for virtual memory.” Eos simply responded in her light childlike voice. 

In non-technical terms, she meant that she was doing perfectly fine. “Have you recovered sufficiently after Thunderbird 4 froze in the snow?”

“I guess so. Yet to go on a mission yet so we're still wait and see.” Gordon hesitated. “Would it be silly to ask if….if John seemed worried about me that day?” John still never gave him a clear answer and he was getting desperate to know. It could mean the difference between giving John affection while up there or just doing his job Brains gave him to do and going home to cry into his stuffed toys and try and forget how he feels for John altogether. Gordon was still unsure what to think - did he or did he not really have feelings back for him? Maybe John will be upset he came up to the station and send him home anyway?

He looked out the glass window again, only now he could see his reflection against it, light over a background of stars….a little like the glass in an aquarium. He really should have shaved and showered as he looks scruffy and a mess...pretty much looking exactly how he felt.

“His pulse was abnormally erratic and he was showing signs of increasing nervous sweating when you were in one place for a long time, if that’s what you mean. He had me take over controls of Thunderbird 5 and the emergency communications when he went in search of the thermal blankets that are kept in the storage hold of the station and went down to make sure you were ok. The last time I heard from him that day was that he was cutting a hole into Thunderbird 4's hull to get you back inside and to make sure that Thunderbird 2 was on route.” 

Gordon looked back up at the camera as if it was studying him like a rat in a cage. In one way after such an emotionless sounding answer he felt as if he was being tested. It was an answer at least but it didn't answer his question in a way he hoped it would. Heart rate always goes up on any rescue and since John usually didn't do them himself it could be all related to just that - an emergency situation he had to deal with. Gordon let out a heavy sigh and looked back out the window, dejected and still confused.

The elevator docked not a few moments later, and Eos dutifully opened up the airlock doors for Gordon to pass through.

“Would you like to visit John now, or wait until he's woken up?” She repeated for a third time – a while loop that she would have to continue until the conditions of Gordon actually giving her an answer had been met.

“Uh.. Maybe later.” He looked at the stuff he had to load into the space station. “I have a few things to do first.” Like rethink my life choices, he thought to himself. Right now seeing John was not the smartest idea he ever had.

Maybe later. Of course the answer would be as obscure as that. Eos turned the camera to look down at Gordon again and make it give a little nod.  
“Very well. When you wish to see John, please alert me so I can show you where he is. He doesn’t like being intruded on when asleep. He doesn't get enough of it sometimes.”

“Oh…” Gordon watched the camera from inside the docking bay swing around and leave him alone, going through the hatch doors of the narrow corridor. Looking down at his feet while he unloaded the space lift he could see the world rotate under his feet though the glass and suddenly felt more terrified than he ever had before about being so far away from the planet. Sure he got nervous if he ever had to be inside Thunderbird Two or a hover pod and it was plummeting towards the earth but never as bad as this. The last package was something he clung to -John’s long held into present which probably wouldn't fit anymore if he tried it on to humor him - as his legs turned to jelly and he groped for the side of the narrow corridor before ending up against the glass on all fours shaking in terror. This wasn't normal for him but neither was venturing into space and seeing how tiny the earth looked since it was so far away.

When Eos said he didn't sleep enough, she really meant it. His sleep was so light in case anything happened around, that the moment he heard the elevator dock, John was straight away awake and sitting up, pressing the alarm on the side of the bed to record how long he slept for.   
He’d slept for long enough, he supposed.

Giving himself a moment, he gazed downwards, watching the marble of blue and white roll below him. Waking up on his own thunderbird was probably the best way to wake up. No matter how uncomfortable the bench he had for a bed, any aches would seemingly melt away the moment he looked at Earth.

His family's home.

But John knew that he had visitors, or at least supplies, so instead of pondering, he got up and stretched before heading to the automatic door and heading into the long corridor that lead to the various modules inside the gravity ring. 

Gordon had to get a grip on his vertigo. There was a reason he was the one who controlled a submarine afterall...vertigo was his mortal enemy. Wait...wasn't the glass closer before? 

Gordon reached for it and spun around helplessly in the zero gravity and panicking, grabbed the package he brought especially with him and held it close to his body and shut his eyes tight. Great! Just what he needed to add to the vertigo, his stomach contents reaching up and deciding it wanted to evacuate!

“Hello?” John called out as he began the gravity ring, allowing it to spin and create some form of easy walkway.   
Nothing.

He frowned a little, not entirely sure what to expect. He had most certainly heard the elevator dock with this station. Added with the fact that it was the time of year for ship maintenance... so where was whoever had joined him in his home from home? 

Not even Eos had come to greet him. She must have registered that he was awake from the alarm being switched off before it should have... so what the hell was going on?

Gordon shouted, “This isn't funny!” As he spun and floated out of control, glaring at the camera that was fixed on him. The AI had been making jokes about him and what had appeared to be childish laughter was coming from her almost human voice. He wasn't the slightest bit impressed he was her plaything. “Put me down! Come on this isn't fair!”

 

“Oh please Gordon, I'm bored because John's not been here for a long time” Eos whines, putting Gordon back down. “You always look so fun in the videos John shows me... why are you so boring now?”

Her whines were cut short by a very sharp, very unamused cough coming from her programmer.

“Eos, Gordon, would you care to explain why nobody's keeping on call duty?” 

“Call what?” Gordon looked confused, before pointing a finger at the onboard camera as he floated around, desperate to put his feet back on the ground. “Ever think there's a reason I'm not a pilot or an astronaut!? It’s because I prefer my feet on the ground!”

“Call duty.” John repeated flatly, “My job?” 

He crossed his arms and looked up at Eos, making sure to give his AI the “annoyed mother” look Alan often joked he gave. It worked either way, as Eos relinquished his brother and gently placed him back on the glass flooring.

“Thank you, Eos.”

“Captain O'Bannon called while you were asleep. She said she won't be able to make your weekly exercise session.”

“...thank you, Eos.”

“I just thought you should know.”

O’Bannon. Gordon couldn't hide the slight tinge of jealousy he felt when he heard her name. He knew John said he wasn't into her but that still didn't help his envious streak as he wanted to be the one his brother spent time with, not her. He felt John’s piercing glare on him and shuffled nervously….coming up was a REALLY bad idea now.

“Brains sent me to help fix the solar nodes on the panels...he said it would save him the effort.” he didn't lie, but it didn't sound like he wasn't making up some excuse to be there either.

“I see. Well, he never really liked being up in space...” John's face softened a little and he rubbed his face a few times to get himself fully awake.   
“Scott finally managed to chase me back up here. Eos has been so bored these few weeks - can't say I blame her. Ridley hasn't been round because I haven't been up, so she’s been bored out of her mind.” 

He rubbed his neck and smiled sheepishly, if not shyly at his younger brother.

“Ah, anyway, enough about me. Are you feeling ok? You seem a lot better, and off the heavy pain killers which is a very good sign.”

“Well… on less stronger ones.” Gordon admitted. “Still doesn't mean I can't throw up.” He shot a quick glare at the camera hovering over them. Somehow he didn't feel safe knowing she was watching them. “Oh! I also brought you up something, ok so it might not fit, but I've never really seen you around for birthdays or Christmas to give it to you…” he thrusted the soft floppy package into his older brother's chest and looked at the space boots on his feet so John and EOS couldn't see him go red in the face.

John blinked in surprise as the present Gordon was holding onto was suddenly pushed into his chest, but a smile soon formed as he looked at his brother.

“Heh... thanks Gordon. Why don't we go and sit in the living sector instead of standing around like lemons? Eos doesn't mind doing a few more hours on call duty. Maybe once you're settled you two will get along better?”

“S-Sure, lead the way.”

John smiled and placed a hand on Gordon's back gently, just to get closer to his brother. 

“Eos, keep an eye on the calls for a while please. Only notify me if it’s important.” He instructed to his AI, looking up to her camera with a sense of pride that he was in a way able to show off how individual she was to a member of his family.

“Of course John.” Came her childlike response, finished with a little nod of the camera before she spun around and moved off along the rail to head to the coms unit.

John watched her off before he looked back at Gordon and led the way towards a small sector inside the gravity ring that held his bedroom, a bench, and a holographic projector he used as a tv. 

“How are you finding it up here?”

“Besides the vertigo?” He gave John a terrified glance before looking around the small quarters. Sure it was tiny but John at least had a bed of sorts...if it wasn't for the planet rotating under his feet he would have felt right at home, as he was used to spending weeks cooped up inside a small tin can of his own - minus the luxuries of a kitchenette, shower, bed and toilet. “Ok I guess… You live like I do a little inside Four without my mess...and with proper conveniences.”

John took hold of Gordon's hand and drew him close the moment the automatic door behind them glided shut.   
“I know it’s quite different to being on Earth... but you will get used to it. I promise. Besides, you said it yourself, there are similarities between both of our Thunderbirds... and you have me for hopefully adequate company.”  
He led Gordon over to the bench and sat, looking up at his brother with a smile.

“I've got you steady, remember?”

“That's not what worries me…..” Gordon wasn't about to mention he trusted EOS in the same way he trusted Virgil right now… As far as he could throw him and that was not very far.

“Then... what's the matter, Gordon?” 

Big turquoise eyes looked up into the soft chocolate of Gordon's own and he carefully tugged at his arms until he sat with him.

“Oh… Just the workload that's awaiting me when emergencies start. It can't stay quiet forever, right?” Gordon gave his sibling a reassuring smile as he cuddled into his lap. “So...uh what do you need me to do when you're installing the new nodes? I can help as long as you give me magnetic boots so I don't float….then uh… I guess I'd have to go back….” His voice trailed off for a few seconds before changing the subject. “So, going to open the present?”

“The boots you're wearing should be already magnetic... if Alan gave you right ones that is. If not, I should have some spares.” John smiled, wrapping his arms around his brother to keep him close.

“Yes, I should open up that present... man I can't remember the last time I've actually had one to unwrap!”

His comment was of course, a little jokey, as he never really expected his brothers to buy for him if he wasn't going to be there in person. He held the present in his hands and peered over Gordon's shoulder, working his way to peel off the tape.

The moment the paper fell away and the gift was revealed, John grinned and laughed a little. 

“A panda onesie. Gee, that is nice, and it looks so soft too. Thank you Gordon”

“You may need to try it on, I'm worried it won't fit.”

“I can't have changed that much since you bought it...” John grinned before shifting Gordon off of him so he could get up.

“Give me two minutes, I’ll be back with this on.”

“Wait!” Gordon grabbed his older sibling's wrist. “Y-You can change in front of me you know. It's not like I've never seen you in your underwear. We change in the same lockers after rescues… and well..” Gordon reached up on his tiptoes to kiss John on the lips. “I..I wouldn't mind watching.”

“I know we do, but this suit is so tight I'll be wriggling like a worm half the time...” John teased, voice dropping lower, kissing Gordon back and grinning a little, “Unless you plan on helping me out of this suit...?”

Gordon’s devious smile returned, something that had been absent from his features for over a month now. “No different to you helping me out of my wet suit back on Four.” He purred, clicking the little press stud where John’s suit opened up from the from right hand side and folding back the thick thermal fabric. “Bet it's cold up here too…” he teased before sliding his gloved fingers under the singlet sleeve opening the was under the suit to reveal John’s nipple to the cold, long enough that blowing warm breath onto it made his older brother shudder and get covered in goosebumps. “Though if you'd rather strip tease and I just watch I promise to behave myself...at least, till the presents on. Then I hold no responsibility for hugging, kissing and groping you.”

“It's a little cold... but.. mnn... you'll warm me up won't you?” John breathed out, leaning forward to capture his brother in another kiss. One hand joined Gordon's in peeling his space suit back, while the other hand held onto the panda onesie.

“Help me out of this suit Gordon...” John whispered, in the most sultry tone he could muster. “It's too tight... please Gordon..”

“It's not tight enough.” Gordon growled. “Thicker than my suit anyway.” He started to peel the space suit from his brother's shoulders and slowly off his arms, revealing the slender lithe body beneath the bulk of fakery the suit produced. Gordon didn't need to be lied to about his sibling's moonlight body - John could be skin and bones for all he cared - the slender, sleek delicate frame of his older brother was more beautiful than anything in the world because it belonged to John and only John possessed such magnificence. In the low light of the stars and the occasional light refracted off the Earth as the ring rotated into view, John’s pale skin looked like the purest milkiest creamy white and it seemed to just glow against his fiery reddish gold hair. Gordon’s hands carefully removed the thin singlet that loosely covered John from under his suit and fully exposed his chest and torso to the coldness of space, stroking him like he was something fragile and precious….which right now he really was.

“Mmnnn... your uniform was tight indeed....” John eventually agreed, grinning softly as he helped Gordon get his arms and torso free. His skin was littered in small goosebumps from where the chill of space was getting to him, however it mattered not to him. 

Gordon honestly thought he had to have died to have such an ethereal experience - hell maybe he had done under the influence of all the drugs he had been under to keep him sedated - And he was either staring into the light inches from death or he was the one who was a figment in John’s own dreams. If this was really his light, then Gordon didn’t want to ever wake up.

He rested his head on John’s bare chest and ran his fingers slowly across, watching them fascinated as John’s skin glowed under them. “This isn't real. It can't be. It's like standing before a god and being told ‘it's time’ just before you die….no wonder people find religion….but it's more than that….” As he watched his own hand he realised his fingers were blocking the light out, like he was the darkness that absorbed and destroyed it.

“G-Gordon... you tease..!” He whimpered out, biting his lip as his brother trailed his fingertips around, ghosting them over the sensitive skin across his torso. 

“Ahh... oooh... heh... that actually does kinda tickle...!”

John found himself gently pulling Gordon down so they were both once again sitting on the bench. His suit was rolled to his hips, flopping down uselessly to the side for the time being.

Gordon pushed himself off John and walked towards the hatch door of the cabin, running his fingers nervously through his hair. Something so valuable was in the tiny space with him and he was unable to find anything about himself to be worthy of such beauty.

Turquoise eyes immediately shone upwards to look at him. 

“Gordon... I.. please.. am I doing something... that you don’t want me to do...?” 

John swallowed nervously, familiar senses of unease starting to set back in slowly in case he was the cause of his brother's distress.   
“You... you can tell me if something's... wrong... right?”

“I'm S-Sorry John…. I'm not sure I can… I don't deserve you or any of this…. You're just...perfect. I'll only break you and I can't do that.” Gordon looked sad, scared even. “Your so beautiful, unique, magical...the light shining out giving life to the universe…. And I'm nothing but a hulking monster lurking in the darkness that's attracted to the light but can’t appreciate it's beauty and smothers it.” he gave a nervous laugh. “Beauty and the Beast - and I'm the beast.”

“W...what? You... a beast..?” 

John had to take a couple of seconds to try and work out where Gordon was coming from, and when he couldn't, he put the onesie to one side and slowly stood up again, effortlessly gliding towards his sibling and wrapping him up in a hug.

“You can't be the beast Gordon... you're absolutely gorgeous. Not only that, but also compassionate, witty—” He paused a moment to lean forward to give Gordon another kiss. Not frenzied, but hopefully it got the right message across to his sibling.“—and above all that, part of what I need to feel human still. Nobody can make me feel so welcome like you can... and I love every bit of you.”

Gordon’s eyes met John’s and seemed to have something dark and heavy lurking in them. If he made John feel like all those things… Then why did he still feel like a feral creature that wasn't possible to love? Too many bad experiences and the constant feeling of being a failure in comparison to his brothers…. The only reason he smiled and joked was to keep up the mask so the world outside didn’t see what mess was under it.

Lies all lies.

But Gordon could never lie to John. The mask always came off, crumbling to the floor whenever he was around...like he wanted him to see what was there, even if it was broken and unfixable.

“I maybe a creature.. But I'm yours.” he let John see a flash of smile. “I'd follow you to the ends of the universe to please you and make you happy.” He reached up and brought John down for a longer kiss.

John broke into a relieved smile at his brother's words and his own cautious smile. He was more than happy to comply with Gordon's demand for another kiss, using his arms to wrap his brother in a protective hug, where nothing bad could get to him again.

Gordon started to tug at the suit again, this time managing to slip it down John’s thighs but had to stop at the boots. Those had to come off first….however feeling his brother's backside was far more important, sure he still has gloves on and his brother was in tight little trunks but damn there was no way he'd pass on the opportunity to feel his perfect arse.

John let out a gasp when he felt Gordon’s cladded, gloved hand snake downwards and cup his bum, but he just grinned and broke the kiss long enough to breathe out and look into those amazing chocolate eyes.

“Like what you’re feeling there?” He whispered into his brother’s ear, shivering at the coolness of the gloves and at the chill of the station again. It definitely was a lot colder without the space suit on, however this didn’t matter to him. John knew perfectly well from the look in his brother’s eyes that he was going to feel so warm so very soon.

“Boots.” Gordon growled between kisses and gentle groping. “Then onesie… unless…” 

He stood back a little and unbuckled the chest guard and un zipped the suit he had at the back with practiced ease - his own drysuit zipper right down to his own bum though Alan’s old suit only went as far as the shoulders. He snuck a cheeky peek down the front when it was loose enough and the smile on his face widened. He wasn't totally nonfunctional after all, though John was in for a surprise, as he'd gone commando again.

He looked up at John with a devious grin again. “Unless you want me to finish what we started in the shower first.”

John had noticed the widening smile on Gordon’s face, and flushed completely when his brother suggested to finish what had started in the shower. Gordon had only been inside John for what was probably just over a minute before Scott rudely interrupted them.

He didn't answer Gordon straight away, instead got the rest of his own gear off; boots being left on the floor, and the suit and underwear skillfully being discarded in one swift movement. He then sat back on the bench and looked up at his brother with the sweetest little grin possible.

“Take me like you did in the shower...” he purred, “Please Gordon...”

“I’ll try.” Gordon kissed him again as he peeled off the rest of his own space suit and revealing that he was indeed really excited to see John all beautiful and naked infront of him. He hoped to any god that was watching that didn't mind a little bit of incest here and there would be nice enough and let them have their fun. Besides, Gordon did look different down there now all clean and circumcised - and a little bigger looking too, even if it was still the same size as it had been - the scars at least healed but left an impressive mark that was now uniquely his.

There was a bit of a problem with John sitting on the little bench, there was no room for Gordon to sit on top of him as it also had a dip in the ceiling. Kissing him with more excited passion he pulled his brother upright again so they were touching, turning around so his own backside was pressed against the edge of the bench and casually lifted one of his sibling's legs so not only did it wrap around him but rested comfortably on the bench, giving John support and less weight for himself to hold as there was a chance - however tiny - he wasn't entirely strong enough to support all of his weight just yet...that and if things got intense, John could grab the low compartment to keep steady.

Gordon was nuzzling, kissing, nipping and licking as he explored his brother's neck and collarbone, so slender, elegant and majestic and also carefully stroked his back and his own impressive hard as he pressed his body closer and into the most comfortable position, with his own member rubbing under John’s and between his legs, his own body making sure he could feel when John’s was ready for him.

“Oh... mmm... Gordon...” John whined, wrapping his arms around his brother's shoulders as he felt him work down his body. The way Gordon worked his way with his body, tended and cared for it.... jeez John knew he was never going to last at this rate.

Gordon felt so big underneath him, but if he said he wasn't prepared for this, then he was going to have told the biggest lie of the millennia. Ever since Gordon had tried to take him in the shower, it was all that would fill his mind. He loved Gordon so much, and he wanted to show that he loved and trusted him. 

Turquoise looked down into chocolate and John leant forward for another kiss, silent prays that his brother would not want to keep either of them waiting.

He didn't need too much promoting.

Gordon let out a harsh growl as his brother's body enveloped his as unlike the last time the sensitivity was through the roof. He felt John’s fingernails dig into his shoulder blades -bloody hellfire!- Gordon had to hold his tongue as John sunk his teeth into the nape of his neck, clearly the feeling of him inside was more than his sibling had expected. He didn't mind, sure it wasn't a ‘love bite’ as such but John could sink his teeth into him anytime as the marks while may linger with a bit of bruising could easily be brushed off as animal bites from snorkeling dives to keep the relationship secret.

He nuzzled his brother affectionately. “When you're comfortable…. And at anytime it's too much...you can always take a bite.” he said softly and sweetly to let John know everything was ok.

John hadn't meant to bite into his brother the way he did, however the one thing he had forgotten about the first time was that, even with the aid of water, it was still a painful entry. They had nothing at all this time to help them.

A hand snaked into Gordon's hair as he was nuzzled, while the other kept a slight too tight grip on the shoulders. He knew it would get better with time – of course it would – it was just how new John was to this that made his head swim and his body register everything in such a strange way.

“Gordon... I.. I love you..” he whispered, looking at him with the ghost of a smile before biting his lip a little. “I love you... so much..” 

“I love you too.” Gordon kissed his brothers nervous lips but didn't proceed to push John in anyway, with the one leg raised he was in as far as he could physically go and last thing he wanted to do was hurt either of them. While he waited for John to relax he continued to shower him with affection, stroke him lovingly until he could feel muscle tension from his sibling subside before attempting any movement. 

It was slow going and there was no real rhythm but it didn't matter. Each time Gordon pushed into his siblings willing and arching body he ran his fingers over John’s own long hard erection in time with his hips and only did so with care letting his lover's movement dictate the experience. There was an advantage to this almost tantric pace - it helped John get accustomed to his body being penetrated and allowed Gordon to work out the best way to do things he liked to optimize the amount of pleasure he was able to offer. 

Unlike the first few times, Gordon was alot quieter on this occasion though it was mostly because he was now able to concentrate in just making sure John was fully satisfied now he was no longer unwell or under the influence of heavy drugs which left him on the back seat to much of what happened between them. He ran his tongue over his light pinkish nipples and massaged his siblings beautiful skin, the faint almost invisible blonde hairs that raised and fell as his body shuddered in response to touch….

Gordon could feel John’s hot breath on him every time his head rested back against his shoulders and more than once did his kisses turn into little bites that made him ease off a little and give his brother a minute to get his head around the mix of feelings his body was overloading his brain with.

On the other side of the glass of the cabin door, EOS’s camera zoomed in and refocused and unheard to them was a clicking sound like pictures were being taken. The two lovers were far too engaged with each other to notice her sudden ‘voyeuristic’ presence.

Gordon could feel his hand getting sticky as John had started to reach the tipping point, his own body pre releasing in anticipation for what was about to come.

“If you need to, just let it go.” He whispered. “Give in to it and we'll do it together. I promise it will be alright.”

“Oh... mmn... a-ahh... you.. you feel so.. so.. mnnuh!” 

John kept his arms wrapped around Gordon's neck, wanting to forever continue to kiss his brother, but as he grew more used to his brother being inside, he had tentatively wrapped his leg around to try and keep him inside for as long as they could both manage it.

“You're so.. so big.. and it.... nnuhhhhh... I love.. I love you..” 

One hand trailed up to nestle in the sandy blonde hair, John somehow turning his attention how soft his hair was. Like magic... just like the whole experience.

“Gordon...” John whimpered out, “I.. I can't.. ahhh!!”

“I love you John… Orion, hunter of the stars.” Gordon purred between heavy breaths. He had to hold John’s leg to support them both otherwise they were going to fall over and last thing he wanted was the back of his head to hit the bench on the way down. “Hold on tight ok?”

He pushed harder and deeply growled, his hand that was rubbing John could feel his brother let it all out as he arched and shook all over as he came, signal enough for himself to give in to the ecstasy too.

“Ahhh uhhhh! John! Uhhhh!”

“G-Gordon!! Ahhhhh.. mmn.. s..shit.. you.. you make me go crazy.. an’.. and I love it..”

John carefully, and rather floppily, pulled his brother's head up for another kiss, running his hand through the sandy blonde hair and grinned a little. 

The grin soon grew and became a quiet, happy laughter.

“Hah... haha! That was... You’re amazing, you know that?” John breathed, “I've missed you... so much..”

“I've missed…missed you too.” Gordon panted. “You know...ne-next time…. I promise it will be…. Somewhere more romantic than… Where you work….with dinner and everything.”

He nuzzled and kissed John till he was forced to sit on the bench before his legs gave out, pulling John onto his lap gently after him. “I want to look after you the way you do with me, shower you with attention and affection like you really deserve.” he grinned mischievously at the next thought. “Heck if I don't get to see you whenever you do have long shifts like this I'm going to send you dirty hologram videos to keep you company and remind you that I'm all yours, waiting for you when you get home.”

“Ooh...” John moaned quietly at the thought of the holograms of Gordon being sent to him when he was working the long hauls. Just the mere idea was already exciting, especially if it would help John with knowledge that people would actually want to talk with him outside work ethic.

“Oh yeah?” He whispered with a caramel-like voice, “And what would these videos contain..?”

“I haven't decided.” Gordon’s teeth showed deviousness beyond measure. “But it gives me a chance to be creative.”

John wrapped his arms around his brother and cuddled him, taking a moment to just sit in his lap and pause. Total peace and quiet, just the pair of them up on Thunderbird 5. It felt amazing.. but there was still one thing missing.

“Gordon... there's still one thing we haven't done...” he smiled softly, giving him a look. The panda suit was behind them and while John wanted to in a way just stay as they were, he had also wanted to try on the suit.

“Heh, I'm ready if you are love.” 

“Close your eyes then,” John smiled, running his fingers through Gordon's hair still, “Because then... it makes it a little more of a surprise.”

Gordon did so. “Sure. I'll do whatever you want me to. I'm yours remember? I'll get on all fours on the glass in here if you want to be rough with me in that out fit and enjoy the view.”

John laughed a little again at that and kissed Gordon quickly, before leaning over to grab the onesie and stand. He stood back and, leaning against the wall for support, started to dress himself up in the warm fabric that his brother had bought for him. An actual present bought specifically for him. It was soft, a little baggy, cozy and gave the feeling of safety. He definitely knew that this specific outfit was one he was going to wear an awful lot. Once the zipper had been zipped right to the top and the hood was comfortably placed over his head, John swayed back to his still closed-eye brother, carefully sitting back in his lap. “You can open your eyes now... I need an expert to tell me if I look good in this...”

Gordon’s lap felt warm and in a way, he didn’t want to open his eyes - the feeling of his sibling sitting over him was enough to get the blood in his body pumping around at speed, have his heart leap into his chest and pound it like a million drums.

Slowly, he opened them.

“Oh….wow…” Gordon blushed. “You..you look really different.” he chose his words carefully as when he originally bought the outfit it was mostly one of those ‘Ha ha I got my older brother a hilariously silly thing he’d never be caught dead wearing unless it was halloween’ to more of a ‘John really has the most innocent personality imaginable’ and the panda all in one really did make him look adorable - if a such an unmasculine word could be applied.

“I do?” John whispered, “In a good way.. or a bad way?” 

He shifted around a little in Gordon's lap, feeling a little bit under the gaze of his brother, but simply nuzzled into him. Even if he looked like a joke, he wouldn't have minded. It was ultimately the thought that really counted, and that alone made John's heart swell with happiness.

Gordon smiled and shifted one of his brother's hands around his naked body between his legs as he let out a very horny sounding growl. “You tell me.”

John’s fingers almost danced around and smiled quietly when he earned a few more growls from his brother. He'd barely felt his brother since he had come up, so now he was going to do exactly what he wanted, which was to tease and draw out as many amazing sounds as possible. 

“I must look good.” He whispered, trailing his fingers up and down almost too slowly, “If I’m getting responses like this from you... what would you like a helpless panda like me to do?”

“Helpless?” Gordon had an amused tone in his voice. “Rare yes, but not helpless.” He kissed his John on the lips feverishly as he felt his sibling's hand explore him. “Damn….it feels different like this…. I don't think I can go another round this sensitive though John unless you want me to be your bitch?”

John's gloved fingers slowly wrapped around Gordon, pausing at the base and just waiting there for a moment or two.

“Different it may be.. but I'll make it good, I promise...”

The good thing about the costume being soft and the bench being well... plain.. was that sliding downwards off of Gordon's lap and across the bench until his face was in front his hands was easy. His hand slowly began to move back upwards, and then back towards the base, repeating the slow tempo for a few strokes to see how Gordon would respond. 

“Ah! Oh damn hellfire!” Gordon yelped. His skin was all tender without the protection of skin covering his exposed manhood anymore and that was weird enough, but after some of the most sensitive feeling sex he had ever had in his life - any sort of touch was amplified. “J-J John I can't - Ahhhh!” 

He arched and squirmed, letting out the most unusual sounds as his body shook visibly hard to keep a lid on it. “Ahhh! Uhhhh ahhh!”

John grinned as he continued to watch how Gordon responded to the different feeling of the soft onesie gloves. He knew full well that he didn't want to over-exert his brother in any way – since almost continuous rest to suddenly being active in a brand new environment would have been a shock to any system.

“Don't keep it in Gordon,” he quietly encouraged, “You're so beautiful... even more beautiful than the morning view of Earth. I would happily swap the morning sight of Earth for the morning sight of you any day... I—” 

There was no way Gordon could control what spilled out onto the soft fabric of the suits gloves - he couldn't handle how different and tingly touch made him become. He ungracefully fell back against the cabin's hull panting desperately for breath, still shaking though not from being spent or from the cold.

John’s voice cut off fairly quickly when he felt his brother start to become overwhelmed by the stimulus. His fall back against the hull looked unpleasant, if not painful and his breathing was definitely not as before.

“Gordon? Gordon? Hey... hey it's ok..” he released his gentle grip faster than anything and moved to make sure his lover was going to be alright.

“It's ok.. I promise to keep you safe.. ah.. uh try.. big deep breaths now.. come on.. in.. out..”

Gordon did as he was told, although it didn't help much. He gripped the soft suit and pulled John close in an effort to get a hold of the shaking.

No, not here, not now.

“Sorry John, I really couldn't help it.”

“Don’t you be sorry Gordon,” John murmured, sitting down as best as he could while holding onto his younger brother, “There's no need for you to be sorry... you know, just you even being up here with me makes me so happy. You and me... together.. that’s all I would need.”

He paused to just hold Gordon close, trying to still his shaking body, and pressed a kiss to his cheek. He wanted his brother to know just how precious he was, no matter what it took.

“I don't think it matters where we are John.” Gordon gave his older sibling a reassuring smile, “Long as we're together, the world is prefect at a standstill.” He kissed John on the lips. “I'll be ok shortly and we can do whatever you want.”

“I wouldn’t want to overdo it and hurt you...” John pointed out, a soft smile appearing on his face, after having been kissed. 

His smile turned to surprise and slight embarrassment when his stomach made the noise similar to a whale alongside an earthquake.   
“Ah... uh... maybe we could rest and get some food, before anything else happens?”

“Sounds good to me.”


	11. Problems

Gordon looked up as two feet stopped dead in front of him as he was doing push ups on the floor of the gym under the house. With all that time tied down to a bed and the only exercise he had had was having hot passionate sex, he felt he needed to go back and get his full strength back up - after all while regular sex was indeed great for your weight and stamina it didn't do much for your muscles - they still needed to be exercised properly.

“Hey Virgil, what's up?” He asked, sitting upright. He frowned when he saw the unpleasant expression on his sibling's face. “What crawled up your arse and died? You look like Alan’s new cat pissed in your bowl of cheerios!”

“You and I need a talk.”

“About what? The auction? Hey I can't help what that stupid outfit did to me and I'm sorry you're stuck with me for an extra week of the year.” Gordon brushed himself off as he stood up, only to be roughly grabbed by the shoulder.

“You were up on Thunderbird Five yesterday.”

“Well I was helping John with some maintenance Brains didn’t want to do.” Gordon looked at Virgil darkly. Everyone thought John was the hardest Tracy sibling to read his mood but that title was always Virgil’s as while John was shy you could still pick up traces of fleeting emotions however flighty and brief… but there was often times Virgil was like trying to read a stone wall. Even Scott couldn't keep an expression like granite like Virgil.

“Ah. So what I saw on EOS’s holo system was ‘maintenance’. I see…”

“What are you - no one called the station yester-”

Gordon was cut off mid sentence as one of Virgil’s mallet strength fits collided with his head, knocking him off balance enough for Vigil to kick him legs out from under him. As his little brother was trying to get his bearings on what just happened, Virgil then kicked him hard in the chest, grabbed him roughly by his sandy coloured hair and lifted him up enough to keep kicking him in the chest and guts till Gordon started to cough up a bit of blood before he threw him down hard against the gym floor, before lifting his head by the hair again.

“John is MINE. Stay AWAY. Touch him EVER AGAIN and I’ll KILL YOU. Brother or not. I'm not entirely sure how far you got, but if you deflowered MY perfect star I’ll cut your fuckin' legs off and make you watch me feed them to the sharks just off the coast of the island.”

“The truth comes out huh?” Gordon spat blood in Virgil’s face. “You're not homophobic, You're damn gay too!” A smile crossed his face. “Welcome to the club.”

“Don't be so fucking stupid.” Virgil snarled. “John’s just got a body that's pure and untainted to be photographed. He's also the only one of us that people magazines WANT pictures of because having any of him is so rare. Women are CRAZY for his picture, more so than Scotty, me and Alan when we're plastered all over the news as unlike us, John isn't dangerous or doing risky behavior on rescues. But if they found out he was gay and a sick incest sibling fucker I’ll be out of a job. I know that you're a freakish little monster who I'm only sparing the life of right now because ripping you apart would make John suspicious of me...unless I pin it on Scott as we all know how he talks about John being a ‘girl’.” He let go and stood up, smearing Gordon’s blood on his clothing.

“If John wasn't obsessed with you… you'd be fucking dead right now and no one would be bothered to check if it was murder or an accident. Just keep that in mind.” He spun on his heel. “I've got to deal with John now….”

Gordon dragged himself up onto his feet despite the pain and lunged at the retreating hulk. “You stay away from him or so help me I'll-”

Virgil swung around and hit him with such force he crumpled to the ground in a heap, the blow to the head was enough to knock him unconscious. He had no hope of taking Virgil down by himself and his older brother was more than aware of it.

Tentacles reached up and pulled, their suckers tight and leaving marks all over the skin, dragging his body deeper….

Gordon awoke, still on the gym floor in a pool of dried blood. He had that nightmare again, the one where some creature from the darkness of his own mind killed him. Right now Virgil was close enough to doing so he may not need a monster from the deep to tear him apart. He struggled to get up off the floor and let out a heavy groan when he saw bits of tooth in the mess he had lay in for goodness knows how long, licking his teeth he could feel exactly which teeth were broken as they were now sharp enough to cut his tongue. 

Shit. Even though John was on a long shift and won't see what Virgil did to him, he'd know Gordon had been in a fight with someone at the very least as his kisses when he explored his mouth wouldn't be the same. Or maybe he would assume he had an accident on a mission.. That's if he is sent out on one in that time frame.

But that wasn't important. What was urgent right now was John’s privacy and safety from Virgil. That and if he knew about them both he must have evidence of them together that could be used against them. Ok so the threat of Scott knowing he and John was gay was small but there was no way he was going to look past the fact they committed inset with each other….John would probably get the blame just because he was older.

Or maybe not. Gordon knew Scott liked him as much as Virgil…. They wouldn't blame John for anything but Gordon would be the one to be punished, humiliated and exiled into a mental institute… just for being in love with someone.

But it would be worth it if John was left alone.

Gordon picked up the shattered pieces of his teeth and used the water in his drink bottle and his shirt to clean up the blood before dragging himself up onto his feet and stumbling out of the gym to dump his trashed clothes in the wash, grabbing whatever was clean that he could wear and heading up to Virgil’s bedroom to do some snooping around.

There was a few trashy magazines on the desk and Gordon’s caramel amber's narrowed as he saw the covers.

‘Exclusive pictures!’ They read, ‘World's most eligible, sexy millionaires!’ Gordon found himself cringing at the headlines. But it wasn't just those that made his blood boil.

Sure there was the odd photo of Scott doing some sort of rescue, one's of Alan and Virgil saving the day making them look fantastic as eligible single men from a wealthy family doing good for others….but the pictures of John… 

If he saw these he'd accuse Gordon of taking them - simple as that. Half naked or fully nude shots from just around the house or up in space… his older brother would have a heart attack if he knew the world outside of Tracy Island not only saw these, but assumed he was nothing more than a sex toy on legs. John may rarely leave their home but with this information as public knowledge would make sure he couldn't venture out off island for good.

He had to do something.

Spying Virgil’s laptop under the glossy covers Gordon got an idea. Chances are his brother had stuff backed up on other devices, but he could guarantee the computer had the motherlode.

He loaded it up and just as he suspected, there was folders marked ‘hidden camera’ and ‘EOS snaps’ and after glancing through them, he made a little note on a nearby scrap of paper there location and before turning it off, hunted through the ‘EOS’ folder and gaped in horror at the last grouping of pictures.

Holy fuck, they were decent shots - but that wasn't the point. They clearly showed Gordon making love to John, even if they were only taken from the chest upwards….you knew exactly what was going on just from their expressions.

Gordon selected them and before deleting, emailed them to Thunderbird Five. Since they were coming from Virgil’s laptop, hopefully John would be able to data mine the source long after they were deleted.

He erased the evidence despite the fact he wanted to keep them - it wouldn't be safe to and besides, no picture could capture how beautiful John looked inside the cabin as the world and the stars lit up his skin in such a magical way that it glowed - and took the laptop into Scott’s bedroom with his note and left it on the bed so Virgil would be pulled aside and get the lecture for inappropriate behaviors towards another sibling. Scott wouldn't involve John in it he hoped, there was nothing there to suggest it worth his while - secret photos that John was not aware of could be kept a secret and dealt with without him ever knowing.

The only problem was what Virgil would do to Gordon afterwards….but if John was safe then whatever happened to him wasn't important. He may not be a hero to anyone...but it was the right thing to die for, protecting someone he loved.

If only he could take him on a date somewhere...but then Virgil had blown any chance of that in a restaurant off island…. Gordon knew anything romantic now like that with John would be risky. Shit.. Things had to get complicated before they even got to do anything together!

Gordon headed for the bathroom at the end of the hall and after shutting the door, started to strip down in front of the mirror. He could see the dried blood in his hair and down the side of his face, mattered nicely into the scruff of unshaven face fuzz that was going a tad ginger in the blonde colouring against his tan. It was noticeable now but there was little he could do - shaving while bruised and slightly swollen was not a great idea.

Damn did he look a mess. If he was an actor in a dirty action film it was the perfect look, but he was no hero. The lack of pictures in those mags he skimmed through told him his brother's were the heroes and he was just a nobody that was there to do their dirty work or along for the ride. Admittedly you wouldn't want to put photos of Gordon in a magazine when he was covered in blood, dirt and ash after saving someone - but he didn't save cute animals, children or pretty ladies enough to make the papers. No, it was oil rig workers, miners, scientists, TV documentary hosts…. Only hero to those who thanked IR as a whole, but never as individuals.

Even that picture with the Pendergasts he has signed and hung in his bedroom was the last picture he had taken that was ever printed, even only by his own printer. He was nineteen then… he doesn't look as innocent now as he did back then.

They did a charity photo shoot for Penny last year - John, Brains and Kayo included - however the only person to not wind up in the callander was him, the excuse being he moved in every shot. Funny about that, when he and Grandma Tracy looked at them there wasn't anything wrong with them so someone had selectively singled him out. Boy did it hurt to know someone disliked him enough to be so mean….but now he knew it was either Scott or Virgil as neither of them liked him at all. 

Did he blame them? No. He didn't want to be a pilot like them or an astronaut like their father - he had to be different. There was probably more to it but he could guarantee that's where it starts.

He ran his fingers over a few of the many scars that graced his body and could easily identify the exact reason he had each and every one. The biggest ones down his back were hidden under a large red octopus tattoo that patterned his spine, if you ran your hand over the ink you could feel the deep lacerations that only just healed and would never fade. 

They were from pinning Alan to the ground in the middle of a fire fight that erupted while they were busy trying to rescue some innocent people and on the retreat back to Thunderbird Two Alan had managed to get shot in the leg as he lagged behind them. Gordon turned back for him and as more gunfire opened up he pinned his younger brother under him as something punctured the air tanks on the back of his sash.

The tank that was pierced exploded. Lucky it wasn't full - otherwise both him and Alan would have been dead. It was enough to tear open his back though and quite a large chunk of shrapnel embedded into it too.

Lucky to be alive wasn't the half of it…. And only Alan considered him a hero worth respect after that only because it was his life he saved.

Looking back at his reflection he kept wondering what John was finding there worth loving. 

Fuck why was he still thinking like this?! If John didn't love him he wouldn't have had sex with him on Five. Gordon needed to get his own shit together before he screwed everything up more than his discovery about Virgil and the photos was going to do. It wasn’t going to be easy - his self worth was very low and regardless of how much John told him otherwise it was hard to prove his sibling right when no one else could see it.

But he had to. He wasn't going to lose John without a fight even if it was partly with himself and his self confidence….

He gripped the sides of the sink as his body started to twinge. Ok so self confidence and Virgil wasn't the only things he had to fight to keep John...there was one other thing that up until now, being under alot of heavy painkillers had hidden it and now he wasn't under them his body was going to remind him just how fragile he was.

He crossed quickly into the shower and turned it on frantically as his whole body began to shake and sat ungracefully naked at the bottom under the water so that if anyone entered the bathroom they wouldn't see what was really happening to him behind the frosted glass shower door.

Ever since that rescue he saved Alan, he'd slowly but steadily over the last year started to get seizures. At first they were tiny body shakes now and then but now they were fully entire body shut downs for at least ten or twenty seconds - but they felt like hours.

He knew when they were coming, the twinges in his fingers and his legs was enough of a hint now for him to get somewhere safe away from prying eyes before he collapsed in a heap violently shaking fully conscious unable to call out or scream. 

It wasn't epilepsy - it was from a few short years of being shaken, thrown around violently on missions without helmets inside Thunderbird Four, or any physical armour to protect his body from being dropped from heights, having things fall on top of him and everything else that should have caused more permanent injuries. Unlike Virgil who practically had a full suit of armor, or Scott with his arm and leg guards or Alan and his chest plate...the only protection he had was his knee guards and his suit which while thick was easily shredded in the right conditions. Those injuries all added up - especially the knock to the head - leaving him at least once every two weeks making excuses up to hide the fact he had collapsed inside Four on the return trip home or in the hallway or gym and had missed dinner or a debrief. 

There was nothing he could do about it either. No medical miracle existed to fix head trauma unless it was surgery and even though technology and medical science had advanced a great deal there was no guarantee cutting open his head and removing a blood clot or a lump or a tumor wasn't going to leave him paralyzed, a vegetable or kill him outright.

The brain is a delicate organ after all - but it was still largely a mystery to how it functioned in situations like these.

Gordon had been lucky so far it had not happened on a mission yet. It was just a matter of time however before it did and he was revoked from active duty.

He couldn't give up IR. Sure no one appreciated the hard yards he sunk into it but there was little else in his life to do, regardless if he was romantically involved with John or not.

Eventually someone would find out and it would be over. He just had to hope whoever discovered it was nice. He couldn't hide it forever.

He sat in the water as it streamed down his naked body till he had control again. Each time was getting longer but less scary as there was no reason to panic now that he knew it was something he had to live with. At least the blood that was in his hair was gone, leaving nothing but wet curls flat against his head. Few more minutes like this, he decided before he had to show his face around the house and put the mask back on. Few more minutes to gather the courage to lie again for another day.


	12. Seizures

John had been curled up in his bedroom, on the small bench bed with a book. His space suit and thermal undergarments were on as usual, however, there had been one addition he'd made to his attire for when he was colder than normal – so in this instance the panda onesie was on and the sleeves wrapped around his middle to keep it from falling.

Upon A call on his private frequency, a smile grew on his face, only for it to widen a little more when the image of his brother popped up and began to talk. 

“Hey John, I know you're due to touch down in a few hours, so I was wondering if… if you'd like we could go off island for dinner? Just us.” Gordon’s hologram asked. “Nothing too fancy just a takeout place….I doubt you're in the mood to dress up to the ‘nines’ after a shift as long as it's been. We could see a movie and hit an arcade! That sounds like fun!”

A date.

Gordon was asking him on a date.

“That... that sounds really nice, I'd like that a lot actually.” John smiled to his Olympic champion brother, “Movies and food are always fun, as are arcades. It would be a lovely change of scenery too, so sure.”

“Great! We can go anywhere you want, I'm flying the pod.” Gordon grinned wildly. He may not be a pilot but the controls for the pods were generally set up for him and Alan to control them which meant the internal setup was similar to both three and four which allowed short aerial trips to be more than doable by both younger siblings. “So I'll see you in a few hours?”

“Sounds like a plan.” John's eyes sparkled with happiness, “Anywhere would be fine, as long as I get to spend time with you I wouldn’t mind where we go.”

“Right, magical mystery destination it is then!” Gordon laughed. “See you then!” He hung up the holocall and practically danced around his bedroom before catching his scruffy reflection in the window. Oh damn he REALLY needed a shave. He mused as he gave the fuzz a bit of a scratch that John hadn't said anything so maybe it wasn't as bad as it looked...but the dark purple bruise under his right eye was. That still hadn't healed from when Virgil had hit him… and ok so it wouldn't have shown up on the holocall but John would ask questions the second he saw it in person.

Gordon walked out down the hall and up the flight of stairs to the roundhouse where Kayo’s bedroom was located and knocked on the door.

“Hey Kayo, ummm I need to ask you something. Is it ok if I come in?”

“Hm? Oh, sure!” Kayo called back, looking up from her mirror at the desk where she was trying to sort out her hair. She had been trying to style it somewhat, but with her hair only falling to just above her... ah. 

“Wait! Gordon, don't come in!” 

She practically leaped up from the chair and grabbed the towel, yanking it up so she could once again wrap it around herself and not give Gordon any unwanted shows. She made sure the towel was firmly tucked around before coughing and composing herself a little.

“Sorry about that... come on in.”

Gordon opened the door gingerly, slightly worried at what Kayo could be doing on the other side of it. He didn't react when he saw her only wrapped mostly in a towel - though she could have been naked and he wouldn't have cared - woman just didn't interest him in that way.

“I can come back if you want me to.” He said, as it sounded appropriate for the situation even if he did sound unmoved by her nakedness. “I was just wondering if you had anything I could use to hide a bruise, got a date tonight - you do too I see.” He allowed himself a devious smile. “Somewhere fancy? Your hair looks like a bit on the wonky side though, need help getting it to frame your face right? I can help if you want.”

“You don't need to come back, I know seeing me like this wouldn't bother you.” Kayo responded with a small smirk before adding, “We do live together after all, and have done for a long time...”

She shifted back over towards her bed and knelt down to look inside the bedside drawers.

“I probably have the right makeup to hide that bruise of yours... but however did you even get it? It looks painful and I haven't heard anyone falling up stairs recently. The last time that happened, I had to be applying makeup to Scott's face every morning for a week. You’d think butter wouldn’t melt, honestly!” 

Kayo sifted through the drawers, fumbling around the various pots and tubes of colours that she had until she found a few various colours of foundation she hoped would match his skin tone.

“Alright, come sit on the bed. Who's the lucky person you're going on a date with?” She teased, genuine grins spreading across her face. “And... it would help a lot if you could help with my hair after, if you can.”

“Scott with make up? Ok I can understand Virgil maybe… But Scott? Who’d have thought?” Gordon chuckled as he sat where Kayo told him. “How about I ask you who you're lucky date is first?” He said, hoping the conversation about her own romantic evening plans might get her to drop the subject about his own date and the bruise. He didn't mean to slip up that he was going on one himself but he had been so excited it just sort of happened after the auction kerfuffle there was a chance not only did Alan know, but she would too. Gordon knew Alan didn't approve much or at least seemed to find it awkward and had avoided him like he carried the plague and Virgil knew however that was a time bomb Gordon knew would explode - it was just a matter of ‘when’.

“It's not a date.” Kayo lied a little, squeezing a little bit of foundation onto the back of her hand so she could apply it more easily, “Well, not exactly. Lady Penelope is coming over, so I figured I might actually do myself up a little, if you know what I'm getting at. Close your eyes for a second while I get the makeup on.”

Gordon grabbed her arm gently. “Penny is coming here?” He said darkly. “Since when? Thought she was too good for us to do that since dad died. You know she was attracted to our old man right?”

It took all of Kayo's might to not start smirking and laughing in front of Gordon at his comment. She bit her lip as best as she could and put the brushes down for a second or two to face him properly.

“Gordon, whatever makes you think Penny would have been attracted to your father?”

“I don't assume Kayo, Penny is Bi-sexual. She loves her men older and mature and her ladies young and pretty. If it was a choice between you and me because we're the same age she’d pick you because of the four year age difference. Only reason I followed her around was one, I knew this so nothing would ever eventuate between us and two it kept my own secrets...not that it matters, it's well and truly out the bag now.”

“She... Gordon, what are you even on about?” Kayo asked him, slightly confused. “Why do you think this about her... where's your proof?” 

“It isn't, it's about you - argh! Not so hard!” he hissed as the brush that had the foundation on was jabbed onto the bruise with force. “I don't want you hurt.”

“Ah... oh, sorry about that. I told you not to move too much..” Kayo murmured as she slowly continued with the handiwork of the foundation cover up.

“We’ve been dating for a long while, Gordon.” She eventually admitted, keeping her eyes just below his, “It's uh... part of the reason why she was skirting around you so often when you were faking trying to woo her. You didn't want to be sussed out.. and neither did we.”

Gordon let out an amused snort and smiled. “Well I guess we're all into keeping secrets then! Don't worry, will only ever say you're out for a ladies night. Secrets safe with me - besides I may not live long enough to tell anyone.”

“Haha, thanks Gordon,” Kayo smiled softly, finishing up with the covering of the bruise. 

“There we go, you look good as new. Just... don't go bashing into anything, or smudge it. If it gets in your eye, it stings an awful lot. Trust me, it's not nice at all. Anyway, Penny wanted to tell you that.. well, she wants to talk to you about everything. Try to put everything that's happened between you both aside, even if it’s just for this one time..”

Gordon sighed. “Do I have to? It's not really necessary. I'm kinda getting enough ‘chats’ as it is, with some more possibly violent life threatening ones in the immediate future. I honestly can't take anymore.” He stood up and followed Kayo over to her dresser where she sat down, handed him a brush and he started to gently do her hair, styling it as he went. “Surprised you find it hard to style with straight hair like yours, it's when it's a mass of curls you can't do very much with it without ripping chunks of hair out. I should know, ‘fizzy dunny brush head’ wasn't a nickname I got off Scott all through primary school for nothing. You want it up at the back fully or have a few loose runners?” he said letting Kayo see the difference herself before he continued. “May need a few pins to keep the runners neat but they'll look stunning.”

“She wants to put things right with you, especially with after what happened at her charity event. She had no idea Gordon... believe me, if she had known, you would not have been in that position at all. I've had a talk with her too, about this all, that the way you both act now is just a little silly. You'd be surprised how easy it is I can persuade her on the small things if I threaten the right priorities.. but that's beside the point. I have no idea what my hair does at all.”

“That wasn't her fault so she doesn't NEED to Kayo. I like her as a friend, why does anyone think I don't? I don't have many friends, you know that.” Gordon started to pin Kayo’s hair in place and reached for the curling wand to style the runners he let hang loose to frame her face. “Things are just a little complicated at the moment, that's all.” He saw her expression in the mirror and sighed, caving into pressure once again. “Ok, I'll be a good little rat in a cage. It's all I am right now anyway...heh, who knew doing something that everyone sees as wrong but feels so right cause so many problems?” he stood back to admire his handiwork. “It's all set, just don't pull a jumper over your head or it will all fall out, pins and all. At least one of us should be able to have a date tonight without feeling a right mess.”

“She feels really bad about it though. Her charity event, her friend, her fault... in her eyes at least. She wants to see if you're alright, and not just over a holocall.”

Kayo leant back a little in her seat as Gordon worked on her hair, watching him carefully in the mirror before letting a grin run across her face.

“So, who's your date tonight then? Who's the lucky fella? Someone we know?”

Gordon’s eyes looked away a few minutes as if to debate internally whether or not he should tell her.

“Promise me...promise me you don't get grossed out or yell?” he couldn't hide the worry and fear in his voice. He knew by his own admission that his relationship was more than just socially wrong - it was morally and genetically wrong too. Any positive reaction would be fake and he knew that as fact.

Kayo looked up at him and turned in her seat to face him when he asked if she could promise him. Not only did it arise confusion, it also made her a little alarmed and concerned for Gordon.

“Gordon... what’s going on? You're not doing something you don't want to do, are you? Because if someone is making you act out of your comfort, then you should tell them because it wouldn't be fair on you!”

Gordon looked affronted. “Who me? No it's not that at all it's just…” he looked sullen just as quickly as he was offended. “It's complicated. Mum and Dad would disown us if they were still alive.’

“Us? You mean... you and.. one of the others?” 

“Yes.” 

Kayo sat there, staring at him, a little stumped. She had not expected that revelation to come out of Gordon... nor did she expect it to come out quite so easily. It was almost as if he hadn't said it at all, but he had, and now it was out in the open for her go know.

“Who... exactly is your date then tonight? And where are you both going? You haven't told me that yet.”

Gordon fiddled with the brush, pulling hair carefully from the bristles. “I don't really know...was thinking just some simple take out place where people won't know us… maybe hit a video arcade or see a movie? Ok so not a big date sort of thing like fancy dinner or night clubbing.. But we don't leave the island so simple is fine…” he started to ramble.

“You don't leave the island... you mean you and John are...?” Kayo sat back a little in surprise and looked at Gordon to wait for his reaction, and boy was it a treasure to see. His whole face seemed to blush up, and his confusing rambling ceased almost instantly.

“You and John are dating?” She asked in a softer, quieter voice, hoping Gordon would continue to communicate with her.

“Not quite...we're more in-intimate than that…” Gordon could feel himself heat up and shake. “Alan caught us...a-and so did Virgil….you're lucky it's another person your not related to and that you're both woman..straight guys find lesbians a turn on...you could make out naked on the couch and only Grandma and Brains’s wife would batter an eyelid… heck I think just John being gay seems to be ok….” 

“I never understood why we'd be some special interest by straight boys. What's the big idea about it all... though I suppose then I should keep quiet about the fact that we have made out naked on the couch before when I've been to manor...” Kayo mused with a flash of a grin, “I don't want anyone oogling at what's mine... just like I suppose you might feel like that with John, right Gordon?”

Sure, Kayo was fully aware that it was in no way considered a normal relationship that both boys were part of, but the evidence was right there. Prolonged closure to the rest of the world with only each other for company would take its effects. If they were going to be happy, then it was not going to be her who was stopping it.

“Gordon?” 

Gordon looked as his hands before he seemed to register something was wrong but it was too late. He didn't have a clue what triggered it this time and he couldn't move out of Kayo’s bedroom fast enough before he collapsed on the floor, violent shakes taking over his entire body.  
Everything went blurry and out of focus and he could hear Kayo’s voice and just see her move in the corner of his vision as he lost all control and ability to function for what seemed ages….but was maybe ten seconds or so - he couldn't tell.

“Gordon! Gordon, what the... shit!” Kayo swore as she moved from the chair down to the floor next to him. The towel she had wrapped around her body had come loose, so instead of covering her up a little, it was sliding down her back. Did she care? No. 

In an instant, she was up again, moving to shut the bedroom door and grab a blanket and pillow from her bed before returning to the floor where Gordon was. The pillow was propped under his head and the blanket was draped over his body in an attempt to make him comfortable.

“Jeez... Gordon what's going on...”

When the seizure subsided Gordon groaned and rolled over in an attempt to get up. His body was drained of all his energy and despite his best efforts, it wasn't going to happen.

It took a little bit for him to workout what happened. For a moment he had no idea where he was and why Kayo was by his side on the floor, half naked.

That's not a good sign - a laps in memory of the whole thing meant this time it was more serious.

Kayo repeated herself before he could answer, his mouth all dry and his voice all hoarse and trembling, “It's ok...it's normal.”

“Normal?” Kayo parroted in disbelief, “Gordon, this is in no way normal! This is totally not normal... do you need a drink at all? Do you want to move to the bed? It'll be a lot more comfortable than the floor... jeez.. this is bad..”

“I'm ok, honest Kayo. They have been happening a while now...and I can't stop them.” He finally found the strength to stand, even if it was at a wobble. “And they're not gonna stop me either, I won't let them, nor let anyone think that I'm broken.”

Kayo helped support him as he moved upright, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and planting her feet firmly on the ground to keep him steady. She looked at him, searching his face for a few moments before pulling him towards her own bed.

“I don't care what you are going to say Gordon, you're going to get some rest here.” Kayo stated, pushing him back until he fell into the mattress and was lying back, “You are going to rest and once you feel well enough, you're going to tell me exactly what this is all about so I can help. If you're not going to be talking to the others about it, at least tell me.” 

“I can't.” Gordon resisted. “Gotta get ready for a date. Why are you wearing a towel?”

“I don’t care right now. You need your rest more than anything else, ok?” She paused a minute to pick up the pillow and blanket without the towel falling away completely. “I.. just got out the shower.”

“Who...who did your…” Gordon eventually got himself free from her grip. “Hang on...I did that, didn't I? Oh fudgsicles.” He gripped his head. “Shit this - this is bad. H-how long was I on the floor f-for?”

“Only about 10 seconds. What uh... is there... no, Gordon you should really just try to rest up, ok? You sound exhausted, so please... else you won't be able to make that date at all. Better late than never.”

“Sorry, can't stay.” He straightened up, the confusion of the seizure starting to wear off. “Got things to do.” He shook his head, there was no point trying to piece together the last half an hour if Kayo wasn't going to help. Must have been unimportant if she didn't seem to worry about it. 

He looked at his watch. John would be touching down soon and he didn't have time to organise the pod. So much for sneaking in any suprises for the evening.

“Gordon? Gordon, don’t walk past me - I'm trying to help...! ...you..” Kayo sighed as Gordon stumbled off past her. He had no recollection of what was going on, and in the time they had spoken, she herself had heard FAB1 land and Penny enter the villa. 

So much for meeting her. But just as she had said herself, being late was better than never getting down at all. 

She found her most comfortable clothing and hurriedly for dressed, not wanting to be any later than she was, and not really liking the idea of letting Gordon out of her sight. She ultimately had no idea how much Gordon had forgotten, so the reaction of seeing Penny on the island was going to be different to him knowing she was coming. 

Gordon headed back down the two flights of stairs to the living room and paused. Lady Penelope was talking to Scott in the dug out in the couches drinking a coffee made by MAX. 

Since when did she visit? Hang on…

“Hey Gordo! Look who dropped by for a visit!” Scott beamed. “Looks like you didn't need to go to the event after all!” He walked over to Gordon and slapped him hard on the back playfully before leaning in conspiracy. “Don't screw it up.” He smiled before walking down the third lot of stairs to the kitchen.

“Er...hi?” Gordon looked confused. Penelope patted the seat beside her.

“Gordon.” Penelope smiled, holding onto her cup with one hand as she patted the seat to invite him to sit down, “It's lovely to see you up and walking around properly now. Kayo's been keeping me as filled in as she could with how you have been fairing, but it certainly is nicer to see you back up on your feet.”

Gordon looked really confused. “Since when? I get hurt all the damn time and until recently, no one has given a rats arse. Why the sudden change?” He folded his arms and stood his ground. “I've been hurt far worse than that believe me...I've almost been killed on more than one occasion and no one bothered to even say ‘hi’ to me.”

“There's no reason to become defensive Gordon. We always check up on you or leave you messages after you get hurt. Just because we live in different corners of the globe, doesn't mean we can't keep up with each other.” Penelope chided lightly, pausing to sip her coffee.

“I like to be able to keep up to date with what's going on when I'm not around. How long has this been going on for?” 

“Years.” Gordon looked dead pan. He didn't hear Kayo come up behind him, he was too busy losing his attention to the fact Virgil had entered from around the corner - highly likely that he had been sitting around by the pool table on the second leather sofa out of sight and only shifted to get a better view of the carnage about to unfold.

“That's not what Penny meant, Gordon.” Kayo whispered as she came up, trying to not look like she’s sped down to get to the lounge. “And why is it that you've suddenly started walking so fast? When did that even happen?”   
“That's beside the issue, Kayo.” Penelope interjected, getting up and handing MAX back her now empty cup of coffee. “Don’t be so tense Gordon, honestly. There's no reason to be.” 

“Unless you got something to hide.” Virgil added slyly.

“What? No! I just have things to do! I don't have time to waste sitting around playing mind games!” He tried to leave but Kayo was blocking his closest exit.

“Now Virgil don’t you be silly. Why would Gordon have anything to hide when he’s been ill this past month. From what Kayo was telling me, you had a lucky escape. Thunderbird 4 wasn't too badly damaged, was she? I know how much you care for your ship.”

Gordon paused. “You know I haven't thought about that… actually I haven't thought about her once.” He shrugged. “It's just a machine.” He shrugged.

“John had to cut a hole into her hull.” Kayo offered, looking at Gordon, “That was how he was able to get you back inside and keep you sheltered.” 

“Oh.” This information was new to Gordon. No one told him that. “Well yeah of course…”

“We should walk.” Penny decided with a smile. “I haven't seen the sea yet since I've got here. Care to take me as close as we can get?” 

“Maybe later… I really have things to do.” Gordon persisted. He had no time for this, John was going to touch down any minute and he wanted to grab him and get off the island as fast as possible. He couldn't relax and be himself here - not anymore. Right now, more than anything he needed to escape. He moved to head for the stairs for the kitchen and luckily Kayo was faster than Virgil to follow him, the bigger Tracy deciding that this wasn't the time to corner his sibling.

Gordon didn't get very far down the steps, just enough out of sight to stumble down a few and sit on them as another seizure struck. He couldn't have prevented it if he tried.

He reached out and gripped kayo's shirt as the shakes came, he may not have been able to call out but at least she knew well enough to hold him close to avoid him falling down the rest of the stairs. His breath was heavy as his body shook, stopping a few times - enough to feel someone shake him to check he was still ok. When they eased and he could speak, his mouth felt like the time he tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon for a bet.

“Need to see...B-Brains….n-n-now…” he gasped out. “T-Tell John….I'm s-sorry.” his grip tightened on her shirt as another two smaller ones occurred - the only noticeable effect they had was that Gordon seemed to shudder violently as they passed. They left him more drained than the one in Kayo’s bedroom and he knew he wasn't getting up without any help this time.

“Stay calm.. it's going to be ok Gordon. I've got you steady... take it slow. We'll get you to Brains. Just take it easy, and leave it to me ok?” Kayo instructed as gently as she could. Catching Gordon in the nick of time was one thing, but having to restrain him to prevent any injuries involving a flight of wooden stairs left her feeling more than a little worried for him.  
They should have noticed this sooner, right? 

But then again... with her discovering that he too had kept secrets from the family, would they have even known if it wasn't for ill timing?

*

“We have docked with the platform on Tracy Island.”

“Thank you, Eos.” John smiled, pushing the shoulder restraints up and standing, looking to the elevator airlock door. Outside of them lay a world containing everything that reminded him of his real home. His family, his civilian out-of-work space, the comforts of environmental changes around the island.

He waited until the doors dutifully opened before taking a bold step outside of the Earth-side part of his Thunderbird...

Ah, gravity. What a heartless bitch it can be sometimes.

One small trip up down the stairs to the walkway wasn’t about to dampen his mood however, and just as quickly as he fell down, John pulled himself up and ran a hand through his hair to make sure it was all still in the right place. He was not going to let re-entry ruin his evening with Gordon. If he could just avoid the sickness that came with it for the evening, he would be so relieved. Even if it meant being stuck in bed until his next shift – it wouldn't care. One night, That’s all he wanted. 

Gordon groaned as he leaned heavily on Kayo to the slow walk to the infirmary. She paused everytime she felt him tense up and waited until the shakes passed. They were small - but they were enough to weaken him each time they occurred. She would regularly tip his head back and check if he was ok, though it was hard to tell with his eyes all bloodshot. He was conscious and talking however, his own attempts to reassure her he was still functioning and aware of where they were going were enough to keep her calm and focused on getting him to Brains.

“H-Head feels like it's splitting open but we're ok.” He mumbled when she asked how he was fairing. “J-Just a bit further…”

“You can do it Gordon... you're doing so well now... we'll get you to Brains and he will help you. And then you can try to rest up as much as you can before you go bananas from extended periods without swimming. I'm sure your trunks are missing you terribly..” 

It was Kayo's way of trying to crack a joke in the most awful of incidents. She wanted nothing more than to magically find a spare wheelchair and plonk him down in it, the journey was absolute torture since they were moving at a snail's speed. 

She had to wait for Gordon though. No speeding off, no nothing, just letting Gordon move at his own pace. 

And by god she hated the slowness. Each time he shuddered it only grew her worry more, but she never outwardly showed it as to ensure he stayed calm himself. It seemed to be doing the trick for now. The corridors seemed endless like this, though by the surroundings, they were not too far from the entrance to the hangers. 

To her knowledge, nobody was down near the hangers or any of the ships, so she hoped that they would be able to continue to Brains unnoticed. Carefully she tilted his head back again to have a look at him and breathed out another encouragement before stopping them both at the sound of another voice.

Even though it was still a little far off, she recognized instantly that it was John's rather audibly pleasing monotone voice droning on quietly, presumably to himself, about emails he was being sent. Voicing them to himself had always been a little characteristic of his after all - a result of spending too much time alone.

Gordon must have heard it too, as he started to tug their movement into another direction with spectacular failure, both crashing in a heap on the hall floor. There was no way he was going to be able to stand up afterwards, lying limp and trying to not shut down entirely. There was no way he could hide this from John - it was ask for his help or be left in an uncontrollable hell.

John was walking up the corridor at a fast pace – the vibrations of his voice quietly reading out emails to busy his brain and distract him from the inevitable post-entry illness getting louder every passing second. Kayo glanced sideward to look at Gordon, worried that his fall had made him even worse.

She almost didn’t want to look up when she heard John stop before them both crumpled on the floor. His sharp intake of breath and the bleep of his mobile comms switching off caused her to again look at Gordon .

John himself was in shock. He was at first slightly confused by the situation before him, but after a couple of seconds, when neither made moves to get up or any noise to indicate they were ok, he began to worry. While still slightly wobbly would usually have had a negative impact, he used gravity to his advantage and knelt down to the floor – to Kayo and Gordon – to make sure they were ok.

One look at Gordon meant a thousand words.

“Gordon? Gordon, Kayo? What's going on?”

Gordon mumbled something mildly incoherent before a bigger seizure rendered him unconscious. Something was wrong having them happening one after another - as that had never happened to him before.

John instinctively reached out to put a hand on Gordon’s shoulder the minute he began to writhe on the floor, Kayo using her position under him to hold him steady until the seizure had passed before sitting up and holding Gordon close. 

Neither could speak as they worked to get Gordon into John's arms, John making sure he was held safe against his chest before following Kayo down to find Brains and get help.

As they neared the infirmary they spotted Scott emerging from the room. He didn't look too crash hot either and John gave a little nod to remind himself that Scott may have had his own minor episode and was down here trying to rest up before venturing out into the main house again. Scott frowned when he registered a bundle that was shaking in his younger brothers arms and the ‘caption serious’ face was plastered on his features as he let them in the doorway and came over to help as John lay Gordon on the floor as Scott instructed.

He leaned over Gordon and carefully rolled him onto his side and checked his airway wasn't blocked in the same way he would treat someone for shock.

“Kayo, Moffy is in the room next door. Tell her to come in straight away with some relaxant and that weird device she's working on. We're going to have to skip testing and hope that thing is operational as we need it to scan Gordon’ head immediately.” Scott said in a calm and authoritative voice. He may not have seen what lead up to this point - but the shakes were not stopping when they should have in the time he had done and he was beginning to suspect something serious was wrong. “John, grab me the sheet off the bed and fold it so it stays reasonably flat so we can slide it under his head and keep talking to him.” 

Scott then stood and raided the cabinets, hoping to find some syringes for the medicine he asked Kayo to ask Moffy for. Brains’s wife was a scientist, but her main degree was in medicine before she branched out and having her live on the Island full time was a blessing in disguise.

John was reluctant to let go of Gordon when he was in this state. It wasn't even the fact that they were lovers that had him overprotective – at the end of the day they were still brothers, and so he felt nervous. He knelt as carefully as he could before letting Scott push him aside to check their brother, watching as Kayo darted off to get Moffy. 

Scott was telling him to be useful too. He had to get one of the sheets and make it into a pillow of sorts. He could do that.

Standing up was a small feat in its own right, the effects of gravity weighing down on him hard, but he maneuvered his way to the bed highlighted and pulled the sheet off with a relatively swift motion. Folding was easy, and no sooner was it a smallish square, he had it removed from his hands and placed under Gordon's head.

“Keep talking to him.” Scott repeated. “If he comes round he's going to be terrified. I've got a pretty good idea what's happening, I could be wrong but I have dealt with these things on rescues before.” He gave John a weak smile as he came back to him and checked Gordon’s breathing and heart rate. “You also know I know what this feels like - collapsed on the ground with no control over what your body is doing.” Gingerly, he started inspecting Gordon’s head as something unusual caught his eye. “That,” he pointed to some discoloration to his younger brothers cheekbone, “Doesn't look like a good sign.” Scott knew Gordon had bruised a little from when he had hit him a while ago but he knew he didn't strike him as hard as the marks were indicating...that and it was the wrong side of the face too.

Even under Kayo’s patch up job with makeup, the purple and blue marks were highly visible, a sign he wasn't just hit - but had been beaten at some stage. There was other factors too however that Scott was aware of that would have had to affect him sooner or later - inspecting carefully areas he knew he had to patch himself after removing shrapnel a year or so back, to make sure it wasn't caused by those old injuries.

Scott looked up to see John struggling and got up to lead him to a chair while Gordon was stable enough to leave for a minute. “Easy John. We don't need all three of us on the floor like fish out of water.” Scott could see the memory of that day clear in his brother's eyes, triggered by Gordon’s current state. John heard the commotion on the coms but didn't see how bad it was until he touched down as soon as they themselves reached the island. 

Virgil had raced Alan in covered in blood and shrapnel wounds and told John and Kayo that they needed to help him and that he and Grandma can sort Alan out. At that point he didn't see how worse it could be...until he boarded Thunderbird Two.

Scott could recall he had himself never seen so much carnage but at the time he was too busy trying to keep the second youngest alive to transport him to the infirmary with Moffy and Brains’s help. There was shrapnel wounds everywhere, some embedded in his head at the back but the biggest thing was the large chunk missing from his back from where the oxygen tank had exploded. That, was the most confronting thing either of them had to see - a gaping hole where Gordon’s shoulder blade should have been.

That is why even now he had to be careful with John. Seeing both Gordon and Alan in a mangled state had messed with him so much that now it affected him whenever either of them were hurt...and why they didn't tell John about any other ‘accidents’ on rescues.

“He's going to be ok John, trust me.” 

“How can you say that Scott?” John managed to gather his thoughts together for a fraction of a second to meet his look. “Gordon could be... he's... how could we have missed this? I've been watching him like a hawk over this past month because of what happened and I... I've still failed at it! He shouldn't be bruised, he shouldn't be hurt, he shouldn’t be lying on the floor with a sheet under his head as a makeshift pillow because we've missed something!”

He couldn't help himself. He was so mad that something like this could have happened while Gordon was supposedly under his care. His fault, surely, for not noticing this. 

“I’m sorry... I shouldn't have shouted at you..” he mumbled a moment or so later, walking over to the cabinet and taking a packet of wet wipes. “I’ll get the makeup removed...”

Scott grabbed his wobbly sibling and pushed him gently back into the chair. “You are staying put until your head stops spinning and you calm down. So you didn't see this coming, neither did I and I'm around him almost twenty four-seven when he chooses to be socially inept which hasn't been much of that of late, he's turning a bit like you with the reverse in social skills. He's gotten very good at keeping things from everyone and after seeing this and while I don't approve of him not telling us - it's obvious why he never mentioned it.”

There was a groan from Gordon’s place on the floor and both older siblings looked in his general direction. He didn't move, but the moan indicated he was coming round despite the shakes.

John felt disorientated as Scott pushed him back into the chair, his head lolling backwards to look up at the ceiling as big brother tried to talk him round. Not that it mattered though, it didn't make him feel any better to what was the situation.

He hoped that his brother was in the dark about one thing. Scott hadn't yet cottoned on to the fact that his two younger siblings were lovers. If he knew... he would not be so willing to help.

“Gordon?” John blinked and looked around when he heard a groan coming from the floor. Nothing outwardly showed that his brother was any better, but if he could come round, hopefully he would say what the hell was going on.

Scott left John in the chair to check on Gordon again. The noise he was making, was only being done so because he was barely lucid, not completely conscious. He was quite possibly in a great deal of pain and this was the only way to voice it.

“Scott? How is he? Is he coming round? Gordon, are you ok?” 

Words seemed to pour out of John's mouth faster than he could process them. He was so worried for Gordon it was unreal, but right now he had to trust his big brother to check if he was ok. The packet of wet wipes were getting squashed in his hand – his hand was clenched so tight.

“Scott?”

“He's slowly coming round...not out of the woods yet.” Scott glanced up at John weighing up his options on how he was going to move Gordon onto the bed now he had stopped seizing. Neither he nor John could really lift him without dropping him and carrying him between them wasn't an option. He then made an executive decision, “We'll just have to wait till Moffy and Kayo arrive.”

“Will he be ok though?” John frowned, sitting on the edge of his seat and using the small hard armrests to push himself up. “Scott he has to be ok. He needs to be ok... he'll be bored stiff if he has to be bedridden again – anyone would.”

“I don't think he's going to have much of a choice in the matter, John.” Scott clicked his tongue. “This is going to leave him tied down to the house for sometime.” he let out a sigh. “And we were supposed to do some training refreshers back at the ranch in a few days...even if he can come with us he's going to go insane being unable to participate and after this we can't exactly leave him home alone.” He gave John a weak smile. “I'm open to suggestions little bro.”

“We were going to be going back to the ranch?” John echoed, temporarily distracted from his younger sibling’s condition to look at Scott in confusion. He had not heard of this event coming up at all, which made him feel a little more put out.

“...I can always stay and keep Gordon company if Brains and Moffy think it will be too laborious for him to travel over. I'll have work to do anyway, and it would mean someone can still fully monitor the comms if necessary....” 

He let his voice trail off a little as he looked back down to his lap, stopping to think himself what he had just said. If he and Gordon had the house to themselves... that would be nice.

Scott nodded. “I think that maybe best.”


	13. Stood down

Gordon stirred. As the mist in his vision cleared he began to feel parts of his body deciding this was the appropriate time to start cashing all those pain checks he had been avoiding while out cold.

He knew something seriously bad had occurred to wind up in the infirmary this time but was at a loss as to what it could be.

Glancing upwards at the little clipboard above his bed his porridge-brain made a valiant attempt to read upside down. The only words that he could make out in big enough letters was ‘head trauma’ and even then he had to mouth the words aloud before he understood why he was in a bed feeling like he had fallen down the side of a mountain - which wouldn't be a first time.

“How you feeling, kiddo?”

Gordon turned his head to see Scott reading some paperwork. Little known fact - Scott wore glasses on occasion to read, mostly all the time in regards to Professor Moffat and incredibly tiny spidery hand writing.

“Like I fell off a horse.” He mumbled. “Trampled by it too.”

Scott smirked. “Yes well you would know with you expertise with animals.”

Gordon frowned. “So I'm afraid of lizards and horses.”

“And cats, dogs, pretty much anything domesticated.” Scott mused. “Except rats. I'm unsure why you like them.” He outwardly shuddered. If there was one thing other than losing his brothers in action he was afraid of, it was rodents. Why couldn't he and his brothers be normal? Virgil had a fear of drowning, John a fear of crowds and Alan’s - was best never mentioned.

“So.. Am I playing ‘guess what stupid thing I did yesterday’ or are you going to tell me?”

Scott gave little brother a dirty look but didn't take the bait. “You had several serious seizures, Gordon. They were close to being life threatening. How long have you been having them? Things that bad don't just ‘happen’, kiddo.”

Gordon tried to get his head around what Scott was saying. He knew he had something wrong with him but his brain had blanked a majority of yesterday out. Could all those minor episodes he had prior caused gaps in his memory too?

“I-I don't really remember. Sorry Scottie.” He genuinely looked worried and confused. “Possibly ages. I lose track sometimes.” he winced and gripped his head. “Hurts like hell though.”

“We did a head scan when you were ok but still seizing.” Scott said in a serious tone. “You've got some severe older contusions to the skull and a few fractures we've never seen come up before. Your clear of tumors and clots thankfully but something has been damaged that we can't seem to put a finger on. The brain is a very complicated organ and we don't know enough about what's going on to go fishing around inside your head.”

“Wait, all the shakes and the blackouts, they're because of head injuries?”

“Looks that way.”

Scott gave Gordon a reassuring smile. “Until we sort out your medication your on emergency back up duties only. With the head trauma being permanent we don't want to risk having you on full rescues until you can handle them without your entire brain shutting you down. Brains said it's not going to stop them from happening as you can't treat what you have had going on, but it will be far better than nothing at all.”

“So you’re taking me off active duties permanently?” Gordon tried to process this from his sick bed.

Scott shook his head. “We can't do that to you, but we do have to limit what you can do though. You're not the only one though so don't worry.”

“Not the only one?” Gordon asked confused.

Scott dug into his jeans pocket and produced a leather case which held a diabetes test kit and an epipen with insulin. “”I've never told anyone till now. One shot in the morning and if it's bad, one at night too. Never had any problems, but that's why I didn't get into the air force like dad wanted...because you never know when it could be. I've had a few close calls to be honest, but it's nice to finally tell someone other than John.”

“I never knew…”

“That's because I'm very good at hiding it. I didn't want my little brothers thinking I wasn't perfect you know? It's taken a long time to realise that it doesn't matter that I'm not.” He ruffled Gordon’s hair. “Just rest up, I'll try sorting this all out and send John down here when he wakes up.” He let out a chuckle. “I had to slip some sleeping pills into his cup of tea to get him to calm down - he’s been getting all worked up everytime he hears your down for the count lately, bit like when we were all little. Can't say I know what changed, but I'm happy to see him seem to care about someone again...ever since dad vanished and Virgil told him off about worrying about Alan that one time..” He shook his head. “Anyway it's good to see that side if him back even if it's over the top.”

Scott stood up and added, “By the way, Penelope still wishes to talk to you. I’ll just send her in shall I? She's just waiting outside. I'll go grab John in the meantime.”

Gordon let out a small groan. He felt like dirt and she was the last person he wanted to see. He couldn't recall her wishing to talk to him before on her own terms either, preferring to usually avoid him. Penelope entered after Scott walked out after what seemed to be a brief exchange outside the medibay.

Scott hadn't been joking around when he said that Penny was waiting outside to talk to him – she had been there since Kayo had taken her down to wait. They had both been sat on the cushioned chairs by the medbay doors, leaning against each other and eventually Penny being a pillow while Kayo slept. 

She had taken no time in walking into medbay and to the chair clearly placed out by John before he had been chased out and made to sleep. She didn’t sit down straight away however, instead choosing to lean against the backrest and lean down a little to look less imposing. 

“It’s good to see you finally awake again, Gordon. How are you feeling?”

Gordon suspected he looked like the living dead, and wasn't far off his assumption but having Penny try and intimidate him while in this state was a waste of time. For a start, the dark rings under his eyes and his paled features allowed him to stare back with just as much intimidation without any effort, making Penelope shuffle uncomfortably under his amber gaze.

“You tell me.” His voice sounded like gravel being skidded over in FAB1 at high speed.

“You… could look better.” Penny quietly admitted, looking back towards the door for a moment before collecting herself and looking back at him. She knew she couldn’t put it off any longer without Kayo giving her the cold shoulder. Yet she, like Scott, was stubborn. What she was about to do was not something she did everyday, and she was really hoping that Gordon was not going to make it more difficult than she was going to find it.

“I... I wanted to say sorry, Gordon. For everything... that I've done to you.”

“Sorry for what? Acting normal with me being a utter pest? No, you're not sorry and shouldn't be either. It’s me who should be sorry for using you as a ‘fake interest’ to hide myself from my brothers.”

“Gordon.” Penny cut him off before he could try to say anything else. Damn it, this was supposed to be about her trying to make it up to him – not the other way round! She took a breath and moved to sit down in the seat instead of standing, giving him a little almost guilty smile.

“I was doing the same... using you to hide myself from family... and the press. I knew I took it too far sometimes... I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry for how I've been treating you.”

Gordon shrugged. “That's nothing new. Everybody uses me for their own thing all the time. I'm realising that far more now than ever.” He gave her a smile. “It's ok though, something finally good has come out of it and being open.” He tilted his head a little as if to show he was interested in talking, but all it did was make him look more exhausted. “So… who's the lady you're chasing?”

“What good has come out of it?” Penny asked, genuinely curious. Only a pocket full of people knew – Parker, Gordon, and of course Kayo. She never trusted anyone else with what she regarded as a secret worth protecting for everyone's sake.

“Kayo and I have been dating for a few years.” She admitted with a smile, looking at Gordon after having a stare off with the floor. “Much like I can tell you have someone on your mind? Is.. that why you were hurrying earlier? You had someone to meet?”

Gordon tried to think for a minute. Somewhere in the depths of his head he had heard this information before, but couldn't for the life of him figure out where. Little did he know Penny was asked by Scott to go easy on the brain strain because of the permanent head injuries they discovered, unfortunately Kayo didn't mention that he had quite a bit of memory loss from the seizures themselves and Scott wasn't aware of them…. If he was, he would have included those in his ‘be careful what you mention’ speech.

“Well, congrats to you and Kayo.” Gordon said eventually. “I’m sorry somethings are a bit of a blur of black and grey at the moment. I can't even remember why I was hurrying around for… was I? I know I had a date…..”

He rested his head in his palms. His head was really starting to hurt trying to fill in the gaps and the flashes of what he could recall he wasn't going to open his mouth and admit - Penelope didn't need to know he wanted to avoid her, nor did he need her to know he was doing something with John… the likes of which he couldn't quite remember but the expired movie tickets beside the pills on the side table were an obvious clue he hadn't fully connected the dots on yet. 

“Take your time to think things over if you need to, Penny assured him with a soft smile, “I.. wasn't expecting you to actually listen to me at all...”   
She blinked and sat up, turning around when she heard the door open again, revealing a sleepy ginger, who was rubbing sleep out of his eyes with his palm.

“Gordon?” John yawned, before addressing Penny herself in a brief hello, “You're awake.... how.. how long?”

“Too long I think….” Gordon attempted to perk up, but could barely manage a cheery grin. “Sorry I’m in bed again.”

Penny stood up as John made his way over, squeezing the older brother's shoulder in a friendly fashion before heading out to give the pair time to themselves.

John was quick to take the seat next to Gordon and reached out to take his hand, smiling as he gave it a reassuring rub.

“Don't you be sorry for being in bed again, a lazy day is always nice sometimes when life's been hectic, right? I don't mind what we do, I just need you and I'm set for anything.”

Gordon waited till Penny was out of sight. “I know what I want right now.” his arms reached out inviting John to sit on the bed for a hug.

John grinned and moved over to sit on the bed, wrapping his arms around Gordon in a loving, almost protective hug. He pressed a soft kiss to his cheek and sighed softly, “I miss you too much... It’s been lonely recently without you. All I have is my panda onesie... but I need you too.”

Gordon snuggled into the embrace. Out of all the confusion, this was the one thing that was stable and unchanging. Out the corner of his eye he spied Virgil talking to Penny outside the door glaring in - burning holes into John's back with his disapproving stare.

Fuck that.

Gordon pulled John into a kiss, one that they both really needed but in the doorway steam could honestly be seen coming from Virgil's ears with the sour expression that sat there.

Jealousy doesn't suit you, brother.

John gave as much as he received in the kiss. He let a hand wander upwards and tangle in Gordon's hair, happier than just a few seconds ago. It was always when he thought he was a s happy as he could be, his younger brother always found a way to make him feel even happier to the point of bursting.

Yet... something felt wrong. While the kiss was greatly accepted, there was a hint of.. force in it. As if Gordon was trying to prove something unknown to him.

He caught his line of gaze and followed it the moment they broke off, turning around as best he could without letting him go and found himself staring face to face with Virgil in the doorway.

Virgil had immediately broke eye contact and moved away from the doorframe, out of eye shot but still able to see into the room from an angle.after all, he didn't need John to suspect him of anything as while he wasn't a fighter, John could still put up a good one with the right motives. Virgil had on more than one occasion been the end of John’s bottled up explosion of anger and boy could it hurt like provoking a sleeping tiger with a stick.

Virgil never acted like that, John was sure of it. But from where he was sitting... he couldn't have been able to tell where his brother had gone, so he didn't think much of it.

Besides, he never remembered the medical beds being as comfortable as they were now. 

Though... that could have also had something to do with the fact that Gordon was lying in bed, still holding onto him.

John turned back around and nuzzled his younger sibling a little, giving him another quick kiss before biting his lip and smiling. He wanted to try and show at least a scrap of control, but really, he just wanted to continue to kiss Gordon over and over again. 

Alan poked his head in to see how everything was going with his older brother and rolled his eyes at the sight before him. John was lying along side Gordon on the bed, his arms protectively around him, occasionally twitching and curling in the fingers as he subconsciously was checking he was still there. This was an entirely new level of wrongness - but only in a very small way… that's if he didn't think about the possibility that they have been intimate with each other - then it was extremely wrong.

He wasn't much of a reader, but asking some very vague questions from Brains’s wife he was able to be directed in the right direction to some information about it - though there was no way he could pronounce what psychiatric term was. However what was happening didn't quite fit the description of people who are sexually attracted to siblings… John and Gordon didn't seem to show many if at all the standard common tropes he could find, they sort of had it happen because of the situation and living conditions they were presented with. But then that was the same situation he, Scott and Virgil were in as well, so maybe they did have a level of attraction some other way that was different than normal.

Either way, Alan still couldn't understand why they were getting this involved with each other. It was gross, immoral, socially wrong and yet -

Watching them together you could see they NEEDED each other. How could you possibly reach any other conclusion?

Deep down Alan knew he should tell Scott. But what would it solve? John locking himself away permanently on Thunderbird Five to waste away and Gordon… the possibly that this could kill him one day was something that wasn't openly discussed, but by goodness everyone had thought about it in the last few hours.

What was he supposed to do?


	14. Illusion is broken

“Are you sure we can leave them alone at home Scott? What if Gordon has another one? You expect John to be able to deal with that?”

Scott rubbed his brow. “Yes Virgil, I trust John can handle it.”

“But doesn't he need more training too? He was really behind on everything on the last ones we did, John is getting a bit careless and slow in his responses.”

“Virgil,” Scott placed a hand on his brother's shoulder. “John can do with some hands on medical training. Leaving Gordon in his care for a few days might just be enough for him time handle. All calls will be directed to us at mum’s ranch anyway apart from anything that needs Thunderbird Three and Four and you know we don't get calls for them that often.” He slapped his broad siblings back and then shook life back into his hand as slapping Virgil was like slapping a marble statue. Hit him the wrong way and you broke all your fingers. 

Virgil looked back up from his breakfast and towards the stairs that lead down towards Brains’s lab, the gym and the medical bay. As much as he wanted them separated, it wasn't going to happen till he got back.

Gordon stirred and stretched, only to nudge John with his elbow. It was a bit of a surprise having John still lying by his side and not itching to go back to his home away from home. He wasn't that important for him to spend time with - was he?

He slowly sat up and stumbled once he had his feet on the floor. He needed a quick shower...after he took his medicine. Where did it get put anyway? He started searching for it, knocking a few things over in his clumsiness.

In between the time that Gordon had been medicated and given time to sleep, John had changed out of his space suit and into the next comfiest thing that he knew would bring comfort to his brother – his panda onesie. Despite living on a tropical island, the extra heat coming from the suit did not cause him any discomfort after he fell asleep – instead it helped him with sleeping under the knowledge that his brother would be nicely tucked away with him, all nice and safe.

However, having a light sleeping pattern meant that the moment he heard his little brother wake up and fumble around, John was awake too – just as when Gordon came up to Thunderbird 5. He moved into a seated position and watched his brother for a few moments with a smile before remembering that he had to speak.

“What are you looking for Gordo?

“My medication. Scott said I was supposed to take some.”

“Where about have you looked so far?”

“The shelves mostly. I don't know where he could have put it.” He didn't add ‘you probably need to supervise me encase the dosage they prescribed was wrong’ because John probably already had been told.

John uncurled himself as he moved towards the edge of the bed, getting off and walking over to help Gordon find the box of medication left for him. Trust Scott to leave them somewhere not immediately findable. It took him another couple of minutes before he found them under a pile of folded, clean clothes.

“Here we are. Looks like Scott also provided you with some new clothes so you don't need to trek further to your room.”

Gordon frowned. There was a clean pair of undies on the top of the pile. Scott was ever so insistent that he wasn't allowed to go commando. 

Sod that.

Gordon took his new fangled pills and swallowed, then started to strip down as he wandered out of the medbay, his clean clothes untouched.

He wasn't ashamed of what he looked like anymore. Maybe wandering around like a nudist might indicate to Scott not to try and encourage him to dress like a decent human being.

John watched Gordon swallow down the pills with spectacular fashion – he hadn't even needed a glass of water to help wash it down. He hoped that his brother would make a comment on his attire, but as he was ignored, John had to simply watch his lover strip down to almost nothing and wander out the room.

Such a so-called simple task.

Down the hallway Gordon took note of John's footsteps following him behind and smiled deviously to himself. John seemed a little miffed he hadn't reacted to the onsie, but Gordon knew how to tease.

After all it was taking him alot of effort just to avoid pinning his older brother to the nearest wall and plunder those soft rose coloured lips for everything that they were - gentle, loving, inviting - but when he made it into the kitchen, that self restraint was going to be cut loose.

At least AFTER he had a little fun.

One thing he had learnt from his experience was that it's only fun to chase if the pursued joined in the game. 

And for once, he wasn't the terrier chasing the stick with the bone on the end.

“Gordon, you're not even going to say good morning to me?” he asked in a fake whining voice, sticking out his bottom lip to emphasize on his acting of being upset. John knew full well that they were alone, so he was going to make the most of it while he could. 

At least, he hoped he would be able to. At the rate they were going, any longer Gordon swayed his hips, John was going to have to break away and find somewhere to lie and wait to be found again...

Gordon opened the cupboard and before John could speak to him about ignoring him, smeared a blob of blackberry jam on his nose, much to John’s surprise as his reaction was confused.

Gordon then smiled slyly. “Panda’s got to have a cute nose to wiggle.”

Something was on his nose. It was sticky and quite dark in comparison to his complexion. It smelt sweet though, and just as he tried to cross eye to see what was there, it was gone again, and instead the cheeky grin of his brother was looking back up at him.

He didn't give John a chance to think before licking off the jam. “Hang on, I can do better.” The smile became suddenly devious as more jam was smudged back on his older brother’s nose and under his eyes on his cheekbones, giggling as he went and lapping up the trails afterwards.

“Oh yeah? And what else do pandas need then?” He smiled back, using a teasing smile that Gordon has been privileged to see a few times before.

“Hmm.” Gordon paused theatrically. He had a idea. 

Putting down the jar of jam he started to undo his trousers from the previous day and as he reached the glass doors and slid them open, he let the heavy denim drop to the floor so he was naked and John got a good view of the huge red kraken tattoo down his spine. He looked back casually before answering John’s question. 

“They need a swim.”

And with that he stepped outside, teasingly waving to John to join him as he headed for the pool.

“They need a swim, do they?” John mused quietly, pretending to look deep in thought to stall a moment or two before grinning. Gordon had already gone off ahead, and now that he had his beautiful tattoo on full show, John was almost fully prepared to do what he planned to do.

He could always trace those beautiful movements of red tentacles later. Right now he had a better idea in mind.

John suddenly broke into a run, sprinting up and, with somewhat practiced ease, swooped and picked up Gordon from the floor and happily carried him outside to the poolside.

“But Gordon, surely you know that a panda might not want to go for a swim alone, and especially not get their fur wet.” He whispered into his brother's ear, of course, was talking about his onesie. “What if they needed some extra encouragement to take a dip into the water?”

Gordon gave John his famous ‘are you for real?’ raised eyebrow only he inherited the genetics for - something passed on from their grandfather, just like John’s flame red hair - as John placed his bare feet on the concrete. 

He didn't give John any time to speak and tell him off for the smug expression that followed afterwards as Gordon grabbed his onesies fabric and pulled as he allowed himself to flop backward into the deep end of the pool, dragging his brother, suit and all in with him, kissing him as his back made contact with the water, giving John his own air as his brother would have been caught by surprise.

It was a weird sensation, the fake wet fur of the onesie fabric against his bare skin and how much it tickled under the influence of the water. Bubbles floated out from beneath every little hair surrounding John in a personal bubble cloud. Eventually he would have to let him go to resurface, while both of them could physically hold their breath in extremes - only Gordon had the body structure capable of sustaining it in high amounts of pressure.

He watched his sibling surface first before he followed suit and started laughing when the sight of John’s wet hair plastered down to his head from the water got the better of him. Gordon’s wasn't much better, but his was far shorter and curled and waved upon running his hands through it.

“You may want to take off the suit before the chlorine ruins it.” Gordon chuckled, his hands getting a good grip on the sodding outfit and unzipping it. He slid his hands under the now heavy fabric and peeled it off his brother, taking a breath as he went under to slid the entire thing off which was surprisingly easy to do underwater but the extra weight the onesie had now only wanted to do one thing: sink to the bottom, which it did once it was free.

He resurfaced for another breath before diving under again, this time to remove his brother's satin boxers that were billowing around under the water like they were in a wild windstorm before retrieving the panda outfit as well and resurfacing at the pool's edge to drag the soaking clothes out with a brilliant ‘slap’ as sodden material hit concrete.

Now… where were we? Oh yeah…..

He swam back over to his slightly embarrassed sibling - skinny dipping probably never figured into his life at any one point, and certainly not with his younger brother - wrapping his arms around his shoulders and kissing him before diving under to run his fingers and hands all over him, the sensation of touch completely new and altered in the pool.

Sex in the pool was out of the question, bit of a physical impossibly under water but Gordon didn't need to. He could still tease and play with John below, as long as his own air held out and didn't swallow a huge amount of chlorine water. 

It was a brief tease, but it was enough before surfacing and needing to fill his lungs with air. He didn't know what it would have felt like getting a blow job underwater but giving one was a skill that he was determined to master if John let him have another go.

That was, until the next attempt had him coughing up water, gasping for air and clinging to John trying to work out what just happened. Something inside of him decided ‘no, your not allowed to have it this easy’ and forced him to abandon his quest.

He rested his head against John's wet flame locks and couldn't understand why he suddenly felt very weak. Too much too soon maybe? 

“I'm sorry about the date.” Gordon mumbled. “Maybe we could try again?” He nuzzled John playfully even though it took some effort to move without letting himself slip into the water. He wasn't going to let his brother know that adrenaline had gone as fast as it had come, a physical reminder that he couldn't be as silly as he wanted...and what he wanted was to have John pin him down and take him over and over without much of a break or with any mercy, hell maybe never pulling out the entire day, keeping Gordon as his play toy in any of the positions he desired.

Sure he wouldn't be able to walk straight afterwards but the thought of being intimate and as close as that without parting was a fantasy Gordon always had… just never had anyone special to try it with.

He whispered in his brother's ear before kissing him passionately and offering up his body, “My body is all yours, fill it over and over again and again until you can't anymore. I'm your willing vessel and want to be blessed by being one with you, the hunter of the stars, who's skin glows in the night sky like a god who burns with passion to be loved.”

He then pushed himself away and climbed out of the pool, his blood red Kraken tattoo glistening in the sun and enveloping his spine, it's tentacles tracing over deep wounds and scars hiding them from the world.

He stumbled a few steps and reached out to grab a deck chair to steady himself. He wasn't going to give in. He promised he'd give John a good time and he meant it, even if it was just going to be a dinner for two in the kitchen or have John take him here on the damn deck chair. 

He turned to see if John was following but the pool wasn't there anymore and neither was his brother…

Gordon awoke, startled and panicking till hands reached over and pushed him back onto the bed.

He was in the medbay, hooked up to weird machines - just like the day of the accident.

“Easy Gordon, you're having a nightmare.”

Gordon looked towards the sound of the voice, which was hard with a respiratory mask over his face. “Alan?” He finally strangled out.

“Yeah, it's me. Calm down or you'll wake up John.”

Eyebrows knotted slowly in confusion as Alan pointed over to the corner to indicate where their other sibling was sitting, snoring lightly in a panda onesie with a blanket over his shoulders. “You collapsed on Kayo and Scott and John tried to sort you out till Moffy’s little brain scanner invention found you had a tumourish lump on the brain. You were rushed into surgery and have been out cold for a week.” Alan let out a relieved sigh. “I'm just glad you're not a vegetable and John will be too. He's been going a little crazy unable to do anything to help you.”

Alan sat back into his chair beside Gordon's head of the bed. “Seriously you're lucky it's me watching over you as you started to come to. If Virgil or Scott heard what you were dreaming about out loud I think they'd pull the plug! Freckle heckle! You...you honestly think about John like that? Wow… I didn't realise how bad you had it for him. Though, I had an idea it would be as much as he does for you.”

He seemed to muse a little. “You guys need to be more careful if this is supposed to be a secret.” he warned. “You guys are far too open and obvious and they're going to find out sooner or later.”

Gordon mumbled as best as he was able. “Virgil...ows.”

Alan sat up tall. “He does!?”

“Why...do y...ink I'm hav...oblems?”

“That's bad.”

“Te...e..out..it”

It had been painful for John, waiting again for Gordon to wake up. For the first time in what felt like an era, his brother’s were showing genuine concern over the state he was in, and to a degree, it made John madder. What was different between hypothermia and this? Both had landed Gordon in such fragile states.

John wasn't mad when Alan was around, though. He didn't feel like he could be, after everything Alan had done to help keep Gordon safe. It was Alan who had suggested that the two of them took shifts to watch over their brother after all, so he had to cut him some slack.

Seeing Virgil made his blood boil. Ever since he had seen the email containing the obscene images of himself, he couldn’t stand his older brother play the innocent carer card. He knew that Virgil knew a degree of what was happening, and it was mildly horrifying. He had to keep himself together though, for Gordon's sake.

So he had tried. Books were read at high, semi-focused speed. Albums and playlists became the sounds that filled the background. John had even tried stitching together and patching up some of his old clothes he never had given to his Grandmother, but nothing was coming close to being a way to slow him down and rest. He just wanted Gordon to be ok.

Alan stood up and gave John a bit of a shake in an attempt to wake him.

“Hey, sleepy head. He’s awake.” He said, playfully. “Looks and sounds like you expect but awake.”

“Oh.. go..ro..a..ree”

Alan found himself smiling at Gordon’s attempt to tell him to get stuffed. He found it even more amusing since his sibling looked drunk as he attempted to raise his middle finger at him and couldn’t quite aim it in the right direction.

“Mmn... mn.. mm..Alan was’sup..?” came the eloquent reply from John in the chair. He was curled up under a blanket and blinked a few times to get back to reality... ...only to see Alan and Gordon messing around as usual. It snapped him out of sleep straight away as he sat up in the chair, the warm blanket falling away and to his shoes. “Gordon?” 

The rude gesture turned into a half-hearted drugged out wave from Gordon’s lying position. “Tha..y na.., don....ear it..ut.”

John couldn't help but laugh a little in surprise and happiness as he heard and saw Gordon try to gain a sense of decency and comedy while still heavily under the influence of the drugs in his system. “How are you feeling?” 

“Li..otton wo..” Gordon replied. His voice kept crocking and dipping in and out of volume. There was no description for the level of pain that was behind his temples and even if there was, he couldn’t articulate it if he tried. He let out a groan of discomfort as he received a stabbing pain from the back of his head and tried to shift away, but the respirator mask, wires and tubes around his head were preventing much movement. Thankfully no tubes were down his throat… Gordon always pulled them out - he was afraid of choking on them in his sleep, even when there was no such danger of it occurring.

“Ha..at..een..ashed?” he vaguely pointed at the onesie, curious as to how long John had been wearing it for.

“Yeah.. I had it washed a few days ago..” John murmured, instinctively pulling it closer around himself as if to keep himself warmer. “You'll feel better now that you’re awake... I promise you that. Just.. don't strain yourself too much, because that won't help in your recovery. Take it slow.”

“Eas...for..ou to..ay.” Gordon mumbled, wincing and shifting again uncomfortably. “..at hap..ed?”

“You collapsed.” John explained, looking at Alan a moment before looking at Gordon again, “You collapsed and then we’re taken into surgery after a tumor-like lump was found.”

Gordon's mouth was a perfect ‘O’ shape as the reinforcement of why he was there was recounted. “So w...dn't go..inny dip...in t.. pool? No..ate..oh...fuc..”

“We didn't go whe—” John stopped himself before he fully repeated what Gordon said, a furious blush spreading across is face faster than wildfire. He coughed a little as he tried to regain a balance, suddenly finding it a little hard to look at Alan in the eye as he watched on. “No.. we uh.. didn’t do that..”

“Ah...mu..be..dre.” Gordon looked disappointed. He was pretty sad that he ended up in here instead of the date he had planned. He wanted to take John to a romantic restaurant in Sydney that rotated around with a full panoramic 360 degree view of the city from above, then duck into some of the shopping arcades and with John’s phobia of crowds, have his brother hold onto him tight as they weaved through the city, ate interesting foods looked at different things, maybe wind up at a movie…

But now, he was one hundred percent unfit to fly, unfit to travel ANYWHERE. John was left with what? A bedridden brother and a completely useless lover, and what was to say that he wouldn't develop another or still suffer seizures after this?

All he wanted was to make John happy, to be close to him like they always use to be. Now he was broken, busted, damaged goods, not good enough for anyone.

He tried to look away, he didn’t want John nor Alan who was still in the room to see him cry. It was all but impossible, tears streaked his face, his chest heaved in sobs.

Worst lover in the world.

Watching Gordon try to hide himself away was a form of slow torture. All John wanted to do was pull his brother's shaking form close and sooth him right there and then, but at the same time he knew he had to respect any non-worded boundaries. 

Instead, he pulled up a chair and sat by the edge of the bed, right up at the top to lean in a little closer to Gordon, smiling a little as he whispered in the quietest of tones he doubted even Alan would be able to catch onto “was I doing well in the dream?” 

John knew full well he really shouldn’t be teasing when Alan was still in the room, but the youngest had already silently witnessed a fair bit of drama between them, and fortunately hadn't said anything. John still acted carefully, but allowed his carefulness to be manipulated to include an element of creative, witty comments because it was only them.

“..ou we.. brill..ant.” Gordon gave him a smile.


End file.
